How to Escape from Home (for Teens)

Running away from home is the last resort that you should only resort to in an impossible situation. In many cases, this action will make the problem you’re trying to get out of will become worse. Finding a place to live is not easy. You must be sure to try everything before you think about running away from home, and only when there is no other option. Don’t make hasty decisions. Your safety should always come first. Consider any changes as you read this article.

If you are planning to run away or have run away and need someone to talk to, call 111 (National Call Center for Child Protection). Alternatively, you can also call 1800 1567 (child counseling and support service provided by the Department of Child Care and Protection – Ministry of Labour, Invalids and Social Affairs with the support of Plan organization at Vietnam).

Table of Contents

Situational assessment

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There’s a good reason. Don’t leave home to protest, adventure, or “teach” your parents a lesson. ^{[1] X Research Source} Life on the street will be hard and nature won’t give you warm blankets when you’re cold or food when you’re hungry. If you are being abused or neglected, the safest solution is to call a child care center or the police before you leave home.

Some teenagers, especially those who live in problem families, think that being overprotective is worse than running away from home. ^{[2] X Research Source} No matter what you’ve been through, most parents are overprotective just because they care about their children’s health and happiness.

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Don’t hold the wrong opinion. Leaving the house is going to be very hard. You will be separated from familiar places, from people who are familiar and supportive of you, and you will have to completely meet all your basic needs on your own. ^{[3] X Research Sources} Even adults struggle with everyday life – don’t expect your case to be any different. ^{[4] X Research Sources}

You may think that running away is the only solution, but this line of thinking has never been true. ^{[5] X Research Sources} There are always many solutions to a problem, and running away from home is only a last resort.
When you’re in your teens, it’s going to be very difficult to earn money to provide food and shelter. Unfortunately, for this reason, about one in three minors who run away from home are forced to sell sex for food and shelter. ^{[6] X Research Resources} This puts you at risk of contracting sexually transmitted diseases, being sexually abused and/or being manipulated.

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Consider the reason(s) for leaving home. You may believe that your justification(s) for running away is good. However, when you are deeply emotional about something, it will be difficult for you to think clearly. ^{[7] X Research Resources} Spend some time thinking hard about why you want to run away from home; Look at the problem from every angle you can think of. Make sure you don’t make a hasty decision.

Running away from home is never right for the following reasons:
- alcohol use
- using stimulants
- feel like a failure

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Consider listening to anonymous tips. There are hotlines for minors in difficult situations. The specialists there are trained to listen to your troubles and offer specific advice. There may be safer workarounds than running away from home that you haven’t thought of, and talking to someone can help you find those solutions. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

The National Call Center for child protection works 24/7. You can call 111, or 1800 1567 (child support and counseling services).
Remember, no matter how extreme your circumstances or how lonely you feel, there are people who are genuinely concerned for your safety and well-being.

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Realize the nature of your problem. While running away from home can get you out of the trouble you’re facing, it won’t solve the problem or make you feel better with the way you’ve been treated. ^{[9] X Research Source} The fact is, you may be causing what happened to you to pass on to someone else by leaving home.

Preparing to leave home

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Plan ahead. When you run away from home unprepared, you can put yourself in danger. You need to spend as much time planning your escape plan. Where you will be going, by what means of transport, where to work and where to stay are important things to consider. Focus on the essentials first, which include:

Cash
Coins for washing clothes at the laundromat
Medical first aid kit
Raincoat
Sleeping bag
Socks
Clothes to change (x2)
Underwear (x2)
Toothbrush/toothpaste
Sanitary napkin
Comb
Bottle of water
Non-perishable food (dry food, canned food)
Pepper spray
Deodorant products ^{[10] X Research Source}

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Carry light luggage. Heavy luggage will slow you down when you need to move quickly. You are just a minor running away from home, and there are many homeless people bigger and stronger than you. In case you need to escape, you have to be quick and not be entangled with messy furniture. Only pack the essentials. Bring as much cash as you can, but be careful with debit or credit cards as these can leave marks. Please prepare luggage that meets the conditions of the destination. If you are going to a cold area, the most important thing you need to pay attention to is to keep warm.

Remember that dry climates, such as deserts, get very cold after sunset. A lightweight blanket that retains heat can save you. ^{[11] X Research Source}

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Choose a safe location. Do not stay in forests, parks or nature reserves. With just one slip, you may have to wander around with a broken ankle without being able to reach a medical facility because it’s too far away. If you want to go to the countryside, you need to make sure to follow the highway so that you can call for help when needed. If you live in the city or plan to run to the city, you should try to find shelter. If there are no safe options, try to sleep during the day in a crowded place. During the day, spread a blanket in the park or on the beach to sleep. That way people will be less suspicious because you look like a normal person taking a nap.

