How to Get Willpower

Willpower, also known as self-discipline, self-control or determination, is the ability to control behavior, emotions, and focus. ^{[1] X Duckworth Research Source , AL (2011). The significance of self-contrp. Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, (7). 2639. doi:10.1073/pnas.1019725108} Willpower refers to the ability to resist impulses, eliminate immediate desire to achieve goals, and the ability to control unwanted thoughts, feelings, or emotions. impulsivity, and self-control. A person’s level of willpower can determine a person’s ability to save for financial stability, opt for positive mental and physical health, and avoid substance use or abuse. ^{[2] X Research Source Moffitt TE, et al. (2011). A gradient of childhood self-contrp predicts health, wealth, and public safety. Proc Natl Acad Sci USA 108:2693–2698. doi: 10.1073/pnas.1010076108} You can move towards your goals and build willpower by continuing to try to eliminate cravings immediately to control desires. This habit builds impulse control, just as exercise helps build muscle over time. ^{[3] X Research Sources Oaten, M., & Cheng, K. (2006). Longitudinal gains in self-regulation from physical exercise. British Journal of Health Psychpogy,11, 717-733}

Table of Contents

Set Behavior Goals

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Evaluate your habits. If you’re trying to increase your willpower, it’s likely that you have a lack of control over impulses that negatively affect a part of your life. Some people fight life with their will, while for many others willpower is their “weakness”. Identify the areas that need improvement first if there are a lot of things to fix because you should only focus on one part at a time.

For example, you may find it difficult to make up your mind to eat. This affects your overall health and quality of life.
For example, you may have difficulty controlling your spending habits, so you can’t save money to buy things you use often for the “big” occasion.

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Create a measure of willpower. Create your own measure of willpower. You can measure it on a scale of 1-10, 1 being completely immersed in the things you want to avoid, and 10 being strict adherence to the draconian rules you set for yourself. Or you can do a simpler metric in the form of “nothing, a little, more, a lot”. Measures can take many forms, but it is an opportunity for you to evaluate yourself.

For example, if you find yourself stocking up on sweets and fast food every day, you might rate yourself 1 or 2 on a 1-10 scale.
If you’re in the mood to buy things you don’t need because they’re on sale, or you shop online and buy unnecessary things just because you’re bored, you can rate yourself “nothing” on the internet. the will to refrain from shopping.

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Set long-term goals for change. The first step to self-improvement is to set a change goal. Goals should be clear, specific and achievable. If the goal is ambiguous and cannot be measured, it will be difficult to determine the progress towards the goal.

For example, a vague eating-related goal is “eating healthier.” It’s healthier than it sounds generic, so it’s hard to pinpoint when you’ll hit the “healthier” finish. You can set more specific goals like “lose 20 kg by eating healthy”, “fit into a number 8” or “eliminate sugar dependence”.
The vague goal of spending is “spend less”. Again, this goal is unclear and cannot be assessed. You should have more specific goals like “save 10% of your salary”, “deposit 60 million VND” or “pay off your credit card debt”.

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Set short-term sub-goals. One of the most effective ways to accomplish big (seemingly overwhelming) goals is to set short-term goals that act as guides over the long haul. Short-term goals also need to be specific, measurable, and lead you to the ultimate long-term goal.

For example, if you are trying to lose 20 kg, you can make your first short term goal “lose 5 kg”, “exercise 3 times per week”, “limit dessert to 1 time per week”. “.
If you are trying to save VND 60 million, you can set a short-term goal of “save 10 million VND”, “limit the number of times you eat out to 2 times per week”, “watch movies at home instead”. for the theater”.

Delay Desire

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Always keep the “big picture” in mind. The best way to “train” your willpower is to be willing to sacrifice your current desires for the long-term benefit. In the end, the reward you get can be “healthy living” or “financial stability,” but to learn how to exercise willpower, it’s best to offer a specific reward.

For example, if you are in the process of losing weight, trying to control your eating habits, the ultimate reward may be to buy a whole new set of clothes to fit your body size.
If you’re controlling your shopping habits, you can offer the ultimate reward an expensive item that you haven’t saved up for before. For example, you could buy a bigger TV or go on a vacation to a tropical island with friends.

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Get rid of lust instantly. This is the essence of cultivating willpower. When you feel tempted to impulsively, you realize that what you really want is just an instant feeling of desire. If the impulsive behavior is contrary to the goal, you will feel guilty after indulging yourself in that desire.

To counter the impulse of instant lust, try these steps:
- Take note of what you want to do
- Tell yourself you’re just looking for instant lust
- Remind yourself of your long-term and short-term goals
- Ask yourself if giving in to this urge is worth it, it could compromise your ultimate goal.
For example, if you’re struggling to control your cravings and you’re standing in front of a tray of cookies at a party:
- Admit that you want one (or five) cookies
- Notice that the cookie will satisfy your current hunger or impulse
- Remind yourself that you are on track to lose 20 kg and the reward is a new wardrobe
- Ask yourself if the temporary gratification of eating cookies is worth it for you to derail your work and risk losing your new wardrobe when it’s all over.

