How to Write Condolence Cards

When someone loses a loved one, it can be difficult to know how to share their grief appropriately. How can words make a difference during this time of grief? However, sending a condolence card with a sincere message from the bottom of the heart will help the bereaved person feel cared for and loved, providing a little consolation for them during this traumatic time. Refer to Step 1 and the next steps for how to write a heartfelt condolence card.

Table of Contents

Right action

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Begin with an appropriate greeting. The most common way to start a condolence card is to start with the word “Dear.” You can also use the word “Dear,” or simply begin with the name of the bereaved. Avoid opening with “Hello” or other informal greetings – it makes the card less formal.

For the person you are writing to, use the same name as you would normally call that person. If you’re writing to a teacher you usually call “Miss Hien,” write her name on the card. If you are writing to someone you know well, use that person’s name.
If the card is intended to express condolences to the entire bereaved family and not just an individual, write down each person’s name. If you don’t know the names of everyone in the family, just write “you Sang and family.”

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Write down how you feel sorry for the person’s passing. Say that you feel sad and sorry to hear that the person has passed away, and if you know the person, mention his/her name. If you don’t know this person, you can subtly refer to them as “my mother” or “my grandfather’s grandfather,” and so on. For example:

He was sorry to hear that Mai had passed away after a long battle with cancer.
I was deeply saddened when I received the news of Hoa’s death.
No words can describe my grief when I heard that Sau passed away.

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If you don’t know this person well, consider keeping it brief. Wrapping up your card after succinctly expressing your condolences is the perfect way to send a card to someone you’re not close to. Accompanied by common phrases and not easily misunderstood. Write sentences like “always remember you with deep sympathy” or “please accept my condolences” if you want to keep the card short. It will be more special if the condolence card you are using has a printed note or poem inside. Here are a few examples of brief feelings:

You are always present in my mind.
Our thoughts and prayers are with you.
We are always thinking about you.
I will pray for you during this difficult time.
We will remember [the deceased] during this time of grief.
[The deceased] will always be in our minds.

Think of a special case

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Write a poignant message if you know the deceased well. Usually, you’ll have lots of memories to share and things to talk about if the person who just passed away was someone you knew. Consider writing on another piece of paper as a draft to jot down your thoughts before writing on a condolence card. Think about what you know about the deceased, and try to write honestly and naturally. Here are some examples:

Dear Nam, We are really sorry to hear that Loan has passed away. She is such a lovable and kind friend who always makes time for others, and we all love her. Loan’s students will always remember her as a dedicated teacher and role model. If you need help with errands, house cleaning, or anything, don’t hesitate to give us a call. We are here to help and our minds are always on you. My sincere condolences to your family, Hong and Hue
Dear Cuc and Tuan, We would like to express our sadness to hear that your lovely daughter has passed away after a long battle with illness. What a brave girl! We will miss her every day. Our thoughts and prayers are with you and your two sons. If there’s anything we can help, don’t hesitate to call us. Best regards, Dao and Duong

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Express your sincere condolences if you have never met the person who passed away. If you can’t share memories of the person who passed away, you can talk about the good things about that person, or simply express your grief for the loss of a family member. Here are a few examples:

Dear Linh, I am very sorry that your father passed away. Although I have never met your father, I know that everyone around Huy Hoang area admires his enthusiastic working spirit. How good it is that you spent time with him in the last days of your life. Give me a call if you need anything or simply need someone to chat with. I always turn to you. Sincere condolences from the bottom of my heart, Huy
Dear Vu, I am very sad to hear about your brother – Long. I know how close you two are to each other. If there’s anything I can do to help, don’t hesitate to give me a call. Condolences to the family, An

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Write your sincere condolences on the death of your pet. You can show similar heartfelt affection when you write a condolence card for someone whose pet has recently passed away. Try to remember and include in the card a few details about the pet. A few typical examples are:

Dear Chau, I am very sorry about Shadow’s passing. I remember the first time you adopted him 13 years ago. That’s a great companion, isn’t it? Our path now won’t be the same without her footsteps by your side. Sending you my sincere condolences, Duc
Bao, I heard about your lovely Birdie. It is truly a special cat. It’s hard to believe that she won’t be seen running around the garden next spring as she used to enjoy when the weather warms up. My condolences to you, Hong

Know the etiquette of sending condolence cards

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Always send condolences by card, not by email. Even if you learn of someone’s death via social media or email, it’s even more poignant if you send a card in the mail. You can buy condolence cards from the store, use a white card with a matching picture, or write your condolences on pretty paper. Condolences should be handwritten or typed in blue/black ink.

Condolences should not be sent via text message.
If sending condolences via social media or other means, you should also send a card.

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Send cards even if you intend to send flowers. Even if the bouquet comes with a small card, send a separate condolence card so you can express your sincere condolences. ^{[4] X Research Resources} This allows you to write a note and sign your name rather than using pre-printed condolences from the florist.

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Send a card even if the person is long gone. It’s best to send a card as soon as you hear of the death, a few days or weeks after the person’s death. However, you can still send cards months or even years later if you don’t know anything about the person’s death. If you don’t, the bereaved family will wonder if you really cared. While it’s a little embarrassing to send a card late, it’s definitely better than not sending it at all.

Advice

Send condolence cards as soon as you hear of someone passing away. You will have the opportunity to speak directly to the bereaved, but sending a card to show them that they are always on your mind is a profound way to show your respect.

Things you need

Card
Pen
Envelope

Steps

Right action

Think of a special case

Know the etiquette of sending condolence cards

Advice

Things you need

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