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This article was co-written by Sari Eitches, MBE, MD. Sari Eitches is a general internist who runs Tower Integrative Health and Wellness in Los Angeles, California. She specializes in plant-based nutrition, weight management, women’s health, preventive medicine, and depression. She holds certifications from the American Board of Internal Medicine and the American Board of Integrative and Holistic Medicine. She holds a bachelor’s degree from the University of California, Berkeley, a doctorate from SUNY Upstate College of Medicine, and an MBE from the University of Pennsylvania. She completed her residency at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York and worked as an internist at the University of Pennsylvania.
There are 20 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 5,147 times.
When you don’t get enough sleep, you can’t stay awake. The consequences will not be good at all if there is unfortunately a misunderstanding. Arguments can happen when you no longer act calmly and care about people as usual. This can happen at work, in social situations, while exercising, or when you care for a newborn. In order not to utter words or take actions that you later regret, you need to learn to control your anger. It is also helpful to get to the root of your anger by identifying the cause of your anger. That way you’ll be able to handle situations more effectively even when you’re tired.
Steps
Control anger with immediate measures
- Tensed muscles, clenched jaws
- Headache and stomach ache
- Heart beat fast
- Feeling sweaty
- Red face
- Hands and whole body trembling
- Dizzy
- Stubborn
- Sad
- Disappointed
- Feeling guilty
- Angry
- Worry
- Defense position
- Inhale while counting to four, hold your breath while counting to four, and exhale while counting to four.
- Remember to breathe through your diaphragm instead of your chest. When you breathe through your diaphragm, your belly will rise (it can be felt if you put your hand on your stomach).
- Repeat this movement several times until you start to feel calmer.
- If you can’t leave, try turning your back and closing your eyes for a few minutes.
Monitor sleep deprivation
- Difficulty falling asleep at night (it may take 30 minutes or more).
- Or wake up in the middle of the night and can’t get back to sleep.
- Waking up too early in the morning.
- Not feeling well in the morning, no matter how much sleep you get.
- Sleepy all day.
- Suddenly fell asleep during the day.
- Snoring or snorting while sleeping, occasionally stopping breathing, or often startled during sleep.
- The feeling of numbness in the legs at night before going to sleep and disappearing when massaged.
- The muscles suddenly weaken when you are angry, scared, or laughing.
- Feeling like you can’t move when you wake up.
- Caffeine is always needed to wake up and stay awake during the day.
- You also need to track how you feel when you wake up in the morning (do you feel well? Or are you sleepy? or unsteady?) Track how you feel during the day.
- Talk to your doctor if you are concerned about these illnesses.
Understanding your anger
- You don’t have to use an expert scale to measure anger. You can create your own scale with a scale of one to ten, or zero to one hundred and use whichever scale works for you.
- What sparked your anger?
- Rate your anger level.
- What thoughts come to mind when you get angry?
- How did you react? How do others react to you?
- What was your mood before the tantrum?
- What symptoms do you feel in your body that indicate anger?
- Do you want to leave or take some action, such as banging on the door, banging on something or hitting someone, or do you say sarcastic words?
- How do you feel right after the incident?
- How do you feel a few hours after the incident?
- How was the case resolved?
- By tracking these facts, you can see what situations and triggers you’re sensitive to. From there you can try to avoid or guess when such situations will happen if you can’t avoid them.
- Unable to control the actions of others.
- When you see someone else not meeting your expectations.
- Unable to control everyday events, such as traffic jams.
- While being manipulated by someone.
- Get angry at yourself for some mistake.
- Hypersensitivity to incidents (due to poor cooperation or drowsiness)
- Too sensitive to coldness
- Rapid aging condition
- Emotional problems (loss of control, anxiety, panic attacks, depression)
- Irritability, sadness, decreased ability to cope with stress
- Poor judgment skills, poor concentration, and lack of decision-making ability
- The long-term effects of sleep deprivation can include obesity, heart disease or diabetes.
Express anger in a healthy way
- “I felt angry and hurt when he laughed during my presentation, like he was belittling my project. I didn’t know what was going on at the time, but he didn’t seem to care or value my efforts. Maybe I misunderstood. Can we clarify this?”
- “When you have time, you can…”
- “You will be of great help to me if…. Thank you, I appreciate it!”
- For example, if a coworker is talking on the phone so loudly that it’s difficult for you to work, you could make a suggestion like, “I have a suggestion for you, could you speak a little louder? Because the noise makes me unable to concentrate. Thank you very much”. [15] X Research Source
Take long-term measures
- Try to go to bed at the same time every night and wake up at the same time every morning. Regular sleep habits will benefit your health.
- Turn off all screens (television, phone, computer) at least half an hour before bedtime. Studies show that electronic screens stimulate the brain and can interfere with a good night’s sleep. [17] X Research Source
- If you’re having trouble sleeping, you need to talk to your doctor to find other remedies you can try.
- Start with deep breathing exercises. Find a place where you can sit quietly. Breathe in for a count of four, hold for a count of four, and exhale for a count of four. Make sure to breathe with your diaphragm instead of your chest. When breathing through your diaphragm, your abdomen should rise (you can feel it if you put your hand on your stomach). Do this several times until you feel calmer.
- Don’t worry if you find it difficult to meditate. Meditation is a combination of deep breathing exercises, visualization and mental practice. However, if you find it difficult to sit for long periods of time to meditate or feel uncomfortable when you meditate, you can simply start by taking deep breaths, and your body will create a calm response.
- Practicing meditation in a calm state will help you process your emotions in a healthier way. You can combine breathing exercises with visualization exercises. There is a simple way to do this. As you inhale, visualize a yellowish white light that is pleasant and makes you happy. Imagine that light entering your lungs and spreading throughout your body. As you exhale, push all shades of darkness – representing your anger and stress – out of your body.
- Start by taking a few deep breaths. Breathe in for a count of four, hold your breath for a count of four, and exhale for the same amount of time.
- Start with the muscles of the head and face. Tighten the muscles of your face, head, mouth and neck as much as you can, hold for 20 seconds, then release.
- Continue down to your lower body, stretching and then releasing your shoulders, arms, back, hands, abs, legs, feet, and toes.
- And now wiggle your toes, feeling the relaxation from your feet to your head.
- Take a few more deep breaths and enjoy the feeling of relaxation.
- Exercise will also help you sleep better.
- Anger management programs come in many different forms. [25] X Research Source For example, there are programs for teens, operators, police officers, and many others with different anger patterns and triggers.
- Consult a therapist about emotional coping skills and assertive communication training.
This article was co-written by Sari Eitches, MBE, MD. Sari Eitches is a general internist who runs Tower Integrative Health and Wellness in Los Angeles, California. She specializes in plant-based nutrition, weight management, women’s health, preventive medicine, and depression. She holds certifications from the American Board of Internal Medicine and the American Board of Integrative and Holistic Medicine. She holds a bachelor’s degree from the University of California, Berkeley, a doctorate from SUNY Upstate College of Medicine, and an MBE from the University of Pennsylvania. She completed her residency at Lenox Hill Hospital in New York and worked as an internist at the University of Pennsylvania.
There are 20 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 5,147 times.
When you don’t get enough sleep, you can’t stay awake. The consequences will not be good at all if there is unfortunately a misunderstanding. Arguments can happen when you no longer act calmly and care about people as usual. This can happen at work, in social situations, while exercising, or when you care for a newborn. In order not to utter words or take actions that you later regret, you need to learn to control your anger. It is also helpful to get to the root of your anger by identifying the cause of your anger. That way you’ll be able to handle situations more effectively even when you’re tired.
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