How to Flirty

Flirting, which is basically half-joking, half-truth shows that you’re attracted to someone. If you’re ready to flirt with someone, you should know if you’re attracted to them, and vice versa! Initiating flirting and putting yourself to the test may sound intimidating, but don’t worry – it’s completely normal to feel nervous around someone you really like, and it’s completely fixable. There are many ways to attract that person to succeed. Whether you’re flirting over text, chatting online, or chatting in person, it’s important to strike a balance between showing your emotions and showing your attraction to the person. If you want to know how to flirt and get to know someone, check out these basic tips.

Table of Contents

Live flirting

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Eye contact. Eye contact is a great and easy way to start flirting. You can look deeply into the other person’s eyes, then look away to calm things down. Consider applying the following:

Make him/her look at you. You don’t have to stare, just glance at the person. Continue until the person catches you looking at them. Hold that contact long enough then smile, then turn away.
Look the person in the eye, especially at meaningful times in the conversation (for example, when you’re complimenting them).
Wink or raise your eyebrows. It seems a bit gimmicky, but it’s quite effective if used appropriately. You can use it when you’re looking at the person from across the room, or when you’re talking in a group and you say something really meaningful to him/her.
For the ladies: when looking at a guy, slowly lower your gaze, then look up at him again through your lashes.

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Smile. When talking to that person, you will naturally laugh a lot, but we can actively use this “white pearl” to our advantage even before the conversation has even started. Smile at that person when you meet him in the hallway, or when you recognize him from across the room. There’s no need to grin; Just a simple and subtle smile. Try these variations:

Smile slowly. When the two of you are just looking at each other, not talking, you should smile instead of grin. A gentle smile is said to be very attractive.
Smile when you make eye contact. If you suddenly look your crush in the eye, accompanied by a Duchenne smile (a genuine smile that makes the corners of the eyes slightly wrinkled), the other person will sense that you are smiling without looking at your mouth.
Combined with “smiling eyes”. Your face will light up when you smile.

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Start a conversation. You can introduce yourself first or maintain your mystery (optional). If you don’t know the person yet, getting to know each other (one of the two ways above) is a great way to build a friendship. Don’t get too nervous to say something awkward. Simply saying “Hello,” followed by an introduction or a simple question is more effective and less awkward.

If the person doesn’t know your name and you don’t stand out, try introducing yourself sometime. As simple as, “Hi, I’m [your name]. What’s your name?” You have to memorize their names. To remember it longer, try repeating the name after the person answers you. For example: “Quynh Anh, I like that name.”
Or, if you want to be a bit mysterious, start a conversation without introducing yourself. If that person really wants to know, he or she will actively ask or pursue you.
If the person you like speaks another language like Spanish, learn a few words of that language before you start the conversation.

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Start a conversation. Whether the two of you already know each other, a conversation is the best way to flirt. He or she will be impressed by your courage and confidence. Here are a few suggestions:

For someone you don’t know yet: strike up a conversation. Perhaps the best way to start a conversation is to say something and end it with a question: “It was so beautiful earlier, I can’t believe it rained so hard” or “This place is beautiful.” huh?” It doesn’t matter what you say – mostly you’re getting the person to talk to you.
For someone you know: find common ground. If you’ve already met the person, start a conversation based on shared experiences or interests. For example, you could talk about a class that you are both taking. Again, the topic of the story doesn’t matter – what matters is that you’re inviting them to interact with you.
Capture feedback. If the person responds happily, continue the conversation. If they don’t respond or seem indifferent, he/she may not be interested in your flirting.

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Keep things light. Don’t bring anything too personal when chatting. You can talk about the environment or the TV show you just watched, and so on. Limit the inclusion of personal information (such as religion, money, relationships, education, etc.) in the story unless the person enjoys peaceful intellectual arguments. In general, it’s best to avoid debating topics that are personally relevant to each person (such as your or your partner’s religion), and discuss topics where no one has a deep opinion.

