How to Cry and Release Pressure

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This article was co-written by Kelli Miller, LCSW, MSW. Kelli Miller is a psychotherapist, author, and TV/radio presenter based in Los Angeles, California. Kelli is currently in private practice and specializes in family relationships, love marriage, depression, anxiety, gender, parenting and so on. Kelli also runs groups at The Villa. The Treatment Center is for people who are recovering from alcohol and drug addiction. As an author, she received the Next Generation Indie Book Award for “Living with ADHD: A True Book for Children” and she is also the author of “Profess Kelli’s Guide to Finding a Husband” “. Kelli is the host of “The Dr. Debra and Therapist Kelli Show” on LA Talk Radio, you can see her work on Instagram @kellimillertherapy. She received her Master of Social Work degree from the University of Pennsylvania and a diploma. Bachelor of Science in Sociology/Medical from the University of Florida.

There are 7 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 66,698 times.

How long has it been since you cried a real battle? Crying is a very effective way to relieve stress and improve mood. In case you haven’t cried for a long time, chances are you’ll forget how to cry. Go to a quiet place, free yourself from distractions, and let yourself into the deep emotions that will bring you back to balance. Refer to the steps below to help tears fall naturally,

Table of Contents

Let the tears fall

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Find a suitable place to cry. Most people who have trouble crying prefer to be alone, away from others so that it can be easier to live with their own true feelings without worrying about what others are thinking. There’s nothing wrong with crying in front of other people, but it’s more comfortable to cry alone.

If your bedroom is a private, quiet place, it’s a good choice.
If your home is crowded, try driving to a private place where you can cry. But make sure you can exercise restraint while driving there and back; Crying while driving can be very dangerous.
Crying in the shower is also a good option because then no one can hear you crying.
Going for a walk outside can also help clear your mind and process your emotions. Find a private spot in the park or on the beach.

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Shake off all preoccupations. Many people often push their emotions aside and find ways to disperse their sadness so they don’t have to cry. This is very effective in keeping you from crying for months or years. When you start to feel sad, do you tend to turn on the TV and spend the evening watching a favorite show? The next time you start to feel your mood go down, let the emotion run its course. That was the first step to crying out loud.

There are many different types of distractions. You can stay late at work, spend time going out instead of being alone, or read the electronic newspaper until you fall asleep. Think about what you will do when you are in a bad mood, stop it all and focus on your feelings.

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Think deeply about what makes you sad. Instead of letting the thoughts pass as if it were something unimportant, focus on the emotions swirling around in your mind. Think clearly, don’t dismiss them.

Think hard about what made you sad. Think about whether you wish it didn’t happen, how your life was before, or how your life will change from now on. Let yourself understand and feel the loss..
Whatever strong emotion is making you want to cry, think through it and allow the emotion to live within you. Observe how tired it is for you, and how much relief it would be if the problem were resolved.

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Let the emotions culminate until you can cry. Instead of trying to hold back about the pain, let your emotions release when you start to feel a little tight in your throat. Keep thinking about what you wish hadn’t happened until the tears started to fall and you stood up and tried to resist.

Once you start to really cry it can be very difficult to stop. When you have felt all your sorrows have been washed away, stop crying.
A cry lasts an average of 6 minutes. ^{[1] X Research Source}

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When you’re done crying, try to feel if your mood has improved. If you’re like most people, you’ll probably find your brain liberated from the emotions that have been suppressed for so long. The joy may not come immediately, but at least you will be calmer, less anxious and ready to face problems. Hold those feelings, and make crying a habit, cry whenever you want.

According to one study, while 73% of men feel better after crying, this rate in women reaches 85%. ^{[2] X Research Source}
Consider the reasons for not feeling better after crying. It may be because you have been affected by the thought that crying is weak for a long time. If you feel embarrassed crying, remember that it is a completely natural and healthy response.

Feel free to cry

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Forget everything you know about crying. Have you been taught that brave people don’t cry? People who are taught to control and hide their emotions from a young age often have difficulty expressing their emotions as they get older. But crying is an essential part of life that improves psychological well-being. Crying can be an expression of sadness, pain, fear, happiness, or just an emotion, and it’s also the body’s most natural way of feeling emotions.

Men tend to have more difficulty releasing their emotions than women, mainly because they often keep their true feelings hidden. However, even if you don’t cry often, crying is a natural male reflex. The number of cries of boys and girls under 12 years old is similar. ^{[3] X Research Sources} By adulthood, men cry an average of 7 times per year, while women cry 47 times. ^{[4] X Research Sources}
Crying is not a sign of weakness. It’s just a way of expressing emotions that has nothing to do with decision making. Even if you’ve already predicted that you’ll cry, you can still take bold steps. In fact, crying helps process emotions and makes thoughts clearer.
Contrary to what you may have heard, crying isn’t just for babies. Children often cry because they do not yet know what is right and what is wrong. But as an adult, crying has always been a necessity.

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Understand the benefits of crying. Crying is a human way of releasing stressful emotions. When emotions are repressed and need to be released, crying is seen as a natural response of the body. ^{[5] X Research Source} What’s interesting here is that humans are the only mammals that can shed tears as a way to express emotions. Crying is a beneficial survival mechanism as follows:

Crying helps relieve stress and lowers blood pressure. Crying will help reduce health problems caused by extreme stress as well as high blood pressure in the long run. ^{[6] X Research Sources}
Crying helps flush out the toxins that build up when you’re sad. Certain chemicals will build up in the body during stress and then crying will help detox through tears, especially when crying when you can’t control your emotions. ^{[7] X Research Sources}
You can improve your mood immediately after crying. Not only is this obvious, it’s also a scientific fact. When you cry, the level of Manganese in the body will drop. Manganese accumulation is a cause of stress and anxiety, so crying is a natural way to ease emotional pain. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

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Find out why you have to keep your emotions in check. Once you know the benefits of crying, think about what stopped you from crying. If you haven’t been able to cry for a long time, you need to make an effort to cry to release your emotions.