Locations with public transport are a good choice, as they are cheaper and faster than other options.
A bicycle can be useful, but because it is bulky and requires care, it becomes more of a nuisance than a benefit.
The bridges also provide shelter from the elements; Cement is a material that collects heat during the day and keeps it warm at night. Beware of strangers if you plan to sleep under a bridge; Places like these are also popular with other homeless people.
If you choose to run to the shelter, you will have to be prepared to answer questions upon arrival.
You can go to a friend’s or relative’s house, but “join freely”. You must always respect the housing of others.

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Find a place where you can get help when you need it. The most important thing you can do after you run away is to find support. No matter what incident causes you to run away from home, there are consequences that you must deal with before you can begin a healthy and happy life. ^{[12] X Research Sources}^{[13] X Trusted Source HelpGuide Go to Source} Before leaving home, search for referrals, rehab centers or counseling centers in your area for help. can get help when needed.

If you have ever turned to drugs or alcohol to cope with your suffering, you will end up suffering an even more terrible disaster, both physically and mentally. It’s not your fault; misfortunes have put you in a vulnerable situation. However, you cannot truly live well without identifying and addressing your addiction or dependence. ^{[14] X Research Source}

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Consider reporting to authorities without leaving your identity. Even if you decide never to return home, there may be others who are suffering abuse or neglect just like you. Especially if you have siblings, consider using a pay phone or borrowing a friend’s phone to report it to the police or a child protection center.

National switchboard for child protection in Vietnam: phone number 111
Counseling and support services for children: call 1800 1567

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Plan ahead about work to earn a living. As a minor, even if you work in a fast food restaurant, your parents’ consent is required, along with other information such as your address and national ID number. Then there comes a time when you run out of food supplies and carry-on money. You will need to find a source of income to make a living. When applying for a job, suggest that you’re looking for a “underground” paid job, which means you’ll be secretly paid directly by your employer, usually cash. Some of the “underground” jobs include:

Desk assistant (restaurant)
Dish washing
Gardening/landscape construction
Tutor
Child care
Help move furniture
Painting and repairing houses ^{[15] X Research source}

Live far away from home

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Escape. Leave the house when you are unseen and make sure you are undetected afterwards. For example, you might call the school to ask for sick leave and hide on the go, or consider leaving the house after everyone has gone to bed. So you will have a few hours to get away from that place. Try to go as far as possible before stopping to rest. To make it easier to be detected, you should get out of the city and go to another province. ^{[16] X Research Source}

Buses or trains can get you far without spending a lot of money. Wear a brimmed hat or a hooded top to cover your face and not be detected in surveillance equipment.
To limit your chances of being recognized, color your hair normally but different from your natural hair color and/or get a haircut. Make sure your new hairstyle/hair color doesn’t look sloppy to avoid people questioning your appearance if you’re not careful.
Bring clothes that are rarely worn or never worn. You can buy cheap new clothes at thrift stores so you don’t have to wear recognizable clothes.

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Always pay attention to the food first. Food should be a priority. You can fill a bottle with water at any nearby sink, but pay attention to the “Non-Drinkable” note as the water there is not intended for drinking. Take any food you can find (but make sure it’s edible) or give it to someone; Remember to eat before the food goes bad, even if you’re not hungry.

However, you should never take food from a place or person that seems suspicious. If someone or something looks suspicious, or if the food smells strange, accept the food, but throw it away when the person leaves. Don’t refuse or throw it away in front of them, because they might hurt you if you do. Trust your intuition. If something doesn’t seem right, chances are it’s not. For example, if someone gives you some vegetables and makes you feel nauseous just looking at them, don’t eat them. When meeting a person or going to a place that looks decent and safe on the surface but you have a feeling of doubt, then don’t eat what is offered. There may be bad people intentionally poisoning you. Do not drink any invited drinks under any circumstances. Drinks may be drugged or contain toxins. Only drink water from potable public taps.

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Maintain good hygiene. This is especially important when you’re starting to look for work, but a clean appearance also helps keep you out of the spotlight when the police collect vagrants. Stay away from dangerous places that could be the site of robbers or rapists, such as alleyways or secluded areas in parks. Hygiene is important, but you should try to look unattractive to avoid falling prey to predators.

Dress like you’re going to school or somewhere casual, not like you’re going to a party. Clothes with lots of pockets will give you plenty of room to keep your essentials.

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Never engage in prostitution or use alcohol or drugs. Never accept an offer to have sex with anyone for money. You could get hit, robbed, or maybe the person won’t pay after you’re done with you. He or she may wait until you are vulnerable before luring you deeper. Money must be spent on necessities for survival; Don’t squander your meager money on alcohol, drugs or cigarettes.

Runners or other homeless people may abuse alcohol or drugs, and they may even invite you to share. Please decline their invitation. You won’t be able to defend yourself when you’re drunk, high, or out of control.

