How to Improve Social Skills

A healthy, happy and joyful life has a very important contribution of good social skills. They are also essential elements in almost every field of study and work. Studies have shown a positive link between social skills and mental health. ^{[1] X Research Resources} Even if you think you’re an introvert, this wikiHow article will give you practical advice on how to improve your social skills.

Table of Contents

Improve verbal communication skills

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Note the volume and tone of your voice. Do not speak too softly or too loudly. You need to speak just enough for everyone to hear and show confidence but not aggression.

Remember to adjust the volume to suit your surroundings.
If possible, adjust your voice to match the people around you.

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Learn how to start a conversation properly. You can start a conversation with something that is considered fact or truth. Comment on the weather or a news event that you recently heard in the news. Compliment someone’s outfit or hairstyle. ^{[2] X Source of Research} However, socializing is not always easy, as it is often difficult to think of exactly what to say. Here are some examples:

“The hat is so beautiful, where did you buy it”?
“Why is the weather so weird?”
“The view from here is amazing.”
“Teacher Que’s class is interesting, isn’t it?”

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Learn how to conduct a conversation. After talking about general issues such as ongoing events, try bringing up the topics that are closer or more related by asking questions that go a little deeper. Polite questions about family, occupation, or hobbies can broaden the conversation and make it more meaningful. Remember that a conversation involves two people, so you should avoid talking too little or vice versa. Try to ask open-ended questions as much as possible; In other words, ask questions that include words like “how,” “why,” or “what” instead of asking questions to which the other person might simply respond with “Yes.” ” or “No” which does not encourage the other person to talk further. Here are a few ways to start the conversation:

“So what are you doing?”
“Tell me more about your family.”
“How did you know the host of this party?”
“How long have you been on this diet program?”
“What are your plans this weekend?”

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Avoid sensitive topics. There are some topics you should avoid when interacting with people you don’t know very well. Generally speaking, these are controversial topics such as religion, politics or race/ethnicity, etc. For example:

While you can ask the other person about the upcoming election, asking who they plan to vote for can be frustrating.
You can ask about someone’s religion in general, but asking the church’s stance on gender issues might not be a good idea.

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End the conversation politely. Instead of abruptly ending the conversation and walking away, try to be polite. Politely tell them you have to go and show them that you enjoyed the conversation. ^{[3] X Research Source} You can try using positive statements like:

“I have to go now, hopefully we’ll see you soon.”
“I have an appointment with the bank so I have to go now, nice to talk to you.”
“I feel like you’re busy so I don’t dare to keep you. Talking to you is fun.”

Improve non-verbal communication skills

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Pay attention to body language. Our gestures often convey stronger messages than words. ^{[4] X Research Source} Remember that body language plays an important role in social communication. Take note and spend time pondering the messages you convey to others through your posture, eye contact, and facial expressions.

If you avoid eye contact, stand at a distance, or fold your arms over your chest, others may understand that you don’t want contact. ^{[5] X Research Sources}
Show a confident posture and smile a little more, make regular eye contact with the person you’re talking to, stand up straight and keep your arms relaxed. This is sure to make a good impression on the person you’re talking to.

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Observe how others behave in social situations. Pay close attention to their body language and think about why they are so good at communicating with people. Observe their posture, gestures, facial expressions, and eye contact. Think about how you can imitate them or improve your body language while talking.

Find out how “well” the people you are observing know each other. This is important because body language between close friends is different than when you’re talking to a complete stranger, even in casual situations.
Keep in mind what you see and observe. This will guide and help you pay attention to your body language.

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Improve nonverbal communication skills at home. Home is the best place to start learning something new, because a familiar environment won’t scare you. You can try recording yourself when communicating with family members and consider how you can improve your body language. You can also practice gesturing in front of a mirror; mobilize the support of close family members, even close friends. This is an effective method, as you will get helpful and honest feedback that may not be available from others. A few other tips include: bringing your shoulders back, keeping your spine straight, and lifting your chin parallel to the ground.

One of the biggest advantages of working out at home is the privacy and low-pressure environment.
Don’t be shy! It’s just you and the mirror here! Feel free to try different expressions and gestures.

