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This article was co-written by Rahti Gorfien, PCC. Rahti Gorfien is a life coach and founder of Creative Calling Coaching. Rahti is a Certified Coach of the International Federation of Coaches, an ADHD coach certified by the Institute of ADHD Coaches, and a provider of career specials. She was named one of the 15 best life coaches in New York City by Expertise in 2018. She is an alumnus of the graduate acting program at New York University and has worked as a theater artist over the past 30 years.
This article has been viewed 6,574 times.
Research shows that how people react to other individuals and situations is influenced primarily by their perception, not by the individual or situation. [1] X Source of Research If you have a negative attitude, you are more likely to have a negative impact on everything around you. By taking positive steps to cultivate optimism, you can combat and change negative attitudes.
Steps
Forget Negativity
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Take responsibility for your thoughts and actions. You are the only one in control of your life and the negative situations and negative thoughts you harbor directly affect you. By taking responsibility for your actions, you can begin to remove the negatives from your life and build positivity. [2] X Research Source
- Negative thinking breeds negative actions. If you decide to have a positive attitude, you will foster positive changes. [3] X Research Sources
- For example, if you missed out on a promotion at work, it’s not because your boss doesn’t like you or your productivity is low. Instead of blaming, talk to your boss about how to improve at work and make positive changes.
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Make a list of the negative things in your life and start changing them. Acknowledging the negatives in your life will allow you to see what you can control and change. Making a list symbolizes letting go of the negatives. [4] X Research Sources
- Write down a list of anything in your life that you consider negative. Read the list and mark the things you can change. For example, you can change negative relationships with other people by removing them from your life, or you can change a bad financial situation by implementing ways to save money. [5] X Research Sources
- Once you have thought about how to change the negative influences in your life, burn the paper to symbolize letting go and write a new list with the positive things in your life.
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Give up expectations. Negativity often begins with expectations of oneself and others. Letting go of unrealistic and negative expectations will not only help you change your attitude, but will also create a positive environment.
- Accept that nothing is perfect. Imperfection defines character, and letting go of all expectations of perfection helps you focus on the positive in everyone and in every situation. [6] X Research Sources
- Whenever something bad happens, forget about it as much as possible and then quickly imagine the things that you want to happen. Likewise, if a person says something negative, consider it for a moment and then let it go. Paying attention to the negative will only make you feel negative.
Rahti Gorfien, PCC
Life Coach
Rahti Gorfien is a life coach and founder of Creative Calling Coaching. Rahti is a Certified Coach of the International Federation of Coaches, an ADHD coach certified by the Institute of ADHD Coaches, and a provider of career specials. She was named one of the 15 best life coaches in New York City by Expertise in 2018. She is an alumnus of the graduate acting program at New York University and has worked as a theater artist over the past 30 years.
Rahti Gorfien, PCC
Life Coach
Life Coach
Learn to accept when things don’t go as planned. Use mindfulness meditation techniques to allow the mind to let go of things that don’t go right. Don’t hold onto negative emotions, and don’t keep these experiences in your head. You will feel more pain if you always keep negative thoughts.
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Forgive yourself and others. Holding grudges and focusing on your shortcomings will only increase negative attitudes. Being able to forgive and let go will allow you to focus on the positive things about yourself and others. [7] X Research Sources
- The act of forgiveness removes a negative attitude and makes space for a positive one. But it also reduces stress and increases peace and serenity in your life. [8] X Research Sources
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Limit or eliminate all negative people from your life. The people around us have a significant influence on our attitudes. Limiting or removing negative people from your life will begin to help you change your attitude.
- If you can’t completely remove someone from your life, or you don’t want to hurt someone, you can limit your contact with them. You can also change their negative attitudes and attitudes by pointing out the positive side of things the person says or does. This way you won’t get caught up in their negative path. [9] X Research Source
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Respond to change. Negative emotions often accompany change, and the best way to handle change is to respond, not react. Make the decision to respond positively in any situation and you will be able to stay away from the negative. [10] X Research Source
- You cannot control every situation and person, but you can choose how you will respond to them. Meeting a negative situation or person with optimism will keep your positive attitude and can also lead to a positive resolution of things. [11] X Research Source
- For example, if someone sends you a vulgar letter, don’t respond immediately. Draft your response and wait for 24 hours before sending it. Review the letter the next day and you’ll be able to tone down your response, which can keep the situation from escalating.
- If something bad happens, like losing a job, for example, thank your boss for the opportunity and say “this is a change to find something better that I really love.”
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Always move forward. Sometimes you will have normal and acceptable negative thoughts, but learn to ignore them. By always focusing on the positive, you will be able to change your negative attitude. [12] X Research Source
Focus on the Positive
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See the positive side in everything. Negative thoughts and attitudes are eating away at you and if you let them control you, they will become stronger. Finding the positive in any person or situation will help change your mindset to be positive. [13] X Research Source
- Even in the worst case scenario, there is always something positive. It may take some time to realize, but being able to see the positive in everything will help you avoid the negativity.
- One study showed that a positive attitude contributes to success more than anything, including knowledge or skills. [14] X Research Source
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Make a list of everything that makes you feel grateful. Gratitude helps foster a positive attitude. Making a list of everything you are grateful for will help you combat any negative thoughts that may arise. [15] X Research Source
- In situations where you feel negative, read a list of things you are grateful for. This will remind you to stay optimistic.
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Use positive words. The language you choose has a significant effect on your external attitudes and emotions. Using positive words and phrases throughout the day will help you stay optimistic and combat negativity. [16] X Research Source
- Use phrases like “I’m full of hope” or “we’ll find a way out”. These things will help you and those around you stay optimistic. [17] X Research Source
- Giving yourself a positive affirmation every morning when you wake up will direct your day in a positive direction. For example, you could say “today is going to be a great day. I feel great and I’m ready to make a difference.”
- Write positive quotes and put them in negative situations. If you have something that reminds you of positive things, you will be more likely to have positive thoughts and feelings throughout the day. [18] X Research Sources
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Surround yourself with optimists. Having advocates around you who can perceive the real value of the issue is important for cultivating a positive attitude. Having positive people around will help you fight the negativity and help you change your attitude. [19] X Research Source
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Helping others. Simple acts of kindness and helping others can do wonders for your attitude. Not only can it help you see life as it should be, it can also prevent you from having problems and often make you feel more optimistic. [20] X Research Source
- Consider volunteering at a hospital or kitchen. You will realize that you are healthy and have the means to support yourself that will put your life in the right direction. Doing this can also help you choose a positive way to change the negative things in your life.
- Helping friends and family can also help you change a bad attitude because you’re making others happy, and this will help you feel happy, too.
- Giving and receiving love and support will make your perception of life more and more positive. [21] X Research Source
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This article was co-written by Rahti Gorfien, PCC. Rahti Gorfien is a life coach and founder of Creative Calling Coaching. Rahti is a Certified Coach of the International Federation of Coaches, an ADHD coach certified by the Institute of ADHD Coaches, and a provider of career specials. She was named one of the 15 best life coaches in New York City by Expertise in 2018. She is an alumnus of the graduate acting program at New York University and has worked as a theater artist over the past 30 years.
This article has been viewed 6,574 times.
Research shows that how people react to other individuals and situations is influenced primarily by their perception, not by the individual or situation. [1] X Source of Research If you have a negative attitude, you are more likely to have a negative impact on everything around you. By taking positive steps to cultivate optimism, you can combat and change negative attitudes.
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