There are more chances of flirting if you talk about fun and engaging topics, such as pets, reality TV, or your favorite spots. You don’t have to be quiet, but you do have to be comfortable and avoid talking too deeply at first.
Be witty. To be witty is to show a bit of innocence, such as nudging the other person on the shoulder or saying something against the rules and full of surprises, in general, not being too serious and should not create too much pressure on yourself. support yourself during the conversation.

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Use body language to convey your intentions. Non-verbal languages can actually be more expressive of emotions than words come from, so don’t forget to use them. Try the following expressions:

Hold the “open” position. Don’t cross your arms or legs, these are signs that you want to isolate yourself from others.
Point your body towards the person. Stand or sit with your face towards the person you are flirting with. Lean towards the person or point your toes in that direction.
Break the “collision barrier”. Start by touching the other person’s arm during a conversation or “accidentally” getting too close and bumping into him or her.
Play with your hair (if you’re a girl). Playing with hair is a sign of anxiety. When talking to the person, if you want him or her to know that you are confused (meaning you care about them), take turns winding a few strands of hair around your fingers.

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Break the collision barrier. If this is the first time the two of you have had physical contact, be careful not to let the person think you are “on purpose”. Maintain contact just enough for longer than an accident while not embarrassing the person. Don’t hold hands or arms, instead, try “accidental” gestures like pretending to brush dirt off your arm, touching your partner’s leg or knee (no caressing).

While they don’t mean to embarrass or embarrass you, they may refuse these touches, so if he or she isn’t ready for these types of communication, don’t force them to explicitly reject you. clear.

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Praise the other person at the beginning of a conversation. It may seem too early, but letting him or her know you’re interested in dating before a close friendship begins is the easiest way to get around the “friend zone”. Always be confident and don’t let an opportunity slip away – because we never know if an opportunity will ever come again. Here are some techniques you can apply:

Maintain eye contact while complimenting . Looking away during compliments can make you seem insincere.
Lower your voice and speak softly . Compliment in a lower voice than your usual voice makes the compliment more intimate and sexy. Also, because you speak a little softly, the person will have to get closer to hear you.
Use that person’s interest to your advantage . If you know the person is dating (or interested in) someone else, you can use this as a basis for compliments.
Insert compliments into the conversation. For example, if the girl you like is complaining about having a bad day, you could say, “I hate to see someone as beautiful as you upset. Is there anything I can do for you?”
Use compliments about your appearance judiciously . If you compliment her eyes, she’ll be happy. But if you compliment her on the curves of her body, you run the risk of coming off as a bad person in her eyes. So choose to be safe and compliment her on the following traits:
- Eyes
- Smile
- Lips
- Hair
- Hands

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Keep interactions short and sweet. Remember that the key to creating demand is tight supply, so try to limit your interactions with your audience. Don’t talk to him every day. Make it a special event that happens only a few times a week.

The conversation should not last more than 5 or 10 minutes. The longer you talk, the more likely you are to fall into the silence.
Let him take the initiative. After you start interacting and spark interest, step back a bit and see if they’re looking for your interaction. This can be a great way to create momentum and gauge the person’s interest.

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Finish the speaking. If everything has been going well so far and you want to get to know the person better, this is a good time to ask for a date. Here are a few approaches:

Ask the person what he or she has planned for the next day. For example, “So, what are you going to do this Saturday night?” Try to ask this open-ended question instead of a “yes”/”no” question – you’ll get more information that way. Don’t ask the person about their plans tonight or even tomorrow. Try to schedule your appointment a few days apart so they don’t see that you’re too eager.
Suggest a specific event and suggest that the person go with you. This is the best approach if you’re trying to arrange a group day out. You can say, “We’re going to the movies on Friday, would you like to come along? I’d be happy if you’d come with us.”
Be frank. If you feel confident enough, go straight to the point without going around. For example: “I really want to ask you out. When are you free?”

