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This article was co-written by Liana Georgoulis, PsyD. Liana Georgoulis is a licensed clinical psychologist with over 10 years of experience, currently the clinical chair of Coast Psychpogical Services in Los Angeles. She received her Doctor of Psychology degree from Pepperdine University in 2009. Her clinic offers cognitive behavioral therapy and other evidence-based therapies for adolescents, adults, and couples. .
There are 18 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 3,789 times.
Confronting a psychopath can be scary, but there are ways you don’t fall victim to them. Psychopathy is an antisocial personality disorder, and is often defined by traits such as lack of empathy, defiance of rules, and impulsive behavior. If you cannot avoid contact with a psychopath, choose to face it calmly. Don’t get emotionally involved with them, because your distress shows they can control you. Call for help if you feel in danger, and learn to recognize the signs of emotional and physical abuse.
Steps
End your relationship with a psychopath
- Not all people with oppositional disorder are violent, but aggression and defiance may be involved.
- Suicide threats can be a tactic to manipulate your emotions. If you believe the person intends and will injure themselves, call for help from emergency services.
- If you suspect they are threatening suicide to control you or have repeated this self-harm, stay within your boundaries. Tell them you can’t be held accountable for their actions and won’t let them control you. [2] X Trusted Source National Domestic Vipence Hotline Go to source
- You should remember that psychopaths often look very friendly and gracious at first. For the first few weeks they can be very attractive, but then you will notice the warning signs. For example, they may disappear for days, and when you question them, they overreact, threaten violence, and say that whatever they do has nothing to do with you.
- Also, remember that you are not alone. A person with psychopathic tendencies often disregards the health of others and treats them like objects. Remind yourself that you’re not the only one who’s been treated this way.
- You may be hesitant because you still like the person when they act nice. However, ask yourself if the person is only being nice when they want you to do something for them. For example, what if they ask you to take you somewhere and you do not agree? If they get angry then, chances are they’re just pretending to be sweet to take advantage of you.
- Remember that psychopaths do not necessarily cause terror. They may often blame you, lie, take advantage, be suddenly aggressive, or don’t care about your physical and mental health, listen to your intuition when the subject shows these signs. that present.
- For example, you can redecorate your home so that the surrounding environment is no longer associated with your manipulator. You can also set limits such as not living together or sharing a bank account with a new lover until you go through some therapy. [5] X Research Sources
- Remember that you always have the right to refuse. You don’t have to explain, and no one can force you to change your mind.
- Making sure to set boundaries can protect the future of your physical, emotional, and financial well-being.
- Don’t go to their social media pages, suppress the urge to call or text, and don’t allow yourself to regret your decision to break up. If this person is the cause of all emotional, verbal, or financial abuse in your life, then they should be removed from your life.
- Breaking up isn’t easy, but be strong and don’t feel guilty. Know that you’re not abandoning them, you’re just protecting yourself.
- Remember that you are not their counselor or therapist, and you cannot force them to change. A person with ODD cannot be changed without professional intervention, but most people with symptoms of the disorder refuse treatment. [7] X Trusted Source PubMed Central Go to Source
- Remember important phone numbers and, if possible, buy a backup phone that the other person cannot reach. Before you leave, pack up all your important paperwork and, if it’s safe, transfer all your money and savings to a new account.
- Get a spare car key and hide them in a safe place.
- Arrange accommodation with friends or family members. If you don’t have a trusted friend or relative living with you locally, you can get a ride at a domestic violence center.
- Ask a trusted friend or family member to accompany you for emotional support.
- You do not need an attorney to request a protection order, nor do you have to pay any filing fees.
- Give them the home and business address of your abuser, as well as other evidence such as prescriptions, photos, or police reports.
- You can also find support groups designed to assist victims of emotional or physical abuse.
Dealing with Psychopaths at Work and School
- Think back to why that person is telling, gossiping, or explaining this and that. Check their stories when you can. You can bring in a friend or colleague to ask, or check out what they have to say online. If you don’t get a chance to check, then listen to your gut.
- Let’s say they tell you that a coworker is talking bad about you behind your back. Ask yourself: “What was their motivation for telling that story? What will they get? How to check this information? Do they care about their own interests or just want to cause conflict?”.
- Do your best to see the motive behind their grace and sweetness. Remember what they were like when they weren’t using that attraction to achieve their goals. Ask yourself, “What will they gain from me by trying so hard to please me?”.
