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How many people in this world can easily forget their first love? First love teaches you what it’s like to feel romantic at first. Any first experience will set the tone for future similar experiences. If you’re struggling to get over your first love, that’s completely normal. It’s something that many people experience, but there are some things you can do to get over it and move on. The first thing is to limit thinking about the ex. Try to focus on the present and don’t dwell on the past. Try to adopt a healthier alternative to your ex. The love affair is over, but thanks to that you have learned a lot about yourself. After a period of grief, try to move on. Focus on what lies ahead instead of forever regretting a lost love.
Steps
Mental control
- Choose a time of day to think about your ex, like half an hour every morning. If you find it difficult to recall old memories, you can try listening to a song or thinking about a movie you both love.
- Then you should try to avoid thinking about your ex for the rest of the day. If you notice that person’s image creeping into your mind, say something like, “I’ve been thinking about this today. You’ll think about it tomorrow.”
- There is no love like any other. You are right in thinking that you will never feel the same way again. However, this does not mean that you will never be able to love again or be happy again.
- Be realistic. Don’t most first loves fail? Think of your parents, friends, or other family members. Maybe everyone has experienced the feeling of losing their first love but finally found their other half.
- Remind yourself that things are hard right now, but you will love and be happy again even if it takes a long time.
- Engage in activities that help you live in the moment. Find a new hobby. Join a club. Do volunteer work somewhere. Go to the gym. Any activity that can help you live in the present helps.
- New memories will help you get over the past. Steady steps toward new things and better memories can help you get over your ex.
- In addition to maintaining a proper diet and sleep, do yourself a favor. Don’t be afraid to comfort yourself after breaking up with your ex.
- Night out with friends. Order food to the house. Walk or cycle long distances. Watch a movie you love.
- Sometimes you’ll feel better having a little phone conversation with a comforting friend. Talking about your feelings can help you get through this difficult time.
- If you feel shy about asking a friend or family member for help, try to do the same for them when they need comfort.
Develop a vision of the past
- Think about why your first love broke up. Is there anything you could have behaved differently? Is there any reason why the two are not compatible? Why was your ex attracted to you back then? Is it for the wrong cause?
- In most cases, a romantic relationship doesn’t work out just because two people don’t get along. You can take this opportunity to consider how to choose a more appropriate lover in the future.
- You can find strength in old memories. Use those memories as a way to remember yourself as someone in love. It’s always good to remind yourself that you have a loving soul.
- Old memories can also help you feel better on unlucky days. You may suddenly recall the words of encouragement from your ex when you feel that you are not good. Hold on to old memories, as long as you understand that the relationship is over.
- Maybe you remember your first relationship experiences through a magnifying lens. This can lead to a tendency to compare your current feelings with past feelings when you were in a new relationship. However, think about any of your first experiences. Are you exaggerating like that? Perhaps you were very excited on the first day of your new job, but chances are that the day was no different than any other.
- Instead of seeing your first love as a perfect lover, you should see it as an experience. You have learned to love and have a romantic relationship. However, the person who was once with you may not be the only one for you. You tend to romanticize memories just because that’s when you first fell in love.
Step forward
- Review what you want in life. In addition to finding your other half, think of other goals. For example, what profession or major do you like?
- Loss does not mean failure. The reality is that most of us have faced many losses or rejections on our way to bigger goals. You don’t have to rely on someone to achieve your goals.
- Reflect on what you want in love. Think about how your needs are met and unmet. This will help you find a more suitable life partner in the future.
- Many people keep pursuing one love after another, hoping to find the right person. However, if you yourself have something wrong, you will not be able to find a love like that. You need to grieve for your first love and figure out what you want in the future.
- Find someone who is okay with being alone. You need to follow the example of someone who doesn’t need a relationship to be happy.
- Once you find someone like that, think about how they deal with grief. See how they remain independent and strong after a breakup.
- Don’t panic if pictures of your ex leave you sad. If you try too hard to avoid feeling depressed, you could make the situation worse.
- Instead, accept that you will feel a little sad. Cry if you feel the need. Let go of the feeling of sadness so that you can move on.
- To help you see things differently, think about times when you were sad in the past, and remember that you finally felt better. The sadness will fade and over time you will have good days again.
Maria Avgitidis
Matchmakers and dating consultants
Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service company based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with today’s youth dating psychology and search techniques to ensure her clients find her. the other half. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in magazines and television channels such as The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice and Thrillist.
Matchmakers and dating consultants
Experts say: You need time to let go of any love, but there are ways to reduce sadness. To make a difficult time go more smoothly, you should meet a lot of people, take up new hobbies, or focus on doing things you enjoy.
Advice
- Try writing down your feelings. When bad thoughts and feelings replay in your head, writing them down can help.
- Stay busy. Do not allow yourself to be idle, because that is the door that opens to your thoughts about that person. Exercise, clean the house, or pursue a hobby.
- Accept the fact and understand that if your ex really wants to stay friends, they’ll have to play a part, and you’re not alone in making an effort to be around them as friends. You deserve better than that.
- Get rid of your ex’s items that you may still have. Clothes that still have the scent of your ex can remind you of that person more than anything else. The notes they wrote and their drawings should also be discarded. When you see things that used to make you happy, you will only get sadder.
- Talk to new people. Meeting new people will help you forget about your ex and force you to focus on a new group of friends. Join a club, volunteer, go to social events alone or with others.
Warning
- Even if you hate your ex, don’t scold them. That only makes you feel more uncomfortable.
- Checking your ex’s Facebook is a bad idea. It will only make you frustrated to see the pictures and read the text posted by other people.
- Do not use addictive substances to escape. They can’t help you in the long run, on the contrary, can lead to a worse outcome. Avoid alcohol or other stimulants during the healing period after a breakup.
This article is co-authored by a team of editors and trained researchers who confirm the accuracy and completeness of the article.
The wikiHow Content Management team carefully monitors the work of editors to ensure that every article is up to a high standard of quality.
This article has been viewed 13,453 times.
How many people in this world can easily forget their first love? First love teaches you what it’s like to feel romantic at first. Any first experience will set the tone for future similar experiences. If you’re struggling to get over your first love, that’s completely normal. It’s something that many people experience, but there are some things you can do to get over it and move on. The first thing is to limit thinking about the ex. Try to focus on the present and don’t dwell on the past. Try to adopt a healthier alternative to your ex. The love affair is over, but thanks to that you have learned a lot about yourself. After a period of grief, try to move on. Focus on what lies ahead instead of forever regretting a lost love.
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