How to Behave After Sex

Sex is the most intimate experience two people can share with each other, but not everyone knows how to behave after that hot time. The key to turning a night of sex into a great relationship is thinking about how your partner feels and respecting them. Let the salty aftertaste flow naturally and find ways to get closer to the person, for example, by cuddling, talking, or bathing together. By showing that you are serious, you will have the opportunity to strengthen the relationship and start a long and sweet love affair.

Table of Contents

Continue to connect with that person right after sex

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Let the aftertaste gradually fade away. Take a few minutes just to lie next to your partner and bask in the feeling of satisfaction. The passionate moment may be over, but the feeling of warmth and closeness is not. Often people will sit up and leave, or focus on other things as soon as sex is over. They don’t feel the brief moments of contentment after the frenzy is over. ^{[1] X Research Source}

Just as you use foreplay to increase excitement and anticipation before you jump in, take some time to slowly and gently land on the ground after the fun.
If you’re going to do the second half, you need to take a few minutes to rest and recharge.

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Hug that person. Instead of rolling over to the side of the bed to sleep, hug your partner tightly. Wrap your arms around them, and gently nuzzle their necks or run your hands through their hair. Maybe the two of you will have a good night’s sleep together in a few minutes, and that’s the happy end to a fun night. ^{[2] X Research Source}

If you’re still awake, you can watch TV, listen to music, or talk and laugh while lying next to each other.
Physical intimacy after sex is very important. Without it, your partner may misunderstand and assume that you have sex just for your own pleasure. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

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Enjoy the silence. There’s no rule that says you have to chat after sex. Forget about coming up with something good, instead, listen to the person’s breathing, feel their heartbeat, and experience as much as you can.

If you feel the need to say something, you will try to find a way to make it sound, but that can easily become awkward and distant.

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Let the conversation flow naturally. When continuing to talk, do it as naturally as possible. Relax, be yourself, and only speak when there’s something worth saying. Complimenting the person for their seduction skills or asking about simple things like how they are feeling will be a great starting point. ^{[4] X Research Sources}

Try not to ask as if you are forcing the person. You will make them awkward by asking things like “Do you like it when I do that?”
Don’t criticize, judge or give yourself advice after sex. This is a time to relax, not a lecture. ^{[5] X Research Sources}

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Shower together. When it’s time to get up and shower, go to the bathroom together instead of going in one by one. A hot shower may be just what you need to feel refreshed. You can also climb into the tub and enjoy a long relaxing soak together if there’s enough room. This not only saves water, but also an opportunity to have fun and be together comfortably. ^{[6] X Research Sources}

Taking a shower with someone for the first time can feel a bit awkward. Keep the atmosphere upbeat by splashing them lightly with water or offering to rub their back.

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Find your own space if you’re feeling down. Sometimes people feel distant as soon as an intimate moment ends, especially when the person is someone they don’t know well. This is completely normal. If you have mixed feelings or the idea of having to stay behind to hug a stranger makes you uncomfortable, ask permission to do something else like call a trusted friend or go for a walk. You can leave or tell the person to leave if you don’t feel better after a few minutes. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

You’re under no obligation to cuddle, flirt, or confide after orgy. Instead, you should do what makes you most comfortable.
While it’s important that the person feels relaxed and satisfied, how you feel about what just happened is also important. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

Avoid hurting feelings

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Try not to sleep. It’s perfectly normal to feel a little drowsy right after sex, but falling asleep right behind a hot bed can be misinterpreted as impolite. Try to stay awake and engaged with the other person. Sitting up or talking to your partner might be better if you’re really exhausted. ^{[9] X Research Source}

When you feel like you’re about to actually doze off, focus on taking deep breaths or going to the bathroom to wake up.
Make it a goal to sleep behind the person. Once they’re asleep, you can take it as a safe sign to fall asleep.

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Put down the phone. Make sure the person has your attention until the quiet moment has passed. Your partner won’t want to see you glued to your phone after this intimate time. Then you’ll have plenty of time to reply to messages or update your status on Facebook. ^{[10] X Research Source}

You should also turn off the ringer or turn off the phone before sex to avoid being disturbed.

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Dress calmly. Find your underwear if you feel embarrassed but leave your clothes on. If it’s cold, get under a blanket or pull the person a little closer instead of putting on your clothes right away. The two of you have shared bodies so there’s nothing to be embarrassed about right now.

There’s nothing wrong with changing into pajamas or warm clothes, but if you’re in a hurry, your partner will feel distant or embarrassed.

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Consider staying overnight. If you’re in no hurry the next morning, sleeping with your partner can be a good thing for both of you. Staying with them is a respectful and polite gesture, as it shows that you don’t want to leave them too quickly. The two of you can go your separate ways the next morning after spending a pleasant night together. ^{[11] X Research Source}

If you can’t stay, bring it up tactfully so that you don’t appear to be in a hurry to leave. Tell your partner that you have to go to work early in the morning, or that you have pets at home and have to go home to feed them and go for a walk.
When you’re at your partner’s house, don’t assume they want to keep you. Watch for signs that they’re trying to sleep alone, like when the person tells you how busy they’ve been all week, or becomes distant (physically or mentally) after sex. love. ^{[12] X Research Source}

Be kind to them the next morning

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Inquire by calling or texting. Contact the person the next day and let them know that you enjoyed what just happened. Many people make the mistake of deliberately ignoring contact with the other person for fear that it will give them a reputation of being clingy, but that only makes the other person more suspicious. A quick exchange will show them that you have them in mind. ^{[13] X Research Source}

A phone call is the most considerate way to ask since it takes more effort than texting, but texting is also better than nothing if you’re busy.
Don’t wait too long to get in touch. Remember that you are communicating with a human with their own feelings, expectations and anxieties, this is not a game.

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Maintain a friendly and warm demeanor when in public. Say hello to them when you meet them at school or work, or when you accidentally run into them on the street. Smile, make eye contact, and give them a few minutes. The golden rule here is to treat them the way you would a friend, unless the two of you have agreed to keep the other a secret.

You shouldn’t feel that you have to act like you don’t know in order to keep things cool or keep people from finding out. The person will think you are avoiding them.
Similarly, you shouldn’t do anything to draw attention to the fact that the two of you slept together. Confidentiality is an important condition for maintaining healthy and mature sexual relationships.

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Try to spend time together outside of the bedroom. If you have a few hours to spare, see if your partner wants to go out to dinner or watch a movie with you. You should at least ask them out for a walk or coffee. They’ll be happy to know that you love them enough to meet again so quickly. ^{[14] X Research Source}

The key point here is that the two of you must meet each other in good clothes to maintain and strengthen the original bond. If you’re not willing to engage in non-sexual activities with them, you’ll appear superficial and your partner will feel taken advantage of.

Advice

There aren’t any manuals on how to behave after sex. Many websites, movies, and other self-proclaimed “experts” will tell you what you should say or do to paint a certain image, but the best you can do is live true to yourself.
Discuss your wishes with the person you plan to have sex with to avoid awkward or humiliating situations later.
Make sure the two of you are honest about your reproductive health first so it doesn’t become a point of conflict.

Warning

Do not use sex to bargain. Demanding, demanding special treatment, or accusing the other person of doing what you want will only lower the value of sex and possibly lead to a breakdown in the relationship.
Don’t smoke after a hot moment, unless you both do. This habit is considered by many to be discouraging.
Keep your time together a secret. Bragging about such feats can destroy the person’s beliefs or cause others to misunderstand him or her.

Steps

Continue to connect with that person right after sex

Avoid hurting feelings

Be kind to them the next morning

Advice

Warning

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