If you think that crying shows negative aspects, try to change your perspective to crying that is completely beneficial for yourself.
If you have trouble expressing your emotions, crying is the perfect place to start. If you can release emotions in this way, expressing emotions will no longer be an obstacle.
When you try to suppress your emotions and stop yourself from crying, those feelings will still be there. They will make you angry and paralyzed.

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Allowing yourself to cry is also a way to take better care of yourself. This is a way to embrace your feelings instead of rejecting and pushing them away. When you cry you will be yourself. Allowing yourself the freedom to express your emotions will have a positive effect on your mental health. ^{[9] X Research Source}

Try re-imagining yourself as a child, struggling mentally to express your feelings, try to imagine yourself as a child. Think about how you used to be free to be yourself, that time you cried with regret when a good day was over or maybe when you fell off your bike and scratched your knee. The things that make you cry as an adult are very different from the things that made you cry as a child, but you can still work to regain that feeling of freedom to express your emotions.
Thinking about how you comfort others when they cry is also a good way. Have you ever advised them not to cry, to suppress their emotions? When your best friend was feeling down and started to cry, maybe you gave them a hug and encouraged them to let their frustrations out. Try to do this to yourself, not to blame yourself, this will help you feel more comfortable crying.

Things that take away tears

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Look at old photos. This is a surefire way to bring tears to your eyes if you’re grieving over a specific person, such as about your family or how big a change over time has been. Scroll through a collection of old photos or post pictures online and look at them for a long time. Remember the time you had with the people in the photo or maybe a favorite place of your own.

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Watch a sad movie. A movie with a sad plot can make you cry. Even if the actors are in a completely different situation than you, you will feel sadness and tears and they will also take away your tears. When you start to cry over a movie, direct your thoughts to your own story so you can come to terms with your own feelings. Here is a list of sad movies you can refer to:

Mulan incense
Stella Dallas
Break the wave
Sad Valentine’s Day
Rudy
Green mile
Schindler’s List
Titanic
Boy in striped pajamas
My girl
Marley and I
Book thief
Room
Romeo and Juliet
love diary

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Listen to sad music. A song that matches the mood is the perfect choice to release emotions. Picking up a great album or a song you’ve heard at some point in your life, or a remembrance song to listen to again is one of the best ways to bring tears to your eyes. If no favorite song or artist matches, why not listen to one of these sad songs:

“Not the Love We Dream Of” by Gary Numan
“Lost” by Gary Numan
“I’m So Lonesome I Could Cry” by Hank Williams
Johnny Cash’s “Hurt”
“Tears in Heaven” by Eric Clapton
“On My Own” by Les Misérables
“Jpene” by Dply Parton
“Say it Like You Mean It” – by Matchbook Romance
“I’ve Been Loving You Too Long” by Otis Redding
“How Could This Happen To Me” by Simple Plan
“I Know You Care” by Ellie Goulding
“Goodbye My Lover” by James Blunt
“Carry You Home” by James Blunt
“All By Myself” by Celine Dion
“My Heart Will Go On” by Celine Dion
“Young and Beautiful” by Lana Del Rey
“The Ice Is Getting Thinner” by Death Cab for Cutie
“Too Late” by M83
“With Light There is Hope” by Princess One Point Five
“Appogize” by One Republic
“Night Owl” by Gerry Rafferty
“Cry Like a Rainstorm” by Linda Ronstadt

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Write diary. Try putting down your pen and jotting down your own feelings. You can start by describing the cause of the emotions that are overflowing in your heart. Describe the details of the breakup, the last months of battling your father’s illness, or the loss of your job when the economy started to decline. Then, go deeper into how your life has changed after those events, what your mood is. Writing down memories can also bring tears to your eyes. ^{[10] X Research Source}

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If possible, talk to a friend. It’s very helpful to talk to others about things that make you sad, angry, or overwhelmed. Talk until you’ve calmed down or don’t want to cry anymore.

Advice

Tears don’t mean anything wrong, nor does it mean you’re weak. Tears are a symbol of strength. Remember: “We get up every time we fall.”
Talk and try to confide in the person closest to you when you’re feeling down. It could be a close friend or a family member. Always remember that crying is not a sign of weakness.
If you have time, do something you love to lift your mood after crying.
Instead of chasing the people around when you’re crying, talk to them.
Understand that time will pass and people won’t remember you ever cried.
Keep your face down or grab a book to cover your tears when forced to cry in class. Try not to hiccup or at least try not to snort and always carry tissues to wipe your tears as soon as they fall. You can also hide your teary eyes behind long hair or bangs.
Play some sad songs in your phone or music player while crying.
Listen to music alone if that makes you feel more comfortable.
Don’t be afraid to cry, because there’s nothing wrong with crying.
Remember that hurting yourself won’t make the pain any less.
Make sure you have tissues, a towel, or anything else that can absorb tears quickly to stop the tears from running down your desk or study table.
Crying does not mean weakness. Instead of trying to hold back, release it with tears. If you want, cry in front of someone as trusted as your mom or best friend.

Warning

Don’t cry in front of your enemies. Cry with someone you trust or when it’s just you.
Use a waterproof mascara if you think you might cry during your date.
You can get in trouble if you cry in a crowded area at school or work.

Things You Need

Tissue
A close friend or someone you trust
Face wash or makeup remover

Steps