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This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 21 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 22,129 times.
Relax. Do you want to face life’s ups and downs with strength and grace? Becoming mentally and emotionally strong is not a day or two. If you see life’s unexpected misfortunes as an opportunity to become stronger, you will gradually accumulate wisdom and insight, which you can test under really difficult circumstances.
Steps
Define Challenges and Set Goals
- Being emotionally strong doesn’t mean you don’t have to go through pain or anguish — resilience is often the result of a person facing extremely difficult situations. It means that you will learn to rebuild things on your own or “bounce back” from these experiences. [3] X Trusted Sources American Psychpogical Association Go to Source
- To strengthen your resilience, you’ll want to focus on specific skills, such as: planning and executing them, developing confidence and a positive outlook on yourself, learning how control intense emotions and urges, and communicate and solve problems effectively. [4] X Trusted Source American Psychpogical Association Go to Source
- For example, you may have difficulty speaking up about your needs. If you want to work around this, you’ll see your goal as becoming more assertive. [7] X Research Sources
- Try to determine if negative childhood experiences are affecting your mental and emotional state. Consider why these experiences affected you and how they did.
- You can talk to your therapist about your childhood experiences to understand, face, and overcome them.
- “I feel exhausted when…”
- “The biggest challenge for me is…”
- “If I could talk to my childhood self, I would say…”
- “When I feel sad, the best thing I can do for myself or say to myself is…”
- Remember that feelings of mental as well as emotional weakness can be indicative of a psychological problem that needs treatment. Talking with a therapist can help you understand what’s going on and make decisions about the best course of action.
Keep Yourself Stable
- Exercise regularly. Set a goal to exercise 30 minutes a day.
- Eat a balanced diet with healthy and unprocessed foods like fruits, vegetables, nuts, and fat-free protein.
- Get eight hours of sleep every night.
- Spend at least 15 minutes a day doing yoga, deep breathing, or meditation.
- Drink plenty of water, at least eight glasses a day and more if you exercise and sweat.
- Read books, watch great movies, plays, ballet shows, and enjoy art in its many forms.
- Create your own art. Write, draw, compose music, carve, knit – anything that stimulates your creative side.
- Learn new skills. Try being a chef, do some homemade projects at home, garden, learn how to drive a manual transmission, learn how to fish, train to run 5 kilometers.
- Chat with people. There are deep conversations that go beyond petty chatter. Get to know people’s biographies and share your stories.
- Consider going to a place of worship to pray with others.
- Start practicing meditation or yoga.
- Spend time enjoying nature and admiring the beauty of the natural world.
Creating Mental and Emotional Strength
- If you have goals that are too big and seem unattainable, break them down into smaller achievable steps. [14] X Research Source Suppose, if you’re trying to become more assertive, you could make it a goal to speak up for yourself three times a week. These expressions can be as small as telling your lover that you want to have dinner at a particular restaurant instead of going along with that person’s wishes.
- Maintain a “persistent” attitude. Resolute that even if there are obstacles, you will keep trying, even if the immediate goal is to continue working, complete a project, manage personal finances, etc.
- See failure as an opportunity to learn. Failures are merely temporary obstacles with many lessons for each of us.
- Curb negative thoughts by identifying and challenging them. Learn more by Facing Negative Thoughts.
- While you may be able to keep your exposure to negative or toxic people to a minimum—or even eliminate them entirely—sometimes these people are family members, co-workers, or people you are forced to interact with. Instead of aggravating their negativity, you can learn to ignore them and set limits on these people. The following wikiHow article, Facing Negative People, is a great resource for how to take action.
- “I’m trying to be emotionally strong every day.”
- “I’m learning effective ways to manage stress and be kinder to myself.”
- “I know that if I work little by little every day to achieve this goal, I’ll feel stronger mentally and emotionally.”
