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This article was co-written by Maria Avgitidis. Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service company based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with today’s youth dating psychology and search techniques to ensure her clients find her. the other half. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in magazines and television channels such as The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice and Thrillist.
There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 2,813 times.
There are many reasons why you might want to flirt with your boss. Maybe you feel an irresistible attraction from your boss and want to pursue a relationship, or you read the still-controversial study that women who flirt in the workplace are more likely to get promoted. (Sorry guys, this won’t work for you.) Regardless of the reason, it’s important to know that flirting in the workplace is risky, so proceed carefully. This article will guide you through assessing the risks, then provide tips on how to let your boss down, it’s up to you to choose whether or not to continue…
Steps
Situation analysis
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Think about your own motivation. You’ve spent some time searching for articles on how to flirt with your boss, so it’s obvious that you’ve been thinking a little about it. Ask yourself why would you want to lead your boss? You’re bored? Do you find your boss attractive and want to develop a relationship? Are you trying to gain advantage or gain at the company? Determining why you want to flirt with your boss will help you gauge whether it’s worth the risk.
- A little back-and-forth with your boss can get a little extra attention to get an important piece of work you desperately want to get done, or keep a convenient shift. Of course, this can also be counterproductive depending on your workplace culture.
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Think about limits. Are you flirting for fun or hoping to start a romantic relationship with your boss? Determine what your limits are and don’t ask for more than you need to. Seducing someone is not the same as getting everything you want.
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Beware of workplace consequences. Workplace relationships, especially between management and employees, are often forbidden in many companies. Hanging out with your boss can put both of you in jeopardy of losing your job. If your flirting is unacceptable or excessive, you are in danger of crossing the line from flirting to sexual harassment, which most places will fire you immediately. In the end, you may lose credibility or reputation, trust at the company.
- Even after-hours interactions with your boss can serve as a valid excuse for one or both to be fired, so be on the lookout! [1] X Research Source
- Research your company’s relationship policy before engaging in any flirting. If there is no such regulation, ask the human resources department for assistance.
- If you’re afraid to ask questions because you’re afraid people will gossip, remember that they will gossip even more if you involve your boss, so take that into account in your decision.
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Consider social consequences. If flirting with your boss doesn’t get you in trouble at work, it’ll still be discouraging. Other co-workers may look down on you for flirting with your boss or be jealous if you get extra special treatment for flirting. You may also be embarrassed if the flirting doesn’t work out, or the relationship doesn’t end well.
See you boss
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Proceed with caution . You’ve decided it’s worth the risk, and you’ve reached the stage of flirting with your boss. Now be careful! Because there is so much risk, a good approach is to be very sensitive to any reciprocity from your partner, your behavior being subtle enough that you won’t be flirting if things don’t work out. expectation. It’s called the give without pushing. [2] X Research Source
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Eye contact. Eye contact is the first lesson in the Letting Go 101 tip, and sometimes it’s the only tool you need to show interest in the subject. [3] X Research Sources Eye contact is an equally effective tool between men and women, even making someone feel more attracted to you.
- Try to catch the boss’s eye during the meeting and hold it for a little longer than usual.
- When your boss mentions you, make sure to look them straight in the eye when they talk to you.
- Create more opportunities for eye contact by walking past your boss more often, or arranging an in-person meeting instead of calling or emailing.
- Remember that it will take more than one eye contact to get your message across. It may take 3-13 soulful glances for your boss to realize you’re trying to shoot them a heart attack. [4] X Research Sources
- On the contrary, too much eye contact will scare people, so pay attention to how the other person perceives you. If your boss tries to avoid your gaze or fidgets uncomfortably, reduce the dose.
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Laugh. Smiling may seem like simple advice, but there’s more to it than a friendly, genuine smile. Don’t worry about the wrinkles you have or don’t, crow’s feet are sometimes proof of a genuine smile that isn’t forced. Put on a genuine smile every time you see your boss so they know you’re happy to see them. [5] X Research Sources
- In theory, it would be difficult to practice a genuine smile, but if you want to know what it looks like, try thinking of a funny story and looking in the mirror.
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Focus. You should pay more attention when your boss is talking and try to appear interested, even if not really excited about the topic at hand. Ask questions to show interest and comments show enthusiasm. (Like “Wow, I didn’t know that!”).
- Don’t overdo it. Honesty is more important than focused gestures.
- Imitating your boss’s body language when you’re talking is a non-verbal way of showing that you’re paying attention.
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Accidental light touch. This is probably the riskiest move when flirting with your boss, but it’s also the most effective way to show your affection. Don’t take this step if you haven’t received specific, positive feedback from previous hearings (your boss returns your gaze and smiles, looking like they’re interested in you). [6] X Research Sources
- Take the initiative to shake hands and smile at the end of the meeting.
- Try a quick, light touch on your forearm or shoulder when talking to your boss.
- When your boss talks to you, smile and put your hand on their arm. Hold for a second and then release.
- Avoid any overly cuddly or sexually suggestive behavior at work. This includes shoulder rubs, hugs, hands on knees…etc. Even if the other person wants it, you can still get fired.
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Pay attention to the signs. Flirting with your boss is a risky game, so pay close attention to each response and go slowly. If your gaze is returned, everything seems to be going well. If, however, your boss seems to be avoiding, glaring or glancing at you, you’ve upset them, abandon the assignment immediately.
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Avoid actions that cannot be undone. You can send flirty texts or email to someone you like outside of work, but the written words will be hard to take back or ignore when things don’t work out, so absolutely avoid in love or flirting places. office.
- Remember that in many cases, employers have the right to track any email you send or receive using a company computer, or even text messages and calls made on a company phone. [7] X Research Sources
- If your hearing is responded to and the texting/mailing phase has changed, be sure to do this interaction on a personal computer or phone/personal email address.
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Honest and forthright. If all goes well, someone will have to take the initiative to come forward if the relationship is to work out. Because of the complexity involved in work relationships, it’s best to talk directly about the current situation rather than rush into each other physically. Be upfront about your intentions and give your boss a chance to reciprocate. It may sound awkward, but it’s important to make sure you’re both on the same page before going any further.
- Invite your boss for coffee or lunch, then bring up the problem.
- Initiate the topic slowly and leave a way out for yourself if you guess the situation wrong.
- For example, you could start with some work-related chatter and then progress to the question, “What do you think about relationships at work?”. Your boss’s answer can give you a clear indication of whether you should continue or stop.
- Remember: If it turns out that you’ve got it all wrong and your boss isn’t interested, you’ll be less embarrassed to have had a frank conversation than to wait until you try to kiss him or worse.
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This article was co-written by Maria Avgitidis. Maria Avgitidis is the CEO & Matchmaker of Agape Match, a matchmaking service company based out of New York City. For over a decade, she has successfully combined four generations of family matchmaking tradition with today’s youth dating psychology and search techniques to ensure her clients find her. the other half. Maria and Agape Match have been featured in magazines and television channels such as The New York Times, The Financial Times, Fast Company, CNN, Esquire, Elle, Reuters, Vice and Thrillist.
There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 2,813 times.
There are many reasons why you might want to flirt with your boss. Maybe you feel an irresistible attraction from your boss and want to pursue a relationship, or you read the still-controversial study that women who flirt in the workplace are more likely to get promoted. (Sorry guys, this won’t work for you.) Regardless of the reason, it’s important to know that flirting in the workplace is risky, so proceed carefully. This article will guide you through assessing the risks, then provide tips on how to let your boss down, it’s up to you to choose whether or not to continue…
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