Flirting by texting or chatting online

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Approach naturally. Don’t let yourself get so worried that you forget basic communication skills. Instead, try to stay calm and start the conversation gently. If you’ve never chatted with this person online before, you can still find a reason to start a conversation, like asking about homework or talking about a sports team you both like. If you’re about to send that person your first text, make sure they know who you are and don’t feel weird. Here are a few ways to start a text chat or chat online:

“Hi ___, what are you doing?”
“Did you hear/know about [insert event that both know]?”
“How was your week?”

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Don’t talk about yourself too much . We often feel most comfortable talking about ourselves because it’s a subject we know well. Instead of rambling about yourself , encourage others to talk about themselves. However, sometimes you can insert a little bit of your personal information in the direction the person is talking so they can ask questions about you. The key to communication here is to leave some interesting information that makes them want to learn about you.

You will achieve two purposes: not only will you keep the conversation going, but you will also get to know the person more.
You don’t have to know the person first to use this tactic. If you two don’t know each other, you can ask:
- “How is your day going?”
- “What do you usually do in your free time?”
If you know the person, focus on their passions or interests that you know. For example, if he’s really into basketball, you could ask, “Did you watch the game last night?”. Or if she loves to read, ask, “Have you read any good books lately?”. These would be great starts.

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Know when to push for more information. You can keep the conversation alive and interesting without getting too deep into personal topics. You should stop at only general topics, such as asking his opinion on a charity run. Limit talking about topics like their family or close friends as it may seem too in-depth and premature. You can have a witty conversation, flirt with the person, don’t make them feel like they’re in an interview or take it too seriously. Here are some flirting ways to get more information:

“So are you going to stay home online or do something tonight?”
“What books are you going to buy at the weekend book festival?”
“I see a cute cat that often appears in your photos. How old is it?”

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Praise the person at the beginning of the conversation. Don’t skip this step – it may not seem easy, but it’s incredibly important. An implicit compliment lets them know that you want to date and doesn’t put you in the dreaded “friend zone”. If you skip the compliment and just keep the conversation friendly, you’ll miss your chance. Here are some basic compliments you can apply:

If the two of you do not know each other and are currently getting to know each other, please use this to compliment. Say something like “It’s easier to talk to you than I thought” or “Can’t believe I’m getting to know someone as interesting as you.”
Incorporate compliments into the conversation. For example, if the girl you like is talking about how bad your day is, you could say, “I hate to see someone as beautiful as you upset. Is there anything I can do for you?”

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Become courageous . If none of the suggestions work for you, feel free to offer your own compliments. Refer to the following sentence samples and choose the adjective that best suits that person:

“You know you’re amazing/beautiful/smart.”
“Sorry if this is too abrupt, but I have to say you’re amazing/wonderful/beautiful…”

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Don’t be too eager. When you first meet, you should not compliment the person too much. Leaving when they aren’t sure how much you love them will increase your attraction, giving you a veil of mystery. The point is not to make them wonder if you like them, but to make them wonder how much you like them. If you keep saying “I really like you” or “I’ve always found you very attractive”, you will be less attractive in conversation.

Instead of constantly complimenting the person, you can send a note or a text saying something like, “You look cute in that sweater today” or another kind and witty comment. without making anything obvious.

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Find a way to reverse the situation. Although the purpose of flirting is to let the person know that you like them, you shouldn’t try too hard. Instead, give them just enough praise so they know you care, but they still have to wonder how much you care. To do this, phrase things objectively instead of subjectively. The following are examples of objective and subjective compliments:

“I really like your eyes, they’re so pretty.” At first glance, compliments sound positive and can be appreciated. However, a common flaw in describing a romantic compliment is to repeatedly use the phrase “I like/love *add feature here*”, which is tantamount to declaring to the person that they have succeed in capturing your heart. This is great if the two of you have built a solid relationship, but if the two of you are just getting to know, it can make them think you’re “too easy to conquer”.
“You have very beautiful eyes, they are very attractive.” While technically both sentences convey that you like the person’s eyes, this sentence makes the compliment more observational than personal. It implies that you find the other person attractive but doesn’t claim it right away. Listeners will feel both proud and curious to know how attractive you find them.