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Focus on keeping a genuine smile as soon as you meet the other person. Everyone knows that a smile is a great way to show openness to others and make people feel good. Just putting on a smile when meeting people will make things easier. ^{[6] X Research Source}

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Practice eye contact. Practice making more eye contact once you’re comfortable with it. Don’t make eye contact, especially when you’re uncomfortable, because this can be uncomfortable. You should only look into the other person’s eyes for 3-5 seconds. As you make this easier, gradually making eye contact will become natural to you.

When you’re not sitting right next to someone, look at their ear or the spot between their eyes. This is pretending to make eye contact, but people won’t notice the difference.
If you’re afraid of making eye contact, some social psychologists recommend practicing it with the television. Open a news program and try looking into the eyes of a TV announcer. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

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Take a little extra time to get ready when you’re ready to head out. You will feel more confident with your appearance. Any social situation becomes easier if you take a little extra time to look decent and feel confident. Get in the habit of doing personal hygiene, buying some new clothes or your favorite pair of shoes; Good clothes not only boost your confidence but also help you look more sociable in a natural way.

Real life practice

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Find a place where the people there seem approachable. Starting a conversation with someone you don’t know in this place seems less risky and more acceptable. Some situations are easier than others, especially when you’re starting to socialize. Usually supermarkets or banks are inappropriate places to start a conversation with complete strangers (people only go there to buy food). On the contrary, cafes, sporting events, and community centers are great places to strike up a conversation with interesting new people.

To meet new people, you can join groups like amateur sports clubs or book clubs. Fitness classes are also often a great place to start a conversation.

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Start small, talk to the waiters to start the practice. Ask the bartender how that day was. Thank the postman when they drop by or ask a colleague about their weekend. You don’t have to dig into the conversation right away. Let’s start with short conversations. Remember that saying hello to someone won’t do any harm. It’s very unlikely that you’ll see them again, and casual greetings are the best practice. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

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Choose someone who doesn’t seem indifferent or busy. Approach your subject with open body language and show an interest in getting to know them. This is often a good opportunity to start a meaningful conversation.

Confident when approaching others. If you worry too much, the other person will worry too!
Remember to put your phone away. The act of keeping your eyes on your phone during a conversation will make people uncomfortable and they will think that you prefer the phone to them!

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Think about the past conversation. If the conversation goes well, make a note of what you did right and try again next time. If things don’t go well, reassess the situation to see exactly what you didn’t do well.

Have you approached someone who seems busy or has closed body language?
Is your body language open and approachable?
Do you open the conversation with an appropriate topic?

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Talk more with people. Your social skills will gradually improve with practice. The more you communicate and interact with people, the better you will do.

Try not to let negative social interactions discourage you. Usually such encounters are not your fault.

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Join a support group. A support group is often a safe and comfortable environment for you to learn to talk to. You’re not the only one going there to practice your speaking skills. What are you waiting for if you don’t practice with fellow boaters? The very fact that you want to improve your social skills shows that you are open and willing to practice with them. Reach out to people who have the same goals as you for support. ^{[9] X Research Source}

Advice

For people with social anxiety and mental health issues that make communicating with others difficult, recent studies have shown that group therapy focuses on coaching. Social skills can have a positive effect. ^{[10] X Research Source}
If you’ve been diagnosed with social anxiety, consider finding group therapy opportunities in your community. ^{[11] X Research Source}
Always try to be sober, and at the same time keep your voice polite and courteous. A smiling attitude certainly won’t hurt anyone.
Invite people to talk in a group; People will begin to notice a change in your behavior and will gradually respect you.
Always be polite, and trust that respectful interactions can teach you much as you strive to set an example for others.
Never forget that experience is the best teacher!

Warning

Be careful with body contact. Some people may be open to touch and physical contact, but others find this inappropriate, even uncomfortable. You should first create a familiarity, then just pat them on the shoulder or high five.
Drinking or using drugs may temporarily boost your confidence, but it won’t improve your social skills in the long run.
Social skills are culturally relevant. Remember that what you observe in Western society may not be accepted elsewhere, especially in developing countries, where people tend to be conservative and have high values. and moral differences.

Steps

Improve verbal communication skills

Improve non-verbal communication skills

Real life practice

Advice

Warning

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