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How to Deal with Overwhelming People

December 3, 2023 by admin Category: How To

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Almost all of us have known someone who specializes in making things more stressful and uncomfortable. Trying to prove that they are tough and demanding won’t do you any good – they may not even notice the problem. No matter what the cause – they have a mental illness or other deeper problems, you can learn how to deal with people who are overpowered to help put your mind at ease.

Table of Contents

  • Steps
    • Handling Conflicts
    • Accept the Situation
    • Protect Yourself
    • Dealing With Each Personality Type
  • Advice

Steps

Handling Conflicts

Image titled Become a Nicer Person to Others Step 12

Image titled Become a Nicer Person to Others Step 12

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Don’t make excuses. Stay calm, and remember that you will never be able to win against someone who is outrageous – there has to be a reason for them to be called “outrageous”. To them, you are the problem, and nothing can convince them to see the story from your point of view. That person will always think: all your opinions are meaningless because you are at fault anyway.

  • Think about what you are going to say and the purpose of the conversation. Don’t react impatiently when offended by them. You don’t have to make any excuses to them.
  • When talking, use the subject “I” instead of “you”. For example, don’t say, “You’re wrong.” Say something like, “I don’t think that is true.”
Image titled Tell Someone People Can't Trust Them Step 12

Image titled Tell Someone People Can't Trust Them Step 12

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Keep your distance, distract and defuse conflict. Staying calm in the heat of the moment is very important for self-defense. If you say angry words, or have outbursts of emotions such as crying, the overpowered people will have more excuses to make things difficult for you. Don’t pay attention to their actions, and don’t let yourself get emotional with what they do.

  • Take the emotion out of the situation and deal with it soberly. The goal is not to let your emotions show when you talk to them, keep your distance, and don’t let what they say upset you.
  • Direct the conversation to a more positive topic by focusing on things that are not the cause of the argument. [1] X Research Source Talk about the weather, fishing, their family – anything that can distract them from the argument and not cause more conflict.
  • Remember: anything you say or do in anger can be used against you. If you find it okay to endure angry judgments for decades to come, feel free to react to them. Overwhelmed people often like you to say something bad to prove you’re a bad person. [2] X Research Source
  • Don’t judge them as right or wrong, no matter how absurd they may be. Judgment will only make you feel worse.
Image titled Break Up With Someone Who Is Threatening Suicide Step 2

Image titled Break Up With Someone Who Is Threatening Suicide Step 2

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Avoid arguing with them. If possible, don’t disagree with people who are too mean. Find a way to agree or ignore them. Arguing will only make you express your feelings and say angry words. It also makes it harder for you to think clearly and to come up with rational responses. [3] X Research Sources

  • Overwhelmed people love to argue, so when you agree with them or what they say, you don’t give them what they want. If you get called “Bad!” for example, go ahead and admit that you behaved badly at the time. This will eliminate the hysteria. [4] X Research Sources
Image titled Deal With a Difficult Spouse Step 17

Image titled Deal With a Difficult Spouse Step 17

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You have to realize that you can’t talk to them properly. It’s almost impossible to have a polite conversation with outrageous people – at least for you. Think back to times when you’ve tried to discuss your relationship with them, and sometimes you’ve been blamed by them. [5] X Research Sources

  • Be quiet or have fun with them whenever possible. Remember, you can’t “change” crippled people. Such people cannot and will never listen to reason.
  • Avoid arguing with them. Don’t meet that person alone. Always go with a third person. If your over-the-top audience objected, just ask for it.
Image titled Be Quiet During Class Step 5

Image titled Be Quiet During Class Step 5

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Ignore them. Overwhelmed people love attention, so when they know you’re not paying attention to them, they’ll find someone else to mess with. Stay out of their business and don’t talk to them – or about them.