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Identify places that can meet your basic needs. Public or private toilets are not the most comfortable, but they are also places where you can do personal hygiene. Have your answers ready if someone asks. Explanations like, “My mom and I just went to my grandparents’ house all day, so we stopped in here to tidy up a bit,” might help you avoid suspicion by the police. Girls can use Nair facial hair removal cream to keep their face bright. Try not to raise suspicion when using the restroom as usual.

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Keep safe. There are many tools that you can use to stay safe, such as a rape whistle, pepper spray, or a multi-tool that can be used in an emergency or self-defense situation. Hide these tools in an inconspicuous but easily accessible place. Money should be kept in your underwear, not in socks or bras because that’s where many people will notice first. ^{[17] X Research Source}^{[18] X Research Source}

If someone says, “I saw you had money last night,” say it’s already spent, even if you still have some left.
Carry a conspicuous bag or purse with a small amount of money inside. That way, if you get robbed, the robbers will only take that money. ^{[19] X Research Source}
If you run out of money to buy food, be careful when asking for money. This action will draw attention and in some cases anger other homeless people. In addition, it is also illegal to ask for money in some places.
Supermarkets that offer food samples are a great place to find food without being noticed. If someone asks, you can say that you are waiting for your mother.

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No theft. This behavior is not only illegal and wrong, but also attracts the attention of others, including the police. Theft can have more serious consequences than just being sent back to where you’ve been hiding.

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Have explanations ready. People may ask if they see you prowling during class, or brushing your teeth in a public restroom. Don’t respond immediately with something that comes to mind. You should prepare a narrative that explains your situation and stick to it to avoid inconsistencies that raise suspicion. Think in advance what questions people might ask when listening to your story and prepare reasonable answers.

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Do not use cell phones. Maybe you will be located after running away. However, cell phones can save you in an emergency. You can turn off your phone to avoid being tracked or change the SIM card to a new one. ^{[20] X Research Source}

Advice

Only run away from home if you have no other choice. This decision can have a serious and permanent impact on your life. You could be hurt, or even killed, without the protection of your community, friends and family. If you are being abused, call the police.
Don’t wiggle, stammer, or hesitate when lying. This attitude can make people not believe what you say.
Speak only when someone is talking to you, and remember to stick to a story that tells who you are, what you do, etc. You probably don’t want people to find out your story is fake every time. you tell a different version.
Never hang around in one place for too long. You probably don’t want to be seen as a nuisance, or make people wonder what you’re doing.
Remember that you need to be as “stealth” as possible. Don’t attract attention. Try to look like a normal passerby. This also means maintaining good hygiene, wearing clean and appropriate clothing.
Always be ready to defend yourself. You might consider working out to get stronger before you leave the house.
Never lie or run away from the police. This will make you suspicious and give the impression that you are doing something illegal. If you are questioned by the police, you will have to reveal the truth. Behaviors like lying, fighting, or running away can get you into more serious trouble.
Pack essentials such as flashlights, blankets, etc. Remember to bring as much non-perishable foods as possible (such as biscuits, dried fruit, dried food, canned food).
If you can’t dye your hair or change your natural hairstyle, you can consider wearing a natural wig. It can help you hide your identity and look like a different person.
Equip pepper spray instead of weapons or weapon-like objects such as pocket knives, as it is illegal to carry weapons.
If you’re going to run away, don’t go to your relative’s, because they might call your parents.
Bring a wallet but don’t leave money in it. If you ever get robbed, you can show them your empty wallet and tell them you don’t have any money (even if you don’t).

Warning

Always prepare appropriate attire. Bring a thick and warm coat, sturdy shoes (boots/sneakers) and some clothes to wear in the heat.
Unless you’re running away from home due to abuse (in which case you should call the police), leave a note so your parents don’t think you’ve been kidnapped. Simply write, just say that you have left the house.
Don’t be too confident. Overconfidence will make you an easy target and also make you easier to find.
If you call for help at the shelter, your parents will be contacted if they recognize you. It is best to go to a shelter outside the city where you live so that no one will recognize you.
Try to find a safe place to sleep overnight. You should not wander at night, because the risk of you encountering bad guys will be very high.
Do not bring weapons or anything that looks like a weapon. You should only keep pepper spray. It is illegal to carry a weapon and someone will call the police if they see it. The police will assume you are a smuggler, murderer or criminal.

Things you need

Cash
Coins for washing clothes at the laundromat
Medical first aid kit
Raincoat
Sleeping bag
Socks
Clothes to change (x2)
Underwear (x4)
Toothbrush/toothpaste
Sanitary napkin
Comb
Bottle of water
Non-perishable food
Pepper spray
Deodorant products
Lighter/match (optional)
Flashlight (plus extra batteries)
2 in 1 shampoo and conditioner (optional)
Face towel (optional)
Small travel pillow (optional)
Razor/hair removal cream (optional)
Notebook and pencil/pen (optional)
Umbrella
List of phone numbers of people you trust
“Message” from “parent/guardian” for all to see if in doubt

Steps