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How to Become Less Selfish

February 15, 2024 by admin Category: How To

You are viewing the article How to Become Less Selfish  at Tnhelearning.edu.vn you can quickly access the necessary information in the table of contents of the article below.

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This article was co-written by Arda Ozdemir, MA. Arda Ozdemir is an executive coach and founder of Rise 2 Realize, a Palo Alto, California nonprofit that provides a hands-on road map towards developing one’s full potential. in life and career. Arda is an expert in the application of Reiki, the art of emotional release, and a HeartMath coach and mentor.

There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 21,838 times.

Have you heard more than one person say that you are selfish? If you tend to think that you are the center of the universe, always insisting on getting your own way, and hate sharing or helping others, then chances are you have some kind of selfishness problem. . While becoming less selfish won’t happen overnight, there are always a few things you can do to become a giver, not just a taker.

Table of Contents

  • Steps
    • Strengthen Self-Knowledge
    • Become a Better Friend
    • Show Gratitude
  • Advice
  • Warning

Steps

Strengthen Self-Knowledge

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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 1

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Join a group. Almost any group can. Join a sports league, or your neighborhood reception, or sign up for an after-school French club. Whatever activity you choose, being part of a team will help you realize that it’s important to work with others, and that everyone’s needs must be balanced for success. group work; Not being selfish is part of choosing to be part of a group, so joining a group is a great decision to practice generosity and fairness. Effective teamwork is an extremely important skill for many professions. [1] X Research Source

  • Being part of a group will make it difficult for you to put your own needs above the needs of others because on the surface you will be criticized for being selfish, which negatively affects the group as a whole. .
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 2

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Practice empathy. Empathy means understanding or sharing another’s feelings, or “putting yourself in the other person’s shoes”. Empathy is a skill that can be practiced and enhanced, and helps you become less selfish. Continue to seek other people’s points of view and put off your own needs and desires; In doing so, you will often become more generous and understanding. [2] X Research Resources Some ways to practice empathy include: [3] X Research Resources

  • Ask about the situation of others. Instead of making assumptions or not paying attention to someone whose actions cause you to disagree, ask them what’s going on in life. Be curious and interested in the person and check to see if you can understand their point of view on what’s going on.
  • Visualize reasons to sympathize with a person’s behavior. If you are in line behind an elderly woman and she is rather slow to pay the bill, release criticism and anger. It is possible that she spends most of the day alone, and she is chatting with the staff a little longer because she rarely sees anyone else. It doesn’t matter if this is the real reason she’s holding the line; The important thing is that this helps you empathize with others.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 3

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Balance your needs with the needs of others. If you have a tendency to put yourself first, no matter what to get what you want, when you want it, then you need to start letting go of your own way and think about finding a balance. for relationships. Start thinking about what your child, friend, or lover wants, even if this conflicts with your needs. Whenever you are in a conflict situation, think about what makes the other person happy instead of what will make yourself happy. Try to find a compromise solution, or try putting your needs aside.

  • Remember that everyone’s needs, hopes, and desires are equally important.
  • If your crush really wants to watch their favorite team play basketball in a rematch (after a draw) but you want to go to the movies, then go for it this time.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 5

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Show appreciation for the kindness others have shown you. If you find yourself taking advantage or expecting a lot from others, such as a friend who always picks you up, or someone who used their personal relationship to get you a job , then it’s time to say “Thank you”. When someone is helpful or kind to you, show your gratitude by thanking them, with words, or even a note or a small gift. Let them know you really appreciate them helping you.

  • Try doing a good deed helping a friend or even a stranger, but don’t expect anything in return. A purely unselfish act of kindness done when a reward or praise is not expected. [4] X Research Sources
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 6

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Learn to compromise. Think about the possibility of finding a great solution to a situation where everyone involved is happy to get some of what they wanted. Compromise is a skill that will help you succeed in friendships and romantic relationships, as well as in the business world. [5] X Research Sources

  • When you’re trying to solve a problem, think about who wants more. If you and your girlfriend are choosing a movie to watch, and she has long wanted to see a certain movie, while you are indifferent to another choice, then you should do it. .
  • If you realize you don’t feel too sure about your position, then come to an agreement that pleases the other person. So next time you really want something, then it will be your turn. Things go bad when you choose to go your own way and argue.
  • Before you come to a compromise, make sure everyone has time to express their views. This can help you get a more stable, balanced perspective before making a decision.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 20

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Share. Let your friend borrow your favorite dress. Share lunch with a friend who forgot to bring rice. Let your boyfriend use your stereo all afternoon.

