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This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 29 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 5,738 times.
Going through tough times is a part of life. Sometimes life is like a challenging maze where you have to make difficult choices that can leave you feeling distracted, overwhelmed and hopeless. Let’s start solving this problem by finding solutions to relieve emotional stress immediately. Learn how to handle your emotions to reduce your inner conflict and tension. Accept that tough times happen to everyone. The solutions below will help you feel stronger, more capable, and ready to face future challenges.
Steps
Stay Calm for a Moment
- You can do deep breathing anywhere: at work, at home, in the car, in the dishwasher, in the shower, or anytime you feel anxiety creeping in. Friend.
- If possible, try to focus on belly breathing.
- Identify the problem that is making you think.
- Identify points on the body to flap. Some of those points are: [4] X Research Sources
- Outer edge of hand, tender flesh.
- Middle of the head.
- Head eyebrows.
- The outer bone next to the eye.
- Philtrum.
- Tap one of the points above with two fingers. Tap about 5 times on that point. Then move on to the next point.
- Repeat self-belief. For example, when you pat, say to yourself, “Even though I feel like I’m about to cry every minute, I really believe in myself.”
- Notice which muscles you are tense in and let your breath and focus on the number release that tension.
- For example, teddy bears can have nostalgic meanings about safety and comfort, or movies that inspire you. Maybe the image of a certain celebrity reminds you to be strong in the face of adversity. Looking at pictures of your children or loved ones can make you feel empowered.
- Studies show that developing the flexibility to be able to shift attention from what you find difficult to what you enjoy is important for managing negative emotions. [7] X Research Sources Derryberry & Rothbart, 1997; Longigan & Phillips, 2001; White, Helfinstein, Reeb-Sutherland, Degnan, & Fox, 2009
Release Emotions Safely
- Use a journal to write things that help you release your emotions and always remember that no matter how painful the feelings are, they are just feelings and will pass. You are an entity and the best way to release your emotions is to find them and write in your journal what works best for you.
- In fact, experts discourage you from expressing anger by smashing things, or doing anything violent to release anger. Such actions may increase feelings of anger rather than calm them. [10] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source
- In addition, exercise is also a good way to release pent-up anger. Some studies show that running or doing other aerobic exercises can help calm you down after experiencing unpleasant things. [11] X Trusted Source PubMed Central Go to the source It’s because exercise releases endorphins, a natural chemical that boosts mood. [12] X Research Source
- Check out more articles in this category for safe, healthy expressions of anger.
- In an emotional journal, write down how sad you feel, how your body feels, and what helps you to touch your sadness. Sadness often appears in difficult times, have the courage to recognize sadness and release them. [13] X Research Sources Mikpajczak, et al.
- In your emotional journal, write down all of your concerns regarding the difficult time you are going through. Then, jot down any possible outcomes that you can think of, positive or negative. You should also write down any changes you need to make to your life that might be frightening you. Write down the reasons why you are afraid to make those changes.
- Keep writing until you find the root of your fear. Release your emotions to the point where you can be proactive and at least know your options can help calm you down. You can’t eliminate difficult situations in your life, but you can understand the fear and that will help ease the fear. [14] X Research Source Mikpajczak, et al.
- For example, imagine that you are bored at work because you are never praised. However, you are afraid to say it out loud. Just the thought of having to talk to your leader frightens you.
- Find out why you are afraid. Is it because your leader often doesn’t listen to the opinions of others, and you’re afraid he won’t listen to you? Is it because you don’t feel confident talking to people in leadership positions? Are you afraid that giving your opinion about rewarding your work sounds demanding and you will lose your job? Identifying the cause of your fear will help you take the next step.
- Once you know why you’re afraid, consider situational approaches to dealing with the fear. For example, if you don’t feel confident talking to your boss, you could ask a friend to practice with you. Write down what you will say to your leader in the way you want and the way you fear the outcome will be. Then practice first with your friend. This is a safe way to solve problems and give you more confidence.
- Be patient with yourself. Dealing with fears is a lifelong learning process, and it can take time to get over the fears you’re facing.
Realize Your Inner Strength
- If you can’t find a meditation class nearby, you can find many online. The UCLA Center for Mindfulness Studies has several meditation guides available as downloadable MP3 files. [20] X Research Sources
- There are also a number of mobile apps that offer guided meditations and short meditations.
- And of course, wikiHow has many articles that can help you learn how to meditate.
- In the United States, the University of California, Berkeley’s Greater Good Science Center has a website with a variety of mindfulness techniques you can try out in your life.
- You can do many mindfulness exercises in just a few minutes a day. For example, the next time you have a snack, enjoy it slowly. Try to focus on every aspect of that experience, using all of your senses. What do you smell, see, hear, taste and touch? Is it the same as when you eat food? Can you feel the food moving from your throat to your stomach? Focusing on the little things will help you practice mindfulness in your daily life. [23] X Research Sources
- Write down results you are proud of. Write about the last time you made someone smile. List your personality traits that you love, what makes you brave, times when you have to be patient. Add these to the list every day.
- List all negative thoughts about yourself related to the situation and edit them into positive, factual statements. Clear statements like, “Things always fail in my life” can gnaw at feelings about self-worth. Try to reframe such statements with thoughts like, “Life is challenging. Everyone goes through difficult times. There are times in my life when things go well.” You can list successes, just to remind yourself! [25] X Research Source Davey, Maureen; Eaker, Dawn Goettler; Walters, Lynda Henley. Resilience Processes in Adpescents: Personality Profiles, Self-Worth, and Coping. By: Journal of Adpescent Research, v18 n4 p347-62 Jul 2003.
- In your emotional journal, list the things you are grateful for. Write down the things you are grateful for every day, big or small. Maybe you see a patch of grass greener than usual. Write it down in your gratitude journal. Maybe today you didn’t give up and decided to face the challenge as best you could. Sometimes not giving up is the best we can do. Write: “Today, I did not give up” in bold and be proud of yourself.
- If this helps, observing the outdoors will give you a glimpse into the strange world of nature, the mystery of life, and the beauty of everything around us. Be stronger knowing that humans are capable of surviving any difficult situation, and you are one of them.
- Why did you decide to find a way to stay calm so you can handle the problem? Is it for your child? For yourself? The ones you love? Pet? Or because you need life? Personalizing your meaning will help you stay focused and calm when you’re struggling with life’s difficulties. [27] X Research Source Das, Ajit K. Frankl and the realm of meaning. By: Journal of Humanistic Education & Development. Jun98, Vp. 36 Issue 4, p199.
Take care of yourself
- Eat healthy foods that are good for your body and mind like fruits, vegetables, protein and healthy whole grains.
- Walk in 10 minutes. Short run. Exercise for blood circulation and to relieve stress.
This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 29 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 5,738 times.
Going through tough times is a part of life. Sometimes life is like a challenging maze where you have to make difficult choices that can leave you feeling distracted, overwhelmed and hopeless. Let’s start solving this problem by finding solutions to relieve emotional stress immediately. Learn how to handle your emotions to reduce your inner conflict and tension. Accept that tough times happen to everyone. The solutions below will help you feel stronger, more capable, and ready to face future challenges.
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