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Give yourself small rewards along the way. Motivation or rewards won’t change your willpower, they just help you to be more confident on the road to success. Because it will take a long time to reach the final big reward, you can reward yourself with smaller rewards that act as “guides” in the progress.

For example, if you have a weekly food selection, you can choose your favorite dishes on the weekend. Alternatively, you can reward yourself with something that doesn’t involve food, such as a manicure or a massage.
If you’re in control of your spending, you can reward yourself with a gift for saving. For example, every time you save 10 million VND, you can use 1 million to spend as much as you want.

Monitoring Progress

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Keep a willpower journal. Write down your impulse control efforts, including successful and unsuccessful attempts to increase willpower. Be sure to write down details to help you evaluate the situation later.

For example, you could write something like this: “Today I ate 5 cookies at a party at work. I’ve been fasting for lunch so I feel hungry. There were a lot of people there, Trang made cookies and she kept asking me to eat more.”
Another example: “Today I went to the mall with my husband to buy new jeans for my son, and I held back the idea of buying a dress even though it was on sale. I just bought a pair of pants and left.”

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Comment on factors that influence the decision you make. You can write down details of a situation where you struggled or succumbed to impulses of behavior, commenting on the thoughts in your head. You can add emotions, companions, and locations. ^{[4] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source}

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Find common ground in your behavior. After writing a few pages of your diary, you should read it again and find common ground in your behavior. Ask yourself a few questions:

Do I make better decisions when I’m alone or when I have people around?
Is there a specific character that is the “switch” of my impulsive behavior? ^{[5] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source}
Do your emotions (frustration, anger, joy, etc) influence impulsive behavior?
Is there a particular time of day when you find it difficult to control impulsive behavior (such as late at night?)

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Consider choosing a visual representation of your progress. This may sound silly, but people often respond more positively when there is a specific visual representation of progress. If you can see how far you’ve come and still have to go, it will help keep you motivated.

For example, if you are trying to lose 20 kg, you can put a coin in a glass jar every time you lose weight. As you watch the increasing number of coins in the jar as you lose weight, you’ll know your progress.
If you’re trying to save money, you can draw a thermometer and color it to show how much money is being saved; When you reach the top, you have reached the goal. (This method is often used to observe the fundraising process.)

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Find the method that works for you. Using journaling or thinking about the success or failure of impulse control, you will find the method that works best for you. You may find that offering weekly rewards works; or you need visual objects to focus more; or assessing willpower on a scale would be more appropriate. You find that being alone, going to a particular place, or being with someone triggers impulsive behavior. Tailor your willpower approach to your needs and situation.

Run away or Face Failure

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Be aware that stress can be a barrier to progress. No matter what the specific goal is, stress from work or life can derail your progress. You need to use stress-relieving skills like exercising, getting enough sleep, and taking time to rest.

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Find ways to avoid temptation. Sometimes the best way to deal with temptation is to avoid it. If you don’t feel like you have the willpower to resist impulsive behavior, then try eliminating the opportunity for them to appear. This also means avoiding people or environments that put you in an impulsive state. ^{[6] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to the source} This is not a permanent solution but can help you in certain situations or just getting started.

For example, if you have trouble with impulses to eat, you need to clean up the kitchen and keep the food out of unhealthy foods. Get rid of anything that doesn’t fit the requirements of your new eating habits and throw them away.
If you’re trying not to splurge, cash is probably better than a credit card. Or you can leave the house without money if you feel helpless with this spending habit. If there’s a place that acts as a trigger switch, like a mall, avoid going here. If you need something, ask someone else to buy it for you.

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Use “if-then” thinking. An if-then statement will help you know how to react when tempted. ^{[7] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to the source} You can “practice” how to react in a situation by imagining what is about to happen. This can help you when you are in a tempting situation.

For example, if you know you’re going to a party with a lot of cookies, you could use the if-then statement “If Trang offers me cookies, then I will politely decline ‘your cake is delicious but but your cake is delicious. I’m on a diet, thanks’ and went to the other side of the room.
If you’re trying to control spending, you can use an if-then statement like, “If I see something I like on sale in the mall, I’ll write down the product name and price out and back home. If I still want to buy it the next day, I will ask my husband to buy it for me.”

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Seek treatment. If you’re trying to control impulses on your own but it’s not working, you should seek treatment. A therapist can provide specific support and advice for behavior modification. They can determine if there is a deeper problem driving your impulsive behavior.

Some doctors specialize in impulse control and cognitive behavioral therapy that can be effective in treating people dealing with impulsive or addictive behavior. ^{[8] X Research Sources}
Some impulsive behavior patterns or willpower issues can be helped by a habit reversal strategy, replacing the unwanted habit (such as eating a cookie whenever you see it) with other habits, habits more consistent with desires (such as drinking water). ^{[9] X Research Source}

Steps

Set Behavior Goals

Delay Desire

Monitoring Progress

Run away or Face Failure

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