  • Get in the habit of sharing something that you once wanted so badly to possess. This will help you show others how important they are to you and will make it easier for you to give. This will change your self-concept from a selfish person to a generous, unselfish person.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 21

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Do volunteering. Spend time volunteering in the community, whether it’s at school, at work, or freelancing. You could work in the school library, clean up the local park, serve in the kitchen, or spend time teaching adults and children how to read. Volunteering is a way to broaden your view of the world by understanding how others are in need and how you can make a difference. Volunteering will also make you more appreciative of what you have when you realize that not everyone is lucky enough to have everything you have.

  • Make it a goal to volunteer at least once a week, and realize how much less selfish you feel.

Become a Better Friend

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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 7

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Be a better listener. If you want to let go of selfishness, then you need to learn to listen to others. And this means that you really want to listen, not just nod and say “yes” until it’s your turn to talk. Listening means understanding what people say, remembering what they say, and understanding the problems of friends, problems with lovers, and co-workers. It can also be helpful to ask open-ended questions that give the other person a chance to express themselves. [6] X Research Source

  • Do not interrupt others.
  • After your friend has spoken, give a meaningful response by mentioning some of the points that were raised in the conversation to show that you were really listening.
  • If your friends are having problems, don’t rush to compare their problems with your own, which you consider “the worse way”. Look at all issues in their own right and give appropriate advice where possible and don’t consider them all relevant to you. You could say, “I was in a similar situation, and that’s what helped me. Do you think this will work for you too?”
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 8

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Let your friends choose what the two of you will do together. This small and simple act can make a huge difference to a friendship. The key to being a good friend is being willing to help, including sometimes supporting some of your friends’ actions. [7] X Research Sources Next time you have a date with a friend, let her choose which movie to watch, where to have dinner, bar prime time, or what activity the two of you will do together. .

  • Once you get into the habit of doing this, you may find that it makes you happy to make someone you care about happy.
  • You can also take turns. Friends can choose what to do this week and then the next week you decide.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 9

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Prepare meals at home for friends. Go to the store, buy food that you know someone you will like, then spend at least an hour cooking a delicious meal and setting it up on the table. Preparing meals for friends takes time, money, and effort, but you will feel happy and comfortable when you are kind to others. [8] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source This is truly a great gesture especially when a friend is feeling tired, exhausted, or in need of comfort.

  • Tell your friend not to bring anything but drinks. You will be the one doing everything that night.
  • If you find that you really enjoy cooking for others, you could even start baking cookies or cooking casseroles and bring them to your friend’s house for the evening.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 10

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Give useful advice. Closing things off by giving meaningful, honest, and helpful advice to your friends can really help you feel more giving and less selfish. Not all things are too materialistic; Sometimes the best thing you can do for a friend is to help them figure out the crux of the matter. Don’t just tell your friends what they want to hear; instead, take the time to give them meaningful and practical advice that will help them truly change their lives.

  • Giving helpful advice to a friend can also help you become more aware of what they really need instead of what you need.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 11

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Stop talking about yourself all the time. This is easier said than done. Although selfishness and self-centeredness are not exactly the same, the two qualities always appear together. Therefore, only one-third of the time spent with friends should be spent talking about yourself; Spend the rest of the time talking about the other person, about the acquaintances, or about some side topic.

  • If your friends are talking about a certain problem and you have experienced the same problem, it is also good to briefly share about yourself to say you have been through a similar thing as long as the purpose of the sharing is to let the other person understand that you are willing to empathize with them. After mentioning this, quickly shift the focus back to them so they can continue the conversation.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 12

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Ask your friends about the situation. If you don’t check in with them on a regular basis, then you really should make it a habit. Next time you’re with friends, ask them what they’re doing, how they’re feeling, how they’ve had their day, or what they’ve been looking forward to that week. [9] X Research Source Don’t make it too obvious that you’re changing trajectory and starting to bombard your friends with questions at once; instead, you should delicately seek to ask them some questions about themselves and what they are doing.

