How to Get Rid of Negative Thoughts

Surely you will be surprised to know the fact that all of us have negative thoughts, they are part of human evolution. We are programmed to scan our surroundings, look for problems that need fixing, and expend a lot of mental energy considering the worst-case scenario. Negative thoughts are only disturbing when we begin to believe them. ^{[1] X Research Source} Fortunately, by combining a variety of strategies, you can quell negative thinking and learn to think more optimistically.

Table of Contents

Identifying and Challenging Negative Thinking

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Identify your negative thoughts. Tests for negative thinking and anxiety by assessing patterns of cognitive distortion, in other words, identifying separate or unreliable thoughts. Some forms of cognitive distortion include: ^{[2] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source}

All-or-nothing thinking : Extreme “all-or-nothing” thinking. You always see things as good or bad, wrong or right, with no complexity or mediocrity. ^{[3] X Research Sources}
Over-generalizing : Turning a negative experience into an immutable “rule”. These thoughts often take the form of “You always…”, “I never…”, or “Everybody…” ^{[4] X Research Source}
Psychological screening : Screen all the positive elements of the situation and leave only the negative ones. For example, when you have a great date, but you only focus on the shyness of silence at the beginning of the date. ^{[5] X Research Sources}
Rushing to conclusions : Drawing negative conclusions for yourself and not giving relevant evidence, such as concluding that you know what other people think or what will happen in the future. ^{[6] X Research Sources}
Take the problem seriously : Always think the worst case and “inflate” small problems. ^{[7] X Research Sources}
Emotional Reasoning : Believing that one’s current emotions reflect actual objects. When you feel pitiful, the current situation will get worse. ^{[8] X Research Sources}
“Should” and “shouldn’t” : Saying that you should or shouldn’t do something and think that others prefer or dislike doing it. ^{[9] X Research Source}
Labeling : Labeling yourself or others based solely on a behavior despite ample evidence against it. ^{[10] X Research Source}
Personalization : Take full responsibility for yourself in cases beyond your control. For example, if you are preparing a party and it suddenly starts to rain even though the forecast says it will be sunny, you blame yourself for the bad weather. ^{[11] X Research Source}
Amplify and minimize : You undervalue the positives of yourself while exalting others. When someone praises you, you refuse. ^{[12] X Research Source}

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Take note of negative thoughts. You should keep a “thought diary” for easy tracking. When you have a negative thought, open a new page and follow these steps: ^{[13] X Research Source}

Record the triggering event, thought, or situation. ^{[14] X Research Source} Example: “I raised my voice to my lover before going to work this morning.”
Record negative thoughts or beliefs during and after the incident. Ask yourself: “What was I thinking?”. “What do I say to myself?” and “What thought popped into my head at that moment?”. ^{[15] X Research Source} Example: “I ruined it. It’s the end of a relationship. He’s tired of pleasing me and doesn’t love me anymore, he’s going to break up with me.”
Write words that describe how you feel and underline the word that best describes the event. ^{[16] X Research Source} Example: “fear, loneliness, hurt” and underline the word “fear”.
Check the page you just wrote to see if you can identify your unhelpful thinking patterns. ^{[17] X Research Source} Example: “serious problem, jumping to conclusions, thinking in black and white.”

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Check the authenticity of the thought. Create two columns under the negative thinking section: one column lists the evidence in favor of the negative thinking, the other the evidence against the negative thinking. ^{[18] X Research Source} Fill in the two columns above to check the veracity of negative thinking.

Continuing with the example out loud to the lover, in the column “Evidence in support” you could write: “His face was angry and red and ran out of the house. He didn’t call me at lunch like usual. day.”
In the “Evidence against” column you can write: “We’ve argued many times, even worse this time, but still made up. He said he needed time to cool down, once he calmed down. come back he will be more rational and willing to compromise.Last week he said he was busy all day today so he couldn’t call me at lunch he promised our marriage would be happy no matter what whatever happens. Arguing is unusual for us” etc
This process helps you to observe your thoughts objectively. You analyze, evaluate, and evaluate your thoughts for authenticity instead of accepting them without question. ^{[19] X Research Source}

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Challenge negative thinking. Ask yourself the following questions about negative thinking and record your answers in a thought journal: ^{[20] X Research Source}

How else can I assess this situation?
If not, how would I view the situation?
In fact, what is likely to happen?
How do other people see the situation?
Does thinking this way help?
Some helpful words to tell yourself?

