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Do you know someone who just can’t seem to speak the truth? There are people who lie to make people think better of them or to get what they want, there are people who really believe what they say. Whatever the case, confronting the liar is an effective way to start dealing with their bad behavior. It’s important to remember, you don’t have the power to change other people – after all, all you can do is tell the truth. If you want to know more about dealing with liars, read on.
Steps
Assess situation
- Check how the person behaves when you ask about their date of birth or hometown, then compare it to their behavior when you ask a more difficult question, like if she has slept in the past. with your boyfriend or falsified company numbers. If the person is telling the truth, they won’t show any signs of stress when answering more difficult questions.
- Forget the advice you’ve probably heard, that the sign of not making eye contact shows someone is lying; It is in fact from this anecdote that many liars have intentionally made eye contact. [1] X Research Source
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- When lying, people’s bodies often show stress unconsciously. Watch for the following signs:
- A fake smile is only on the lips, not on the eyes.
- The voice has a higher pitch than usual.
- Pupil dilation . [2] X Research Source
- Blink very slowly (and blink quickly when you’ve finished speaking)
- Restless foot movements , such as toe beats or foot movements.
- Touching your face , such as repeatedly covering your mouth, eyes, or nose.
- If someone always lies every time you ask why his dad is always away, why he didn’t graduate from high school, or why he won’t talk to someone, maybe The answers to these questions are “none of your business”. Unless you and that person have a close relationship, you don’t have the right to know every detail about someone else’s life.
- However, if the person often lies for no reason, even about seemingly trivial things, they may have a habit of lying. Their lying behavior does not follow a pattern, so you will find it difficult to sympathize with their purpose of hiding the truth.
- Is the person just defending himself from talking too much? If so, it’s not a big deal.
- Is the person lying to manipulate others? Do people base their decisions on what the person says without realizing they are being duped? This is an issue that needs to be addressed.
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- Is the person lying to cover up bad behavior, such as stealing, cheating, or hurting others? This behavior has a very serious impact.
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Facing a liar
- Confronting a liar will be much easier if you gather “clear” evidence, such as emails or paperwork, that contradicts what the person says.
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- If you rely on other people’s words to uncover lies, try to find many people instead of just one.
- Don’t call that person a liar. Like I said, it’s better to be gentle first. Often the person will be embarrassed to be found lying and will stop.
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- Usually people are embarrassed about this, and they will probably commit to telling the truth from now on.
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- Habitual liars may admit that they are addicted to lying and ask for your help to stop the bad behavior. You may have to confront them many times until they get rid of the bad habit; For some it is a never ending battle.
- Pathological liars and antisocial personality disorder won’t budge when you confront them to clear things up. Lying is an essential part of these people’s personalities.
Maya Diamond, MA
Love and Marriage Counselor
Maya Diamond is a love and marriage counselor in Berkeley, CA. She has 11 years of experience in counseling conflicted couples to regain stability, heal past wounds, and create a lasting, loving union. She received her Master’s degree in Experimental Psychology from the California Institute of Integrative Studies in 2009.
Love and Marriage Counselor
You can seek counseling if you are in a relationship with a liar. Maya Diamond, dating and relationship expert says, “If you see your partner lying, let them know your observations, share how you feel and suggest how they would handle a similar situation in the future. If it’s a serious lie, maybe you should go to couple therapy to work through a break in trust or feelings of betrayal and heal the wound in the relationship. .”
Dealing with the consequences
- Don’t be haunted by that person’s lies. Make sure you know the truth. Good liars have a knack for telling the truth, and it’s important that you distinguish the truth from fabrications.
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- End your relationship with the liar if the situation gets out of hand. Don’t let yourself get caught up in their problems. At some point, you may need to let go of a toxic relationship. After you’ve done all you can, cut them off and start healing yourself.
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Advice
- When dealing with a liar, focus on talking about the betrayal of trust and how it affects your relationship.
- Do not start a war, as this may worsen the situation.
- Stay away from liars.
- Think about what causes them to lie. Maybe they want attention, and that’s why they can’t always deny it, or maybe they have problems they don’t dare to face.
- Just tell the truth. Liars hate hearing the truth, because then they are exposed to reality and forced to give in.
- Listen carefully when the person speaks. Liars often slip and tell their story more than once, and if you listen carefully you will notice the contradiction.
- Don’t make important decisions based on what the liar tells you.
- Liars with the intention of harming you can speak to the point of turning nearly everyone against you. You are forced to expose the liar and let everyone know the truth. Cold liars will not care at all about the person harmed by their words.
- Try to understand what caused the person to lie and act accordingly. Help them if you can. If not, avoid it.
- Be careful when unmasking a liar, especially if the person is violent. Sometimes these people go on a rampage to avoid telling the truth, or they may twist your words, provoke you, and try to slander you with a lie.
Warning
- Anger and harsh words only increase hatred and prove their lies about you true. Do not fall for that person’s trick when you make yourself small, because this is the desire of a liar who specializes in backstabbing and secretly harming others.
wikiHow is a “wiki” site, which means that many of the articles here are written by multiple authors. To create this article, 66 people, some of whom are anonymous, have edited and improved the article over time.
This article has been viewed 40,581 times.
Do you know someone who just can’t seem to speak the truth? There are people who lie to make people think better of them or to get what they want, there are people who really believe what they say. Whatever the case, confronting the liar is an effective way to start dealing with their bad behavior. It’s important to remember, you don’t have the power to change other people – after all, all you can do is tell the truth. If you want to know more about dealing with liars, read on.
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