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Do you like someone but are always shy when you have something to say to them? Perhaps you fear rejection or worry that what you say is stupid. It’s okay, cheer up! Your chances aren’t as bad as you think (especially if you and your crush are already friends). Remember, if you do nothing, the chances are zero. Keep that in mind and be ready to start a conversation with someone you love without letting yourself be rejected!
Steps
Choose the right time
- Try to strike a balance to avoid over-preparedness. Your crush loves getting more attention from you, but they don’t want to feel like you’ve been thinking about them every second of the past three days. That’s a bit weird even if it’s true!
- Practice in front of the mirror. You have to know what you’re going to say, but don’t say it like you’ve rehearsed it. Imagine different situations where you had the opportunity to talk to someone you like, and rehearse in front of a mirror. The more prepared you are, the more confident you will be in the conversation.
- Speak in a fun way. Sure, you have to practice speaking in serious situations, but it can also be silly to make both of you laugh. The less serious you act, the more natural you will be when the time comes.
- “I noticed those movies in your notebook. I really like 80s movies. Do you like any movies?”
- Well, me and my friends are going to the soccer field after school. Would you like to join?”
- Look at your personal wall on Facebook. Many studies show that just looking at a personal wall on Facebook for 3 minutes can significantly boost self-confidence. [1] X Research Resources Worth a try!
- Spend time with dad. Research also shows that children who spend more time with their father during adolescence become more confident than children who spend less time with their father. [2] X Research Source Note: It’s probably best to hang out with your dad for hours before talking to someone you like. The goal is to get the best results.
- You will say, What? How can I do that? I can’t even control that . Maybe you have no control. But sometimes when we think about our loved one too much, and imagine life with them, that’s when we begin to develop an unhealthy relationship with that imaginary person. This imaginary relationship becomes so unhealthy that we cannot imagine life without them, all of which not even the person knows.
- If you don’t care about the results, confidence will increase. This is a charm to a lot of people. You don’t feel that being rejected by any girl or boy is a big deal, and so you can just shrug it off. Your confidence outweighs their rejection.
Act
- Approach the person during lunchtime at the cafeteria. Ask them to sit next to you and start a conversation. It’s all as simple as that.
- Talk to someone you like at the party. Whether it’s a birthday party or a pool party, if the two of you are invited, you should ask for permission to chat with them.
- Interact with them through one of the mutual friends. If you two have a mutual friend, meet that person to talk, and wait for him to give you an opening.
- Avoid using simple questions that require only “yes” or “no” answers. If you ask them “Did you go to class yesterday?”, they don’t have to give a long answer. If you ask “How was your teacher’s lecture yesterday?”, they will have a lot to say.
- Ask about their family and relatives. Where do they come from, what do their parents do, how do they know…and so on and so forth. In general, people like to talk about themselves, including the person they love.
- Eye contact. Making and maintaining eye contact shows that you’re interested in what the other person has to say.
- Point your body towards them. That means you care about what they have to say and don’t be shy.
- Smile. Your smile shows that person is making you happy.
- Flirting with body language. Especially when you’re a girl. Gently wink, stroke your hair or touch their shoulder.
- Laugh when they joke. Even if their jokes are not funny, you should laugh and try to please them.
- After giving it some thought and you might realize they like you too, don’t worry about asking them when we can see each other again.
- If nothing seems to distract them, and their discomfort with you continues to grow, apologize politely and leave quickly, consider trying another day.
- There’s nothing worse than feeling unrequited love, so if they just see you as a friend, just accept it and move on.
Advice
- If you make a mistake or say something thoughtless, pretend you’re joking by smiling or shrugging.
- Try to stay calm and confident, but don’t get cocky.
- All you have to do is be polite and not angry. Things can end better than you think.
- Don’t always follow the person you like. This action shows disrespect and shows your stress.
- Try to sit next to them if the two of you are in the same class.
- Do not fantasize about a love relationship with them. Sometimes you can sink into this imaginary relationship and get rejected easily. Instead of fantasizing about a relationship, think about talking to the person until you’re ready to strike up a conversation with them.
- Tease them in a decent way. If they tease you back, it means your action is effective. Usually this is the most fun way to start talking.
- Don’t be too hasty and do silly things. They may misunderstand you and think you’re not ready to date.
- Be sure to get to know your crush well before you ask them out.
- Don’t start by trying to talk to them privately! Join your group’s talk so they can get a little bit of information about you.
- Try to get to know their friends. They will feel comfortable in your presence if you know their friends.
Warning
- After several failed attempts, it’s time to let go of the person. Even if you think you can make them like you if you get a chance to talk more, that kind of forced relationship won’t end well.
- As long as you have practice and preparation, this will not be a problem. You already know what to do in any given situation.
wikiHow is a “wiki” site, which means that many of the articles here are written by multiple authors. To create this article, 167 people, some of whom are anonymous, have edited and improved the article over time.
This article has been viewed 58,413 times.
Do you like someone but are always shy when you have something to say to them? Perhaps you fear rejection or worry that what you say is stupid. It’s okay, cheer up! Your chances aren’t as bad as you think (especially if you and your crush are already friends). Remember, if you do nothing, the chances are zero. Keep that in mind and be ready to start a conversation with someone you love without letting yourself be rejected!
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