How to Overcome Obsessions

Being haunted is like being trapped in a tunnel: you lose your ability to see and notice anything other than the object that haunts you. The phobia becomes a part of everyday life, maybe it is related to the fear; Obsession is different from addiction, the state when one never feels satisfied unless indulged in the object of addiction. ^{[1] X Research Resources} Overcoming a phobia is not easy, but once you learn how to stop growing your obsession and channel your energies into new people and interests, you will achieve free. Read Step 1 to learn how to control your phobia so it doesn’t affect your thoughts and actions.

Table of Contents

Freeing the Mind

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Keep your distance from the source of the obsession. When you’re obsessed with someone or something, if you’re around them, you can’t think of anything else. The closer you are to the obsession, the harder it is to stop thinking about it. Creating physical distance between you and your obsession will help you create a mental distance. It will be difficult at first, but gradually you will feel the obsession fade away day by day.

Being obsessed with someone is a sign of an unhealthy relationship. You should limit contact with the person you are obsessed with. Distract yourself with other things, find ways to focus on more interesting things. ^{[2] X Research Source}
Maybe you’re obsessed with times in the past, like playing your favorite video game. In that case, you need to get this game out of sight by uninstalling it on your computer or asking a friend to keep the console until you get over the obsession.

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Stop nurturing. Nurturing an obsession can be a little comforting, but it’s hard to break the habit. Just thinking about the source of your obsession puts you in control. To break it, you have to exhaust it. For example, if you are obsessed with a famous person, stop talking about that person with your friends. Stop looking at Twitter and imagine you’re dating them. The more space you give to that obsession, the faster it will “swallow” you. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

Stop cultivating obsessions is not easy. You will find yourself going through a psychological game, such as telling yourself to look at someone’s Facebook page one last time before stopping this obsession. But if you want to limit it, you have to get rid of it as soon as you are most obsessive.
Sometimes the obsession is so strong that you can’t get rid of it. No matter how hard you try, the thoughts of the obsession will always be there. In that case, don’t push yourself too hard, you should go through it step by step.

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Distract yourself from obsessive thoughts. The time is right to think and discuss topics you like, so why stop? Remember that you want to get over your obsession: you can get over it and enjoy the fun things in life. When the obsessive thought comes up, distract yourself so you don’t remember it anymore. ^{[4] X Research Resources} Here are some good ways to distract yourself:

Exercise to get your brain active. Jogging or walking may not be the right choice because you will have time to think about the obsession. You should choose mountain climbing, caving or playing sports that require both body and brain activity.
Fiction keeps you distracted. Choose to read a new book or watch a movie that has nothing to do with your obsession.
For now, when your thoughts are clouded and in urgent need of distraction, try turning on some music, calling a friend (talking about anything but an obsession), reading the newspaper, or getting back to work.

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Focus on the things you forget. When you are obsessed and don’t have time for other things, such as focusing on work, relationships or personal interests. You should spend time on other things in life so that you don’t have time to think about that obsession anymore.

Fixing a relationship you’ve neglected is an effective way to get over your obsession. Friends and family will be glad when you come back, they will provide some good and interesting ideas, problems or related situations. Thinking about change is a positive thing!
Many people choose to bury their head in work to forget the obsession. Whatever your job is, just focus on doing the best you can.

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Learn to live in the present . Are you a dreamer? Do you waste hours thinking about the person or something that haunts you? When you sit in one place but your mind is elsewhere, you miss what is happening. If you are ready to overcome your obsession, you must practice paying attention. That is, focusing on the present, instead of thinking about the past and future.

Use your senses and feel everything around you. What do you smell, see, hear and taste in the present? Pay attention to what’s happening right in front of you instead of what’s happening in another time period.
Listen to the other person when talking. Let yourself feel the conversation instead of letting your mind float in the clouds.
You can use mantras to help you focus when you have a haunting thought. Repeating simple sentences like “Breathe”, “Connect Now” or “I am here” helps bring your thoughts back to the present. ^{[5] X Research Sources}

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Use Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy (CBT). This therapy suggests that there is no way to stop thinking about the obsession, but it does weaken the link between the obsessive thought and the daily trigger. Make it easy to deal with life and think in action; you will control phobia more easily. ^{[6] X Research Sources}

CBT is used to develop words or actions to “smash” obsessive thoughts and allow you to focus on other things. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

Forming New Habits

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Strengthen relationships with others. If you are obsessed with someone then spending time with someone else is the best way to change. All the energy put into the object of your obsession will be devoted to getting to know another person. Sign up for a class, socialize at the pet park, or make new friends. Becoming close to others helps you realize there’s more to the world than your obsession.