  • Overwhelmed people often have childish outbursts of anger. You shouldn’t care about them unless their anger turns dangerous and threatening to you. Try to stay away from extreme people, or at least, don’t give them a reason to be angry.
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Image titled React when Insulted or Teased Step 11

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Ask thought-provoking questions. Ask them related questions like “What’s wrong?” or “Why do you feel that way?” might be useful. This shows: you are interested in the conversation and want to find the cause of the conflict. Trying to see the problem from the cripple’s point of view can help you come to a better conclusion.

  • Remember: the aggrieved person may respond to your question by trying to complicate things, such as fighting, blaming, changing the subject, or more.
Image titled Cope With Feelings of Love for the Wrong Person at the Wrong Time Step 16

Image titled Cope With Feelings of Love for the Wrong Person at the Wrong Time Step 16

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Distract yourself. If the overpowered person is about to make you unbearable, you should get out of the situation immediately. Maybe the person is trying to drive you crazy, so prove it: they don’t affect you at all. Walking away or doing something else will calm you down.

  • Count silently from 1 to 10 if necessary.
  • If the person is still acting too much, ignore them. That person will have to stop when they see that they can’t provoke you.
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Image titled Become a Nicer Person to Others Step 4

Image titled Become a Nicer Person to Others Step 4

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Be confident. State your point of view confidently and look the other person in the eye when you talk. You shouldn’t be weak to them. If you keep looking at the ground or somewhere behind them, the person may think you are weak. You should show that you are a reasonable person but not weak.
Image titled Deal With Less Intelligent People Step 4

Image titled Deal With Less Intelligent People Step 4

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Change tactics. Sometimes you just can’t let things go, so treat it like a game. Learn the tactics of crippled people and come up with a strategy to deal with them. Then you will realize what works and what doesn’t. Moreover, you will feel better knowing that you are always a few steps ahead of them, no matter what they do, they can’t beat you. But remember: the end goal of this is to help you feel better, not to win them over.

  • If that person shows up and whispers bad things to you in public, they think you won’t dare to react. Then say it out loud: “Do you really want to talk about that?”. This will take the person by surprise and not dare to behave badly there again.
  • Always anticipate the consequences of your actions if things don’t go as planned.
  • If the person keeps trying to reach you, don’t get upset. Remember what happened and create a different strategy for next time.
  • They won’t be able to pick a fight with you if you can predict their next words or actions.
Image titled Look Approachable Step 5

Image titled Look Approachable Step 5

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Pay attention to your body language. Always pay attention to your gestures and facial expressions when around those people. Body language shows our emotions a lot. You shouldn’t accidentally reveal your feelings. This will also help you maintain your composure, and possibly calm the other person.

  • Speak softly and move calmly.
  • Avoid using aggressive body language, such as eye contact, aggressive gestures, pointing or facing the other person. Keep a calm face, don’t shake your head and don’t invade their personal space. [6] X Research Source

Accept the Situation

Image titled Read an Ex's Body Language Step 3

Image titled Read an Ex's Body Language Step 3

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See if the problem is in harmony. Even though the person may be able to communicate normally with others, he or she may still overreact to you. There are people who simply cannot get along. Maybe you’re both fine, but when you’re together, the two of you “ruffle” each other.

  • When that person says “Everyone loves me,” they are blaming you. The way they treat others has nothing to do with this. The problem lies in the way the two of you communicate with each other. Remember: blaming each other will not change the truth.
Image titled Help Loved Ones with Histrionic Personality Disorder Step 22

Image titled Help Loved Ones with Histrionic Personality Disorder Step 22

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Avoid inciting an “overwhelming” attitude. We often react in proportion to everything around us. As a result, you may also inadvertently display attitudes that you detest. You may also engage in provocative or unreasonable behavior in response to crippled people. Be restrained when you realize you’re about to do this, and try not to imitate those behaviors.
Image titled Avoid Caring About What People Say Step 3

Image titled Avoid Caring About What People Say Step 3

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Let’s see what we can learn. Overwhelmed people often have valuable life experiences. After interacting with crippled people, you’ll find it easier to communicate with others. Hold your ground, and realize that things that seem crazy to you may be someone else’s only way of handling a situation. Think of these interactions as a way to build on your strengths, such as flexibility, grace, and selflessness.