- Taking the time to count from 1 to 10 may seem cliché, but it’s actually beneficial. Before reacting emotionally to something, stop, take a deep breath, and think hard. [17] X Research Source
- Meditation can help you stay calm, because it teaches you to be more objective with your feelings and thoughts. Instead of reacting, you can see your thoughts and feelings to realize, “Yes, I’m really feeling down,” and think about what to do next. [18] X Trusted Source Harvard Medical Schop Go to Source
- Instead of stress, create healthy habits by thinking about the things that bother you, staying calm, and deciding on the best, healthiest, and most effective way to deal with them.
- For example, if your husband frequently forgets to close his toothpaste tube, remember that it may not be as important to him as it is to you. You can choose to deal with the situation – close the tube of toothpaste yourself and think about what your husband has done for the family, or stick a (cute) note on the wall as a gentle reminder.
- Be mindful of perfectionism, it can lead you to set unrealistically high and high expectations for yourself and your everyday life, forgetting that there are influencing factors that are not part of your life. your control.
- Try a visualization exercise to shake off all the minutiae that are bothering you. Hold a small stone in your hand and imagine it includes everything that is bothering you. Focus on that negativity and squeeze the stone. Then, when you’re ready, throw the stone away. Throw it in the lake or throw it far into the field. As you do so, imagine you are also throwing away all your negative emotions with the stone. [21] X Research Source
- Read more. Reading news or novels will open the door for you to enter other people’s world, which will remind you that the world is huge and your problems are like drops in the ocean.
- Participate in volunteer activities. Communicate with people who need your help. Several studies show that volunteering has many benefits for your mental and physical health. [22] X Research Source
- Listen to a friend. Listen to someone who needs your advice. Put yourself in that person’s shoes, give the best and sincere advice.
- Tourism. Stepping out of your comfort zone will give you the right perspective on your situation. Go somewhere new, even if it’s just a few towns away.
- Live the happy moments. Try to enjoy moments with family, friends, pets, etc., as much as possible.
- Look at the positive side of difficult situations. You can always learn something from them.
- If you have a tendency to run away from, for example, watching television to get away from your problems, recognize these bad habits and try to get rid of them.
- Be honest with yourself about your weaknesses.
Solving Life Situations
- If possible, take the time to consider the situation and write down your feelings. [26] X Research Source Try to identify one positive thing about the situation, even if it’s just a very small thing. [27] X Research Sources Such a small change in the way you think can make a big difference.
- Remember to take at least 10 seconds to think before you speak. Even if your partner says she wants to break up, you can still take 10 seconds to think before responding. In the end, you will feel satisfied with your actions.
- Suppose a friend tempts you to commit a crime, and you’re not sure what to choose between loyalty to your friends and compliance with the law. Weigh the good and the bad in both options. Is that person really your friend when he wants you to break the law? Or is the law obstructing real justice?
- Consult people you trust. It’s perfectly normal to ask other people’s opinions when you’re not sure about the path you’re taking. However, don’t let them turn you around and make you do the wrong thing.
- Imagine what someone you admire would do. The person must be calm, honest, and kind. What will that person do?
- After all, you are still responsible for your actions. Make the best decision you can — one you can live with.
- It’s okay if things don’t end up as you planned. Remind yourself that things don’t always go smoothly, and that you don’t always get exactly what you want; This is true for everyone, no matter how wonderful their lives seem. [31] X Research Source
Advice
- Stay away from people who disrespect you and make you feel weak.
- Try meditation to stay focused and calm.
- Try to live every moment in the present, not thinking too much about the things that bothered you in the past and the things in the future that worry you.
This article was co-written by Trudi Griffin, LPC, MS. Trudi Griffin is a licensed professional counselor in Wisconsin. She received her MS in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from Marquette University in 2011.
There are 21 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 22,129 times.
Relax. Do you want to face life’s ups and downs with strength and grace? Becoming mentally and emotionally strong is not a day or two. If you see life’s unexpected misfortunes as an opportunity to become stronger, you will gradually accumulate wisdom and insight, which you can test under really difficult circumstances.
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