  • Showing concern for others is a great way to become less selfish.
  • Don’t make everything feel superficial. You should check on your partner because they are your friends and because you care about them.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 13

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Help a friend for a simple reason. Don’t help a friend as if it were a deliberate ploy to get something you wanted later; Please help sincerely. Help can be big or small, anything from buying coffee for friends while they’re busy taking a technical course to spending 3 hours in the evening explaining chemical equations to them. . If you realize that your friend really needs help but are afraid to say it, then you should be the one to ask for help before the other person even asks for help. [10] X Research Source

  • And sometimes, you can help a friend even when they really don’t need anything, simply because you’re feeling good or have seen something that reminds you of them.

Show Gratitude

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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 14

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Create a gratitude list once a week. You should take 15 minutes, once a month, to write down everything that you are grateful for in a notebook. Don’t stop until you can write down at least ten things. Keep the list, and add more things to the list each month. Use this list to remind yourself that your life is full, and think about how much you feel grateful for the people in your life. Then get out of the house and tell them!
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 15

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Give a small gift. Certainly giving a gift to a friend, family member, or lover on their birthday is an act of kindness. But it’s kinder and more natural to give gifts to friends because you feel grateful to know them. Doing so will help both of you be happier, happier. [11] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source

  • The gift doesn’t have to be brand new or luxurious. It could be a souvenir, a used book, or a piece of jewelry. It is important that you show your friends that you are grateful for them; The value of the gift doesn’t matter much.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 16

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Give away something you love. This is another great way to express gratitude. It’s one thing to give away an old shirt you don’t care about, but another to give your favorite long-sleeve sweater to your sister or best friend. If you have something you love but don’t really use, give it to someone who might really need it, even if the item means a lot to you. . This form of giving can spread good effects; Think about how the good deed you do can spread the impact on the recipient more directly than expected! [12] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source

  • Getting into the habit of giving away things you love can help you become less selfish, and less attached to everything you own.
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Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 17

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Nature appreciation. Go for a hike or jog in the park. You can also take a walk at the beach. Go to nature, immerse yourself in natural beauty, and focus on the value of the present moment. Appreciating the beauty of nature makes you more grateful for what you have and more willing to give and help others. [13] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source

  • Being in nature can also help you put things into perspective. You’ll have a more rigorous time to see your own little perspective on life as everything that matters to you standing at the foot of a mighty waterfall.
  • Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 19

    Image titled Be Less Selfish Step 19

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    Write a thank you card. Whenever someone else does something meaningful for you, take the time to write a thank you card. Make sure you mention exactly how much what the other person has done means a lot to you. Don’t simply send a card to a teacher, colleague, or professor; but get in the habit of writing cards for your close and loved ones, letting them know that you appreciate their efforts and are grateful for them.

    • Bought a set of 10 thank you cards. Make a goal to use up all those cards for the year.
  • Advice

    • Be happy that you have the ability to help those less fortunate than yourself. Think of them and be grateful for everything you have.
    • Imagine what it would be like when you were starving and didn’t know what to eat tomorrow. Go on the journey without food or drink except water for at least 3 days, then go to the local food storage and donate the box to charity. And then looking at your most expensive piece of clothing, is it really more valuable than food or a hope of escape from despair and hunger?

    Warning

    • Be careful not to go too far in the other direction or you will be taken advantage of by others. You should be strong and self-protective, but also be flexible and willing to share your time, resources, and love with certain people you consider good and trustworthy.
    X

    This article was co-written by Arda Ozdemir, MA. Arda Ozdemir is an executive coach and founder of Rise 2 Realize, a Palo Alto, California nonprofit that provides a hands-on road map towards developing one’s full potential. in life and career. Arda is an expert in the application of Reiki, the art of emotional release, and a HeartMath coach and mentor.

    There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.

    This article has been viewed 21,838 times.

    Have you heard more than one person say that you are selfish? If you tend to think that you are the center of the universe, always insisting on getting your own way, and hate sharing or helping others, then chances are you have some kind of selfishness problem. . While becoming less selfish won’t happen overnight, there are always a few things you can do to become a giver, not just a taker.

    Thank you for reading this post How to Become Less Selfish at Tnhelearning.edu.vn You can comment, see more related articles below and hope to help you with interesting information.

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