  • Never judge a person’s maturity by their age, intelligence or social status.
Image titled Understand Your Emotions Step 3

Image titled Understand Your Emotions Step 3

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Be prepared for emotional changes. If you suddenly convince a crippled person that they’ve made a mistake, that person can have a sudden breakdown. Instead of believing that he is always right, that person will think: if I am wrong now, then I will be wrong forever. This is how they deal to win sympathy from others.

  • Some people will react abnormally to surprise or embarrass you. Maybe it’s because the person didn’t anticipate this either. Don’t let these unexpected behaviors intimidate you. [7] X Research Sources
  • Don’t let these people confuse you by acting like they’re the victims. If they truly feel guilty for what they did, respond positively but don’t let them manipulate you in this way.
Image titled Deal With Impossible People Step 15

Image titled Deal With Impossible People Step 15

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Focus on the good points. Many people have great strengths, let’s focus on that. Maybe there are things they do really well, or maybe there was a time when the two of you used to have a good chat. If you can’t think of anything positive, say to yourself, “Everybody is precious” or “God loves her” to restrain yourself – even if you don’t love or respect her. very much.
Image titled Date a Man with Kids Step 6

Image titled Date a Man with Kids Step 6

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Let’s talk to someone. If you know someone who understands (a good friend, relative, counselor, etc.), talk to them. Maybe that person will understand you and will help you feel better. It is best that the person knows nothing about the crippled person’s personality and has never been in similar situations (e.g. co-workers).

  • Pour it all out in your journal or join an online community if necessary.

Protect Yourself

Image titled Cope With Feelings of Love for the Wrong Person at the Wrong Time Step 6

Image titled Cope With Feelings of Love for the Wrong Person at the Wrong Time Step 6

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Protect your self-esteem. Maintain a good image for someone who tries to smear you, it will help. Instead of listening to what the person has to say, focus on the people who respect you and make you feel good. Remember: crippled people want to hurt you in order to feel better about themselves.

  • Understand that it’s the cripples’ problem – not yours. This can be a bit difficult because crippled people know how to blame and make you feel guilty. But if you take responsibility for your mistakes and try to improve yourself, you’re not a freak at all.
  • When that person intentionally says something to hurt you, remember that they are only doing it because they want to be praised. And you don’t need their recognition.
  • If their insults have no truth in them, just ignore them. You are not as bad as they would like you and others to believe.
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Image titled Get Your Friend to Leave His Girlfriend Step 3

Image titled Get Your Friend to Leave His Girlfriend Step 3

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Please protect your privacy. Overwhelming people often find ways to use personal information against you, no matter how petty. They can fabricate a whole story and make you a terrible person based on your simple words. As experts at manipulating others, cripples know how to get you to open up and tell them stories. [8] X Research Sources

  • Don’t tell them anything personal, even if they act normal or act like friends to you. What you say or share at that time can unexpectedly harm you in your personal or professional life.
Image titled Get out of a Depression Step 2

Image titled Get out of a Depression Step 2

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Be kind and love their bad sides. Be a “comfortable” person – be an example of forgiveness, patience, humility, and kindness. Always a know-it-all. Evaluate all sides of an issue before jumping to conclusions.

