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Finding out about your sexual orientation can be difficult, confusing, or exciting – and it can be a combination of all three. Feeling attracted to women doesn’t change the core of who you are, but it does say a lot about your gender perception, and it’s normal to explore it, even though it may feel intimidating at first. scared. The journey to sexual orientation requires a lot of support from friends and family, or discovering yourself before connecting with others. Either way, kindness, selflessness, and curiosity will help you accept yourself as you are.
Steps
Awareness and recognition of your sexual orientation
- Remember that there is no “right” way to live as a lesbian, straight, bisexual, or all other sexual identity. Gender perception is determined by who you are, not by stereotypes or social expectations.
- Try to regulate this process in your head. Exploring sexual orientation is a good thing, and can be emotionally stimulating.
- Try not to judge yourself. Take a step back and really look into your feelings, and be kind and open to any emotions that arise.
- For example, if you feel shame or guilt, think about where their roots come from, be it a belief in love between a man and a woman in the family or the media.
- Little by little, start questioning the reasons behind your negative feelings. You may find that, for example, just because we are taught that something is normal or right, doesn’t mean they have control over who we are.
- If you feel conflicted, confused, or scared, lean on the things that make you happy. Remind yourself of who you are and what you hold dear, and remember that being a lesbian doesn’t change that.
- The therapist will be required to report abuse or things that could harm you or others, like suicidal thoughts.
Seeking support
- Search online and offline for legitimate groups, affiliated with organizations and therapists. If you’re not comfortable enough to speak up, just join the conversation and listen. When it’s your turn to share your story, take the opportunity.
- Pay attention to friends and family members who seem open and accepting. They may mention having LGBT friends or talk about their sexual orientation.
- Talk to them when you’re alone, something like, “I’m not ready to tell anyone about this, but I think I’m gay.”
- Try watching shows with iconic lesbian characters, like Glee and Orange is the New Black, or movies like Imagine Me and You, and Carp. Books include Nancy Garden’s Annie On My Mind, or Maureen Johnson’s Bermudez Triangle.
- Start by talking to people you know who will support you. This helps you create a support system when you want to be open to others.
- If you’re not sure how someone would respond, try mentioning a few lesbian movies or shows, or talking about LGBT issues, like the US Supreme Court’s approval of same-sex marriage. . Watch to see if they respect or disapprove of the above.
- Explain how you feel by saying, “I thought about this a long time ago, and realized I like other girls.”
- Let them ask questions afterwards.
- Seems to hate homosexuals. They may say negative things about the LGBT community or related issues on the news, or call gay people with disparaging words.
- People who threaten to harm you if they know you are gay.
- People who support you financially and physically. For example, if you are still living with your parents and are afraid that they will react badly, don’t open up to them until you can move out.
- People who can influence you with negative reactions. Think about how you would feel if someone reacted negatively. If you don’t think you can handle your feelings, then don’t come out with that person.
Explore relationships
- Don’t feel pressured by other people’s experiences or relationships. Only you know when you’re ready to date.
- Talking to friends and family can be awkward, but they know you better than anyone! They will know who is right for you or not, even better than any dating app or website.
- Try dating apps and sites like Lesly, Plenty of Fish, and Fem. [9] X Research Source
- Feel if you feel a flash of something special, or just simply enjoy being with her. When you’re ready, ask her if she wants to go out to dinner, see a movie, or do something fun together.
- You might say, “I don’t know if you’ve gone public with your friends and family. I’ve made it public and if you haven’t, that’s okay.”
- If you do decide to get close, talk openly about how you like it and ask the person what she likes as well.
- Remember to use safe sex methods, like female condoms or diaphragms.
- You don’t have to change who you are or what you do after you identify yourself as a lesbian. Be yourself, dating or not.
Advice
- Be kind to yourself. You deserve to be loved and happy, whatever your sexual orientation.
This article is co-authored by a team of editors and trained researchers who confirm the accuracy and completeness of the article.
The wikiHow Content Management team carefully monitors the work of editors to ensure that every article is up to a high standard of quality.
This article has been viewed 2,083 times.
Finding out about your sexual orientation can be difficult, confusing, or exciting – and it can be a combination of all three. Feeling attracted to women doesn’t change the core of who you are, but it does say a lot about your gender perception, and it’s normal to explore it, even though it may feel intimidating at first. scared. The journey to sexual orientation requires a lot of support from friends and family, or discovering yourself before connecting with others. Either way, kindness, selflessness, and curiosity will help you accept yourself as you are.
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