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This article was co-written by Christina Jay, NLP. Christina Jay is a matchmaker and life coach based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Christina is the founder of Preferred Match (preferredmatch.ca), her company dedicated to finding love for successful and elite individuals. She has over 10 years of coaching experience, earned her NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) certification through the Canadian NLP Training Program and holds a bachelor’s degree in business administration from Brock University.
There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 9,148 times.
Friends can sometimes develop romantic feelings for each other, but it can be hard to tell if a female friend wants to be in a more distant relationship with you. There are a few signs you can look out for to confirm that your girlfriend likes you, such as being interested in her body language and conversations together.
Steps
Pay attention to her words
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Notice how she talks about future plans. When she shares what she wants to do with her life, career, or future in general, notice if she includes you in those plans. If so, chances are she likes you and has long made you a part of her life. [1] X Research Source
- Even if she doesn’t mention you, don’t worry. Maybe she’s afraid to talk about you in her plans without asking your permission first.
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Think about whether she asks you deep questions. Women are usually pretty good at getting to know other people because they know exactly what to ask. You should pay attention when she asks about your career plans, your ideal family, or your hopes and dreams. Those are all signals that help her see if your thoughts about the future are similar to hers. [2] X Research Source
- Listen to questions, such as “How many children do you want?” or “Do you believe in marriage?”
- Perhaps she will also ask questions about your relationship with your family, past relationships, or your beliefs.
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Ask yourself if you think she’s open-minded. Besides asking questions is answering questions! If she’s told you about her beliefs, love life, and family, then she’s really comfortable around you and sees you as someone you can trust. Even if this is normal between friends, it could be a sign that she’s ready for a closer relationship with you. [3] X Research Sources
- This is especially true if she shares with you stories that are significant, or even heartbreaking. If she’s comfortable talking about emotional topics around you, that’s a good sign that she sees you as her emotional support.
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Find out if she falters or gets nervous around you. Sometimes, you can determine if a girl likes you by observing the way she talks, in addition to the content of the conversation. If she goes off topic while looking at you, or seems confused, that’s a pretty sure sign that she likes you. [4] X Research Sources
- If she’s telling a cute story or funny joke, she’ll either blush when she looks at you, or forget what she said.
Observe actions that show affection
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Watch to see if she touches your hands, hair, or arms. A lingering touch is a surefire sign that a girl has a crush on you! If she touches your hand while talking, tries to straighten your hair, or pats your arm with her hand, she probably has feelings for you. [5] X Research Sources
- If you don’t like being touched, just let her know that this makes you uncomfortable and she should stop. If she is a good friend, she will respect your boundaries.
- Some women are just naturally too friendly. Notice if she touches everyone around her. If so, maybe she’s just a flirt!
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Notice if she’s interested in you. When women like someone, they usually do something else to help the other person. If she offers to help you with the chores, gives you a small gift, or cooks you dinner, she probably sees you as her ideal lover. [6] X Research Source
- If you like her too, thank her and work to repay her kindness by helping her in return!
- If you don’t like her, politely decline her offer of help, and thank her for being nice to you. You can say “Ah, I can do it myself, anyway thank you so much for asking me to help!”
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Notice if she smiles when she’s around you. Although she may laugh when she’s with other friends, notice if she’s always happy and giggling around you. Maybe she’s trying to flirt with you, or show that you make her happy! [7] X Research Sources
- Maybe she laughs when you make a joke, even if it’s not really funny. If she smiles when everyone is quiet, that’s a possible sign that she likes you.
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See if she notices and remembers what you say. While some women are good listeners, if she has feelings for you, she’ll go even further and remember what’s important to you. When she’s hanging out, she might say “Wow, that green shirt is so pretty, that’s your favorite color!” [8] X Research Sources
- If she’s particularly interested in you, perhaps she’ll give you a small gift that’s related to your hobby or a story you’ve told.
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Wait for her to introduce you to her family. It’s important for a woman to introduce her ideal lover to her family because it shows that she’s serious about her relationship with you. If she asks you to meet her family, or invites you to an event where her parents are also present, she definitely appreciates you! [9] X Research Source
- If you’re not ready for a serious relationship, politely decline the invitation. You could say, “I don’t think I’m ready to meet your parents right now, but I’m glad you invited me anyway.”
- She might invite you to dinner with her parents, or to a family event if you’ve known her parents since you’ve been friends for a while. This is also a pretty sure sign that she likes you, because you’ll be her “date” at an event or dinner.
Define your feelings
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Determine if you want the same things. One of the most important steps in transitioning from friendship to love is to decide if you feel the same way. Ask yourself if you’re ready for a serious relationship, and if you really like the way she is. Don’t put yourself in a situation you’ll regret later. [10] X Research Source
- It is also very important to determine what kind of relationship you want to have if you plan to confess to her. If you want to hang out like normal before making a serious commitment, say something like this clearly, “Do you want me to go on a date for a few days to see if we’re a good match?”
- If you’re only interested in a physical relationship, be honest with her. Some girls accept a “friendship-cum-sex” relationship, while others firmly refuse.
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Ask her out if you want to start a relationship. If she’s shown her feelings for you in some other way, go on a date with confidence. Always be polite and sincere about your intentions, and tell her how you feel. [11] X Research Source
- You can say “For me, you are a lovely and cute girl, I have liked you for a long time. Would you give me a chance to date?”
- If she agrees, get ready to make a good impression on the date.
- If she refuses, try not to get upset or discouraged. You two can still be friends, and you can try confessing to another cute girl in the future.
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Be honest with her if you don’t want to start a relationship. In some cases, you may be unattractive or not interested in dating a friend of yours. If you realize that maybe a girl friend likes you, the best thing you can do is make it clear that you only see her as a friend. [12] X Research Source
- To get the most out of your message, you could say, “I’ve noticed you’ve been behaving differently with me lately, so I wanted to talk about that right now. I really appreciate our friendship and I want nothing more than our friendship. I hope you understand what I mean.”
- She’ll probably be a little upset, but as long as you’re tactful and make it clear that you still want to be friends with her, everything will be fine.
Advice
- Sometimes, it’s easy to confuse flirting with friendliness. If she notices that she gets annoyed when you flirt, she’s probably just being nice to you as a friend.
- The best way to determine if she has feelings for you is to talk to her once you spot the signs that she might like you.
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This article was co-written by Christina Jay, NLP. Christina Jay is a matchmaker and life coach based in Toronto, Ontario, Canada. Christina is the founder of Preferred Match (preferredmatch.ca), her company dedicated to finding love for successful and elite individuals. She has over 10 years of coaching experience, earned her NLP (Neuro-linguistic Programming) certification through the Canadian NLP Training Program and holds a bachelor’s degree in business administration from Brock University.
There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 9,148 times.
Friends can sometimes develop romantic feelings for each other, but it can be hard to tell if a female friend wants to be in a more distant relationship with you. There are a few signs you can look out for to confirm that your girlfriend likes you, such as being interested in her body language and conversations together.
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