- For example, don’t pay attention to their compliments if they later want to borrow money or ask you to do something. You can say “Sorry, I have my own rules when it comes to lending money to friends, family, or co-workers”, or “Sorry, I have a lot of work to do and can’t take on more of this project for you.” .
- If you believe you are in danger, talk to your teacher or school counselor if you are of school age. For issues at work, raise concerns with human resources, or if your company doesn’t have one, raise them with your manager.
- If you are a teacher and are facing such a student, do not rush to intervene in behavior that violates school rules. First clarify that the student is in violation, notify them of the consequences, and contact higher-level support for obvious violations. [14] X Research Source
- For example, if they do something wrong but blame you, don’t scream, “Liar! You’re the one who caused it.”
- Instead, stay calm: “I understand you think I’m wrong.” If an authority figure such as a manager or teacher is present, act rationally, and present evidence that it is not your fault.
- While the best thing you can do is avoid the troublesome person, that doesn’t always work. The job may require you to work closely with the person, or they will find a way to meet you at work or school on their own.
- With help from an authority figure or transferring schools, changing jobs are big options, but may be necessary if you become the subject of psychological, verbal, or physical abuse.
Identify the signs of a psychopath
- Remember that if a person steals a candy bar or runs a red light, it doesn’t mean they are psychopaths. There is a difference between breaking the common law and the unrepentant, consistent, unrepentant disregard for the norm.
- Remember, a night of getting drunk or driving around doesn’t make a person psychopathic. Antisocial personality disorder is a very complex group of behavioral patterns. Only a mental health professional trained in abnormal psychology and experienced with psychopaths can make an accurate diagnosis.
- You may have a hunch that things are not going well or that you are disconnected from the reality around you. If you believe you are the victim of some form of mental or emotional manipulation, seek the help of a trusted loved one or mental health professional to help you regain objective awareness.
- A psychopath will manipulate other people’s emotions to get what they want, maintain control, because they like it or to play the victim. [21] X Trusted Source PubMed Central Go to Source
- Being vigilant doesn’t mean paranoid that danger is lurking in every social situation, but heeding the cues and listening to instincts. If someone makes you feel bad, leave and go to a safe, bright, crowded location.
- Let a friend know the location before going on a date with someone. Don’t give out information to strangers, and don’t lend them money or give them access to valuables.
- As the relationship progresses, see the first time they lie, break a promise, or shirk responsibility as a misunderstanding. Be suspicious when it happens a second time and cut off ties if it happens a third time . [23] X Research source
- It’s important to distinguish between psychological terms and moral judgment, but remember you have the right to refuse to contact the person who mistreats or abuses you.
- Mental health conditions are not an excuse for human behavior. The extent to which someone with antisocial personality disorder can control their behavior is still a complex and controversial topic, but you don’t have to suffer if you’re treated badly.
Advice
- Dealing with a friend or loved one with a serious mental illness is not easy. A counselor can help you understand their illness and provide strategies for avoiding harmful situations. [25] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to Source
- Not everyone with antisocial personality disorder behaves violently. However, anger outbursts and defiant actions are one of the defining characteristics, do not take any threats of violence, emotional or verbal abuse lightly. [26] X Trusted Source PubMed Central Go to Source
- About 3% of the population may have antisocial personality disorder, and it occurs in all economies and societies. Psychopaths, as opposed to antisocial, are better able to function and have fewer unusual violent outbursts. [27] X Research Source
This article was co-written by Liana Georgoulis, PsyD. Liana Georgoulis is a licensed clinical psychologist with over 10 years of experience, currently the clinical chair of Coast Psychpogical Services in Los Angeles. She received her Doctor of Psychology degree from Pepperdine University in 2009. Her clinic offers cognitive behavioral therapy and other evidence-based therapies for adolescents, adults, and couples. .
There are 18 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 3,789 times.
Confronting a psychopath can be scary, but there are ways you don’t fall victim to them. Psychopathy is an antisocial personality disorder, and is often defined by traits such as lack of empathy, defiance of rules, and impulsive behavior. If you cannot avoid contact with a psychopath, choose to face it calmly. Don’t get emotionally involved with them, because your distress shows they can control you. Call for help if you feel in danger, and learn to recognize the signs of emotional and physical abuse.
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