Learn Positive Thinking Skills

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Make a daily gratitude list. Think of 5 things big or small that make you feel grateful, ^{[21] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to the source} from the house you live in to the smile of a stranger on the bus, or the scene the beautiful sunset you watched yesterday. Expressing gratitude can induce feelings of positivity, optimism, and self-control. ^{[22] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to Source}^{[23] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to Source}

Some other ways to express gratitude are to write a thank you letter, tell your partner you appreciate them, or silently thank someone else. ^{[24] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to Source}

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Make a list of positive attributes. It can be difficult at first, but you will be surprised as the list grows longer. Remember to include your physical attributes (“Strong athlete’s feet”), personality aspects (“I’m kind and generous”), the things you’re good at (“I’m good at drawing”), etc

If you can’t make your own list, you can consult a friend or family member about the traits they like best about you.
Keep the list in an easily accessible place, like in the drawer of your bedside table, the cupboard near the bedroom mirror, or in your journal. Read this list when you get caught up in negative thoughts.

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Rearrange negative thoughts. When negative thoughts arise, do not assume this pessimistic, critical, and unhelpful wording. Isolate the negative thought (such as “I screwed up the test”) and reframe it in a positive, supportive, and encouraging way (“It’s too early to say anything. Maybe I did better). I think.”) ^{[25] X Research Source}

When you start to become aware of and intentionally interrupt negative thoughts, and then rearrange them in a positive way, it becomes easier for you to see things in a positive way. ^{[26] X Research Source}
Remember that events don’t cause emotions, things first form thoughts, then thoughts affect emotions. ^{[27] X Research Source} If you train yourself to respond with positive thoughts, you will experience more positive or neutral emotions. ^{[28] X Research Sources}

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Surround yourself with optimistic people. Research shows that people often share some characteristics with those around them. While you can’t avoid negative people forever, do something to minimize their presence in your life. Vibrant, optimistic people will be a role model for you to compete with. ^{[29] X Research Sources}

Adopting a Long Term Coping Strategy

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Set up a “worry period”. Set aside a specific time and place each day to allow yourself to worry. You should choose an appropriate time to not let yourself worry before going to bed. ^{[30] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source}

Delay everyday worries by focusing them on the end of the “worrying period”. If a negative thought comes up, make a quick note of it and then postpone it to think about it later.
Take a “worry period” to go through the list you just jotted down. If the thought is no longer relevant or disturbing, cross it off the list. You realize that many of your previous negative thoughts have waned and are no longer a concern, you don’t need to worry about them. ^{[31] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source}
If there’s still something bothering you, allow yourself to worry – but only for the set amount of time. ^{[32] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source}

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Accept uncertainty. You can’t be absolutely certain about everything in life, many people have struggled because things went wrong. ^{[33] X Research Source} You need to understand that thinking about what will happen does not make life more predictable or prepare you better, you waste time worrying about what will happen instead of taking action. ^{[34] X Research Source} It will take a long time to get used to the uncertainty, you can practice the following:

When you find yourself paralyzed by things going off course, you need to be aware that you’re stuck and don’t know what’s going to happen. ^{[35] X Research Source}
Feeling unresponsive (don’t “run after” anxiety). Instead, shift thinking about the future to thinking about the present. ^{[36] X Research Source} Use mindfulness meditation to bring yourself back to reality, focusing on your breath and paying attention to how each part of your body feels. ^{[37] X Research Source}

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Look for growth opportunities. Research how to form a preference and replace the negative story you’ve told yourself in the past with a positive one. Develop a new skill or hobby. Allow yourself to learn, understand that there will be mistakes, and this is completely normal!

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Use problem-solving skills to identify action-oriented solutions. Addressing negative thoughts with problem-solving skills means that you try to reduce or eliminate the source of your stress. ^{[38] X Trusted Source Simply Psychpogy Go to Source} So if you’re unemployed and thinking “I’ll never find a job” you can tackle the problem to find a solution. Because negative thinking is caused by unemployment, you can say to yourself, “I found a job before I was fired. The only way to find a new job is to get out of here and start looking. .”

Write down things you can do to start solving the problem, such as searching for a job online, calling a recruiter, asking a friend, seeing an ad in the newspaper. Then let’s get started!
When negative thoughts arise, remind yourself that you have a plan of action and that you are following the solution.

Managing Stress, Anxiety and Fear

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Practice mindfulness meditation . Mindfulness meditation is a form of meditation that focuses your attention on the present moment — smells, sounds, bodily sensations, thoughts, and feelings — asking you to experience them without judgment. ^{[39] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to the source} You’re not trying to fight negative thoughts but don’t depend on them. You are aware of their existence (try naming thoughts “anger”, “fear”, etc.) and try not to react or judge. ^{[40] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to Source}^{[41] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source}

The benefits of mindfulness meditation include reducing repetition (falling into negative thoughts), reducing stress, and improving cognitive flexibility, making it easier to break old thinking habits. ^{[42] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source}
Mindfulness meditation helps you reduce predicting the future and regretting the past, you will focus on the present moment to live life to the fullest. ^{[43] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to source}

Steps

Identifying and Challenging Negative Thinking

Learn Positive Thinking Skills

Adopting a Long Term Coping Strategy

Managing Stress, Anxiety and Fear

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