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Mild teasing. The downside of texting or chatting online is that you can’t use body language to express how you feel, so you’ll have to use words to keep the atmosphere lively. From the outset, use implied jokes (based on events the two of you were present) to tease (“Ah, I think I saw a raccoon this morning)”, and exaggerate (“Ah, I saw a panda this morning)”, and exaggerate (“Ah, I saw a raccoon this morning)”, You’re ten times better than me, much worse if it were me.”)

Make it clear that you are joking. Limit the use of messages to chat because we can’t always understand the emotions behind the words. If you use teasing to flirt, make sure they know you’re joking. You can use more emoticons, symbols or exclamation points to confirm this. Just don’t overuse emojis, or they’ll start to think you’re ridiculous.
- If you send them something that is likely to be misinterpreted, make that clear. Add parentheses for comments such as “[what you said] (I was joking!).

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Make him or her want more. You want to be texting them all day, of course, but it’s best to stop before the conversation gets boring (since all conversations have a stop). The best way to avoid that is to stop first. Leave a hint about next time so that the person has a sense of anticipation for the next chat.

Set up your next interaction before you leave. Say something like “See you tomorrow?” Or “I’ll talk to you later.”
If you’re chatting online, emphasize that you enjoyed the conversation before saying goodbye. It doesn’t have to be complicated – simply “Have fun!” or “We’ve had a great time talking” is enough. If you two are texting then you can skip this part.
Don’t give too much praise. Your compliments will be more meaningful if you give them just enough and appropriately. Instead of complimenting every little detail, focus on what is important to the person, such as complimenting a skill they are proud of.

Advice

Don’t complain while flirting. Remember, the world doesn’t revolve around you. If you complain too much, other people will find you annoying and stay away from you. This is similar to self-loathing, which is not modesty but a form of self-deprecation.
Limit your phone use (i.e. don’t text) while you’re flirting with someone. This shows that you are interested in chatting with other people or that you already have a lover.
If you’re flirting with a girl and thinking about breaking the boundaries of touch, try her reactions. For example: reach out your hand when she needs to balance, when she gets in/out a car, when she walks over a puddle or any other slippery surface. How does she respond to you when you hold out her hand? Grab or dodge?
Don’t flirt with someone you don’t really like, or know that person is not interested in you. Otherwise, both will have awkward times and uncomfortable interactions later.
Flirting is not possible everywhere. Funerals are not a place to joke around. Neither does the workplace. If you’re flirting with someone at work, do your best and don’t take it seriously if the person doesn’t like you.
No need should arise. Need is the precursor to obsession, and obsession is scary. Miserable people are unbalanced and unstable because their happiness is not a certain sense of self-worth, it depends on others. If you have the feeling that you will be devastated if someone doesn’t want to be your friend or lover, the calculation will make everything important and stressful.
Flirting should be appropriate to the situation. For example, it is difficult for you to have a great conversation if you meet in a library or a large hall. In this case, just smile, show concern, and wait for a natural opportunity to talk, such as when you go to get a drink together or go out in the hallway. If you’re so nervous that you don’t dare to start a conversation and just follow them around, you’ll look weird. Reach out to chat as soon as you get the first opportunity.
Try giving the person your contact information if you feel shy about asking for his or her information.
If the person is really interested in you, they will call you. Alternatively you can also give them their email address.

Attention

In some cases, flirting can turn into unwanted behavior, even being viewed as sexual harassment. This behavior is illegal or at least violates your school or workplace policy and leaves the victim emotionally traumatized.

Steps

Live flirting

Flirting by texting or chatting online

Advice

Attention

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