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This article was co-written by Amy Chan. Amy Chan is the founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, which offers a spiritual and scientific retreat to heal emotional issues. She has helped hundreds of individuals over 2 years. Her debut book, Breakup Bootcamp will be published by HarperCplins in January 2020.
There are 12 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 43,018 times.
Ending a romantic relationship is not easy, whether it’s your decision or your partner’s. You may be dealing with painful emotions and want to deal with them as quickly as possible. There are a number of methods you can take to work through your grief and move on, such as writing about how you’re feeling, allowing yourself to grieve, and being cautious of alternative relationships later. when parting. You need to know that getting over an emotional breakup takes time and perseverance. If after a while things don’t get better, remember that you can always seek support from friends, family, or even a mental health professional.
Steps
Step forward
- If your partner is trying to convince you to keep seeing each other, you should honestly ask yourself if it’s worth it. If you just want to reminisce about the past by meeting up with your ex, you will easily get drawn into your current situation and it will be difficult for you to let go of that person.
- You may need to contact your partner to deal with some issues in your life such as moving house, signing paperwork, etc., but try to limit it to things that are absolutely necessary, and should be. Remember to keep your calls/meetings short and polite.
- Clean up your room, hang some new posters, arrange icons on your computer screen. While it may sound trivial, cleaning will certainly make you feel better.
- If you have a few keepsakes, like a watch or a piece of jewelry that your ex gave you, it’s fine to keep them. But for the time being, you should put them away until you’ve fully recovered from the breakup.
- You don’t have to hang out with other people all the time. Go out and enjoy the freedom to do whatever you want. Go to your favorite coffee shop, go shopping, or go on a short trip.
- Eat a healthy diet that includes lots of vegetables, whole grains, and lean protein. Stay away from “junk” foods, foods high in sugar and fat. [7] X Research Sources
- Sleep for 7-8 hours a night, but you should remember that some people still feel good getting less than 7 hours of sleep, others need more than 8 hours of sleep each night. [8] X Research Sources
- Exercise for 30 minutes at a time, 5 times per week. You can take a 30-minute walk, cycle around the block, or go swimming. [9] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to Source
- Relax for at least 15 minutes a day. You should try meditation, deep breathing exercises, or yoga to help you relax. [10] X Trusted Source Mayo Clinic Go to Source
Coping with emotional pain
- For example, you can skip your regular gym class for a week without worrying about the consequences, but you can’t take a week off work. Use common sense and explain the situation to friends if you need to cancel some plans during your recovery.
- Try to set a specific time for mourning the loss of a relationship. Time to deal with your own emotions can provide you with an outlet while keeping you from wallowing in your emotions. [14] X Research Source
Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC
Marriage and family therapist
Moshe Ratson is the CEO of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a training and therapy clinic in New York City. He received his Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona University and has been in therapy for over 10 years.
Marriage and family therapist
The sooner you accept your feelings and your situation, the quicker your suffering will end.
- Don’t hesitate to turn to friends and family for support when you need to talk to someone or need a shoulder to cry on.
- Find a new hobby to keep yourself busy while recovering from a breakup. You can join a class, club, or teach yourself how to do something. Pursuing a hobby can help you feel better about yourself, help you avoid thinking about pain for a while, and build self-esteem by developing new skills.
Coping with your own emotions
- Am I the one who contributed to the end of the relationship? If so, what did I do?
- Do I have a tendency to choose a certain type of person to date? If so, what kind of people are they? Are they good to me? Why yes or why not?
- Did I have the same problem in another relationship? If so, what caused me to have this problem? What else can I do in a different relationship in the future?
Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC
Marriage and family therapist
Moshe Ratson is the CEO of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a training and therapy clinic in New York City. He received his Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona University and has been in therapy for over 10 years.
Marriage and family therapist
By taking the time to forgive yourself and others, you can find the good in bad situations.
- Every day, you should try to write about your feelings after the breakup until you feel better. For example, you could start each journal entry with the sentence, “It’s been __ days since the breakup and I’m feeling _____.” You can then describe in more detail how you feel. This cue will help you track your emotional progress over time and handle those emotions well. [19] X Research Source
- You can write a letter to your ex, but don’t send it. Sometimes it can help you to let your emotions out. However, sending it out is not a good idea. This letter is for you, so you can write whatever you want to say and end it. It won’t do you any good if you keep repeating the breakup, so you should just pretend that this is the last time you tell your partner how you feel.
- Write a story. Think about a time when you started a relationship with that person, and document this time from beginning to end. This can be quite painful, but it will give you a broader perspective. When you get to the final chapter, end the story on a positive note and write “Done”.
- Breathe deeply and focus on relaxing your muscles. [21] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to source . Soft music can often help.
- For example, perhaps your partner is discouraging your efforts to eat healthy, so now it’s perfectly okay for you to follow a healthy diet and take more care of yourself. close. Or your ex never wanted you to do the things you liked, so you are completely free to do them now. Make a list of all the reasons why you were better off when you broke up with your partner.
Advice
- Remember that the person may also be trying to erase your image from his or her mind. You should be careful with this and should keep your distance. If you have decided not to see each other, you should stick to this decision: stop seeing each other.
- You should know that it’s okay to cry and express your feelings. You’ll feel better about facing your emotions than trying to suppress them.
- You can conduct a symbolic ceremony. People often hold funerals to remember the deceased who lost their body, and you can also say goodbye to your relationship that will never be resolved in a little formal way. Collect all the things that remind you of that person and burn them, or donate them to charity. Prepare your eulogy and read it out loud.
Warning
- If you find that you often check MySpace, Facebook, or any of your ex’s social media accounts, you should use a program or set up your browser to block URLs to your ex’s account. Removing your ex’s account from your friends list is also quite helpful. Even if things end well, it can still be painful and uncomfortable to read your partner’s posts.
- Watch out for stalking or threatening behavior, and if you notice anything, report it to the police quickly. That person may just be having a hard time, not putting you in danger. But you shouldn’t be reckless either. If necessary, you can request a restraining order (no access) or protective order and call the police every time there is a violation; you will need to have paperwork if stalking increases.
This article was co-written by Amy Chan. Amy Chan is the founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp, which offers a spiritual and scientific retreat to heal emotional issues. She has helped hundreds of individuals over 2 years. Her debut book, Breakup Bootcamp will be published by HarperCplins in January 2020.
There are 12 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 43,018 times.
Ending a romantic relationship is not easy, whether it’s your decision or your partner’s. You may be dealing with painful emotions and want to deal with them as quickly as possible. There are a number of methods you can take to work through your grief and move on, such as writing about how you’re feeling, allowing yourself to grieve, and being cautious of alternative relationships later. when parting. You need to know that getting over an emotional breakup takes time and perseverance. If after a while things don’t get better, remember that you can always seek support from friends, family, or even a mental health professional.
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