  • Just as bad behavior affects us negatively, when you become a selfless, patient, and kind person, you can also change others for the better.
  • Realize that you are not perfect either. You don’t have to always do the right thing, but always try. Always respect others. If you don’t get the respect of that cripple, understand that it’s their problem, not yours.
Image titled Deal With Your Friend's Boyfriend Hitting on You Step 14

Image titled Deal With Your Friend's Boyfriend Hitting on You Step 14

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Don’t focus on that person. Even though you can’t avoid that outrageous person every day, you shouldn’t think about them when the two of you aren’t seeing each other. Constantly being stressed about that person is like wasting your precious time on them, when they don’t care about you at all. Do other things, make new friends. That way, you won’t waste time just thinking about their words and actions.
Image titled Deal With Impossible People Step 13

Image titled Deal With Impossible People Step 13

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Maybe you are dealing with an abusive person. Mentally abusive people can use words and actions to make you lose resistance. They often use disparaging words, criticize, dominate, blame, demand and isolate you emotionally, thereby making you dependent on them. Don’t let what they say control who you are. What they say or do may be rooted in an unhappy childhood, or other problems from the past and they are taking that out on you. [9] X Research Source

  • The best thing you can do is be friendly and kind, even though the person may behave badly to attract negative attention.
  • If the person is lonely but doesn’t know how to get attention, they will appreciate what you are doing and will change.
  • If they are by nature mean and like to anger others, what you do will make them angry because it is impossible to anger you. In the end, they will have to leave you alone.
Image titled Help Loved Ones with Histrionic Personality Disorder Step 1

Image titled Help Loved Ones with Histrionic Personality Disorder Step 1

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Set limits. Set rules about what you can and cannot accept in this relationship. There are topics, events, or people that the two of you should not talk about, or behaviors that the two of you should avoid. It can also be helpful to sit back and let that crippled friend know the right things to do, and the consequences of crossing the line. Let them choose to accept those rules, or not.

  • Write down a few thoughts, and consider your needs and desires. Sit down with the person and talk. If they interrupt, stop them and keep talking. Let’s be honest. Provide an ultimatum if necessary, but focus on the benefits of continuing the relationship and changing bad behaviors.
  • If you decide to stay in this relationship, keep it to yourself. [10] X Research Resources Find and focus on a hobby, join a support group or focus on your religion.
  • Be consistent with the consequences when limits are broken. Don’t let anything go easily. If you say you will leave, then you will leave.
Image titled Heal from Emotional Abuse Step 6

Image titled Heal from Emotional Abuse Step 6

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Break a relationship. Eventually, you’ll have to cut ties with that cripple too. Even if it’s a family member, you’ll have to avoid them from time to time. A long-term relationship with a crippled person is not in your favor. Cut ties with them as soon as possible. [11] X Research Source

  • Stay away from them right after the breakup. No matter how much you love them, or even if the person convinces you that they have changed, you shouldn’t go back.
  • If you can’t break up with them right now, do so in your heart, then you can officially let go of that person later.
  • Letting go of a relationship with a cripple can be painful at first, but after that, you’ll feel liberated once you’ve broken old habits.

Dealing With Each Personality Type

Image titled Be a Cynic Step 8

Image titled Be a Cynic Step 8

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Find the problem between you and the person. Everyone has personalities that others cannot explain. Some people are clingy, controlling, pretending to be the victim, passive-aggressive, overdoing or very competitive. If you know which trait of that crippled person conflicts with yours, you can find more specific ways to deal with them. [12] X Research Source

  • Clings are always insecure, like to be noticed and loved because they feel weak, and always idolize strong people. [13] X Research Source
  • Controlling people are usually perfectionists, they always have to be right and often blame others for their actions. [14] X Research Source
  • Competitive people are aggressive and will treat every relationship, conversation, and activity as a contest to prove that they are the best. [15] X Research Source
  • Passive-aggressors often indirectly show displeasure by implicitly saying what they feel. A good example is the sentence: “Don’t worry, I’m fine”, when you know all too well that if you continue, you will be in trouble.
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Image titled Recover from an Emotional Affair Step 13

Image titled Recover from an Emotional Affair Step 13

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Realize the things that don’t work. There are things that work for certain types of people and don’t work for others. You’ll need to try and fail a few times to know what to do and not to do with an overpowered person. It’s also possible that there’s nothing you can do to make the relationship any better.