Avoid comparing the new person to the person who is obsessed with you. Try to enjoy each person’s unique personality instead of comparing them.
Even if the obsession isn’t a person, there are many benefits to meeting new friends. They’ll introduce you to perspectives and thoughts you’ve never thought of before.

READ More: How to Be Socially Confident

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Pursue new interests. “Try something new” seems to be the solution to all problems because it really works. Learning new skills or getting better at activities can activate your brain and create a change in perspective, which can help you get out of your rut. Don’t let your obsession control you by spending time on something else, anything unrelated to the obsession. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

For example, if you are obsessed with someone who hates going to art museums and watching foreign movies, now is your chance to join those activities.
If you are obsessed with a particular subject, try to find something completely different to change.

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Change your daily habits. If obsessions are affecting your habits, such as commuting to work on the same old road you used to take with an ex, now is the time to change things up. True reflection of the present: what habits do you need to break in order not to become obsessed? You can totally answer this question. Make a real effort to change your habits—it’s hard at first, but you’ll notice the change soon enough. Here are some changes that can help clear your mind:

Take a different route to school or work
Work out at a different club or go to practice another day to avoid meeting the person who haunts you.
Instead of checking your email and favorite websites as soon as you wake up, start your day by meditating, going for a walk, or taking your dog for a walk.
Go to another place to exercise on the weekend
Listen to other music while working

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Refresh life. If you’re tired of being obsessed with controlling your thoughts and habits, take back control by making personal changes. It sounds like a big deal, but sometimes you need to change things up to show that you can still do it. Pick something related to the obsession and refresh it.

Maybe for you, refreshing means changing your appearance. If you grow your hair long because you think the person who is obsessed with you likes it, then why not change? Cut your hair short or change your style that has nothing to do with the other person.
If you spend time visiting a website, it may be time to refresh your room or office. Rearrange furniture and buy new things. Clear the desk and hang more pictures. Get rid of things that remind you of something you don’t want to think about, and surround yourself with things that are encouraging.

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Talk to a specialist. Sometimes the obsession is so great that you can’t overcome it on your own. If you can’t control your obsession and it’s affecting your happiness, make an appointment with a therapist. A counselor can give you the tools to regain control of your thoughts and life.

If you have repetitive thoughts or actions, you may have an anxiety disorder called obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD). ^{[9] X Trusted Source National Institute of Mental Health Go to the source} In this case, it is important to talk to get help with specific therapies and medications for this syndrome.

Turn Obsessions into Positives

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Turn it into something productive. Not all phobias are scary; in fact, many people spend their entire lives searching for their “passion”—something ingrained in them that makes them eager to learn and work harder. If your obsession helps you achieve your goals, then this is really lucky. For example, if you are passionate about astronomy and you just want to spend time reading and learning about it, you can turn your obsession into a successful career.

Even if an obsession isn’t as dramatic as a master’s degree or as an astronomer, you can still turn it into something productive. Maybe you’re obsessed with celebrity gossip, you just can’t stop reading the tabloids. Why not set up a blog or Twitter account to share what you’ve learned?
You can use obsessions as motivation to improve yourself. If you’re obsessed with someone who isn’t like you, you can change the bad habits that are holding you back. Let your obsession be your excuse to get up early, run before you go to work, or read the entire document ahead of time to speak up in class.

Advice

Try new things to clear your mind of obsessions like going out with friends, reading a book, or learning to play an instrument.
Don’t just run away and deal with the obsession.
Do it slowly if necessary. You don’t have to terminate it “blatantly”.
Don’t be afraid or ashamed.
Take this as a challenge and overcome it!

Warning

Obsessive-compulsive disorder and addiction are two ongoing problems with many people. If you cannot control your phobia or it is harming you and those around you, you should seek professional help immediately.

Steps

Freeing the Mind

Forming New Habits

Turn Obsessions into Positives

Advice

Warning

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