How to Compliment someone who doesn’t accept compliments

Knowing how to give tactful advice is an important communication skill that you need in your life. Besides, knowing how to receive compliments is equally important. However, some people refuse to accept the compliment. They will feel uncomfortable or withdraw or misunderstand the compliment. They behave this way for a reason, and digging deeper will help the person you care about learn to accept compliments.

Table of Contents

Praise effectively

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Turn compliments into your emotions. It will be hard for him to refute when you talk about your own feelings.

“I’ve never seen such blue eyes before.”
“The piano piece you just played makes me feel so light and peaceful.”
“Seeing your smile makes me so happy!”
“I could not have completed this project without you. You have helped me a lot and I really appreciate it.” ^{[1] X Research Source}

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Honest. Others will find that fake compliments and flattery not only make you distrustful, but also break the relationship. ^{[2] X Research Source}

Think about why you’re giving the compliment. Compliments should make the other person feel comfortable and valued, not for personal gain.

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Specifically. Sometimes, the most memorable compliment is the most specific because it shows you care.

“I liked the way you answered questions during today’s presentation. He helped the team find solutions that benefit everyone.” ^{[3] X Research Sources}
“The color of your shirt is very beautiful. It’s the same color as your eyes.”

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Praise skillfully. Be creative in how you give advice to make the other person feel at ease.

Ask for recipes if you like what she cooks or ask for directions. She will feel appreciated. ^{[4] X Research Sources}
Mention someone saying nice things about her or talking about how much other people care about her. ^{[5] X Research Sources}
Do charity work together so she knows she is someone who can help others. ^{[6] X Research Sources}

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Offer compliments when you want. If praising others is part of your personality, you don’t have to give it up just because you don’t get a good response from others. If giving praise is part of who you are, show it and don’t stop offering it.

Even if the person doesn’t accept your compliment, you’ve activated their striatum, encouraging them to perform better. ^{[7] X Research Sources}
Advice can also boost other people’s self-esteem. Even so, the person doesn’t have to consciously “accept” the compliment to be affected. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

Help someone receive a compliment

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Refrain from talking bad about others and talking about your flaws. Creating positive habits will help others realize how harsh we are to others and to ourselves. You can be a good role model for thinking positively about yourself and seeing your own worth, so when you give a compliment, others will believe it.

Avoid gossiping and saying negative things about yourself and others. ^{[9] X Sources of Research} When you put yourself down without other people or friends, it also has a negative effect.
This is extremely important for children and adolescents as they will learn it from the adults around them. ^{[10] X Research Source}

Find the cause of the problem

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Recognize people with low self-esteem . However, some people don’t really love themselves. This can happen in an environment of lack of interest or other factors and is very difficult to overcome.

People with low self-esteem may not like compliments because it contradicts their negative view of themselves and they can’t believe it. ^{[14] X Research Source}
The person will think the compliment means you have huge expectations that they can’t meet and they don’t want to let you down. ^{[15] X Research Source}

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Learn about cultural differences. Is the person from a different country or culture than you? Perhaps this is also part of the reason.

Some cultures don’t like compliments because they feel pampered and you’re treating them like a child. ^{[16] X Research Source}
In addition, accepting advice in some cultures is beyond that of others, which is difficult to accept. ^{[17] X Research Source}

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Consider gender differences. Women often find it difficult to accept compliments. They will do anything to prove you wrong or reduce the positive aspects about them.

Women often refuse compliments because they have been taught to be humble, unlike men. ^{[18] X Research Sources}
Women are also taught not to compare to make others feel bad so they will decline compliments so as not to hurt other people’s feelings. ^{[19] X Research Source}

Advice

You should accept or ignore if someone refuses to accept the compliment.

Warning

The other person’s refusal to accept the compliment has nothing to do with the person giving the compliment. If you are always tactful, remember that this is not your fault but the person’s.

Steps

Praise effectively

Help someone receive a compliment

Find the cause of the problem

Advice

Warning

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