  • Avoiding clingy people will only make them try harder. However, frankly rejecting them turns them into your enemies. If you don’t show anything, they get hurt again. [16] X Research Source
  • For control freaks, you can’t prove that you’re right and they’re wrong. The person has to be right, and the fact that you do a better job than them won’t stop the perfectionists from criticizing you. [17] X Research Source
  • Competitive people will use the weaknesses they see in you against you, so when around them, don’t show emotion. If you resist and try to win them over, they will either abandon you or never forgive you. [18] X Research Sources
  • Don’t agree with people who complain or try to appease them. Then they will get angry again for something else.
  • Victims want you to feel sorry for them. Don’t sympathize and don’t let them make excuses. Be realistic and offer to help them in other ways. [19] X Research Source
Image titled Deal With Family Problems Step 5

Image titled Deal With Family Problems Step 5

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Find useful things. Along with certain types of people, you can find some ways to deal with negativity. Use their strengths to resolve misunderstandings, relieve stress, and improve weaknesses. Working with such people can produce very positive results.
Image titled Be a Leader Step 9

Image titled Be a Leader Step 9

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Deal with clingy, controlling, and competitive types. Understand why they always act the way they do. Clingy people always need to be guided in a responsible way to help them gain confidence. Controlling people feel insecure and afraid of their own weaknesses. Competitive people care a lot about their self-image, so they are often more friendly and generous when they are recognized as the best.

  • Show clingy people how to do things and let them do it on their own. Don’t let them convince you that they can’t do it because you do better. Create situations where you need help and ask for them. [20] X Research Sources
  • Don’t be afraid or heed the words of those who like to control. Take note of the times when you get it right, but don’t argue with them if they don’t admit it. [21] X Research Source
  • You can let the competitors win. If you’re having a discussion and they just won’t back down, accept that and ask for more time to figure things out. [22] X Research Source
Image titled Resist Cheating on Your Significant Other Step 12

Image titled Resist Cheating on Your Significant Other Step 12

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Deal with people who are egotistical, like to complain, or like to be the victim. Understand that arrogant people just need to feel heard. People who complain often get angry when they see unresolved problems and they also need to be heard. People who like to play the victim always feel that bad things are only happening to them, and they use that to explain their failures.

  • If you come across a conceited person, just listen to them. [23] X Research Sources
  • Tolerate complainers, acknowledge their feelings, and always avoid them as much as possible. [24] X Research Sources
  • Look closely at the “victims’ excuses for being late or making mistakes and behave like everyone else without guilt. You can give them advice, but don’t let your emotions get in the way. [25] X Research Sources
  • Image titled Help Loved Ones with Histrionic Personality Disorder Step 8

    Image titled Help Loved Ones with Histrionic Personality Disorder Step 8

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    Deal with fake people and passive aggression. Fake people love to get attention and will often do whatever it takes to get it. They have to live in a prestigious place, dress elegantly, and send their children to high-class schools. Passive-aggressors are often hostile because they don’t know how to express their desires rationally.

    • Regardless of gender, fake people are often nicknamed “trouble queens”. You should avoid getting caught up in the troubling tragedies that these people tell. Just listen to them but keep your distance.
    • Deal with passive-aggressive people by being precise about the actions and situations that are causing the problem. Then, practice solving the problem by not reacting to their hostility. Set boundaries and encourage them to say what they want and how to express it candidly. [26] X Research Sources
  • Advice

    • If you think you’re dealing with a mean person, you should also make sure that you’re not such a freak yourself. Evaluate the opinions of others openly. Hold on to your opinion, but remember: just because it’s your opinion doesn’t mean it’s right.
    • Stay calm and aware, but don’t be sarcastic when you encounter unpleasant people at work. You may lose your job or be criticized, so act professionally.
    X

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    Almost all of us have known someone who specializes in making things more stressful and uncomfortable. Trying to prove that they are tough and demanding won’t do you any good – they may not even notice the problem. No matter what the cause – they have a mental illness or other deeper problems, you can learn how to deal with people who are overpowered to help put your mind at ease.

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