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This article was co-written by Lucy Yeh. Lucy Yeh is a licensed human resources director, recruiter and life coach with over 20 years of experience. With her experience as a life coach for the Mindfulness Stress Reduction (MBSR) program at InsighLA, Lucy has worked with professionals at all levels to enhance the quality of their careers, personal relationships/ expertise, self-marketing, and life balance.
There are 15 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This post has been viewed 9,256 times.
If you feel lost in life, perhaps you need to redefine yourself before you begin to get back on track. Find out who you are now, understand how that person is different from the person you want to be, and then transform yourself and reach for the personal qualities and goals you desire. wish.
Steps
Define your current self
- Ask yourself what your values, goals, and desires are. You can start with a list or use a personal review to narrow down the list. [1] X Research Source
- Think about the top priorities in your life right now and see if it aligns with the person you want to be.
- Do not criticize yourself and avoid negative comments about yourself. That will not help you achieve your goals but will drag you down. [2] X Trusted Source Association for Psychpogical Science Go to Source
- To see how you’re spending your time, you can sketch out your schedule for a week, listing all of your activities and obligations.
- List your hobbies, special pastimes, etc.
- Think about what’s unusual about your schedule. For example, do you spend too little time on hobbies and interests that you consider very important? Are you spending too much time doing things you don’t love?
- Imagine that you are having a conversation at a party, in class, or in some other situation. Each participant in that dialogue represents a different part of who you are or a value you hold. [3] X Trusted Source Harvard Business Review Go to source Play that scene in mind; What will that conversation be like? How does it show compassion and love for yourself?
Leaving my old self
- Write down the things that let you down, or the things that are dragging you behind. When you express your feelings, you can let go of any unpleasant things in the past. This type of listing can help you learn the developmental skills you need to achieve a sense of satisfaction.
- Realize that no matter what you regret, you are somehow better than everyone else. Focus on the strengths and other positive things you have learned from your past.
- Analyze a relationship with a sad ending to determine what went wrong. Think about what you can do to prevent the same thing from happening to your future relationship.
- Review which decisions have led you or your family to financial mistakes in the past. [6] X Research Source Based on that, make a financial plan in the future to correct those mistakes.
- List the bad habits that are really bothering you. Narrow down to the few habits you’d most like to change, then start working on the most important.
- Focus on the positive feelings you first feel when trying to break a bad habit. [7] X Research Resources This can help you succeed.
- Try replacing a negative habit with a positive one. For example, if you have a habit of snacking on unhealthy snacks, you can replace it with a healthier one, or spend more time exercising.
- Identify the things that stress you out. Think about how you have reacted to them in the past.
- Then proactively replace negative thoughts about stressors with positive ones.
- For example, a bad boyfriend from the past can make you think like, “I’m not going to find anyone. I must have a problem.” Reframe yourself by thinking, “This love story doesn’t have a happy ending, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t the right person waiting for me. I just can’t find that person if I don’t keep looking.”
- You also need to identify and step away from the social pressures that come from society itself. Society may expect you to conform to certain standards based on your race, sex, economic background, or religion, and that only imposes limitations.
Moving forward
- Resolve to rearrange the way those priorities are executed so that they are worthy of their place in your eyes.
- Consider categorizing your priorities based on several categories: personal, financial, academic, etc. Then organize these categories to decide which goal you most want to achieve.
- Confident
- Leadership skills
- Self-help
- Sympathy
- Self-awareness
- Your plan might look like this:
- 1. Get a business wardrobe to wear even on days when free to wear.
- 2. Develop leadership skills by enrolling in classes and/or reading books.
- 3. Get a degree in business administration, even a PhD.
- 4. Try to develop communication skills by taking skills classes or reading books that include conflict management and resolution skills.
- 5. Learn to keep a “cool head”.
- Use this plan as a starting point. Find out what elements are needed to develop those skills, and expand your plan by adding additional steps.
- For example, you have a plan to improve your health through exercise. Instead of telling yourself, “I’ll start tomorrow” or “I’ll start next week,” start today. Practice a little bit each day (15 minutes for example), even if you’re not interested. Thereby working towards your goals will become a natural habit.
- Similarly, instead of wishing you had more time to pursue your creative side, set a schedule for it. Set a goal for how much time each month you want to spend on creative activity. Or, you can set a goal to complete a certain amount of creative work in a month, no matter how much time you spend on it.
Rewrite your definition of yourself
- Try a new dish you’ve never tried before.
- Visit a new city or country.
- Read a book on a topic unfamiliar to you.
- Watch a TV show you never thought of.
- Pick a hobby or a skill you’ve always wanted.
- If you once dreamed of becoming a chef, you can try to learn to cook, even if you have no intention of changing careers now.
- If you enjoyed playing basketball in high school, find an adult sports team and join. You can make friends and rekindle a sense of dedication, fitness, and teamwork.
- Make sure the new people in your life have a positive attitude. It will be much easier for you to pursue your journey of becoming a new person in the midst of a positive rather than negative atmosphere.
- Appreciate your current family and friends who can support you in reinventing yourself.
- Alternatively, you can reconnect with old friends via social media or meet-and-greet events, etc. [14] X Trusted Source Harvard Business Review Go to Source Contact Sometimes with the past is the best way to move forward.
This article was co-written by Lucy Yeh. Lucy Yeh is a licensed human resources director, recruiter and life coach with over 20 years of experience. With her experience as a life coach for the Mindfulness Stress Reduction (MBSR) program at InsighLA, Lucy has worked with professionals at all levels to enhance the quality of their careers, personal relationships/ expertise, self-marketing, and life balance.
There are 15 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This post has been viewed 9,256 times.
If you feel lost in life, perhaps you need to redefine yourself before you begin to get back on track. Find out who you are now, understand how that person is different from the person you want to be, and then transform yourself and reach for the personal qualities and goals you desire. wish.
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