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This article was co-written by Ira Israel. Ira Israel is a private licensed counselor and psychotherapist with over 14 years of experience. He specializes in sharing with students about happiness and honesty. Ira organizes workshops on Happiness and Truth at the Esalen Institute and the Kripalu Center. In addition, he has written more than 400 articles on psychology, philosophy, Buddhism, yoga, film, art, music and literature for The Huffington Post, Good Men Project, Mind Body Green, Thrive Global and Medium. Ira is also the author of How to Survive Your Childhood Now That You’re an Adult: A Path to Authenticity and Awakening. get up). He holds a master’s degree in Psychology, Philosophy, and Religious Studies from the University of Pennsylvania.
This article has been viewed 6,398 times.
Accepting yourself, your life, and the reality of where you live can be difficult. Maybe you don’t like the future outlook or don’t like a part of your personality or sometimes you just don’t like the way you look. Self-criticism is common among us, but you can learn many ways to accept yourself and your life.
Steps
Nurturing the Will to Accept
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Acknowledge your strengths. When you look in the mirror and point out your shortcomings, it’s very easy. However, instead of counting the things you want to have, count the things that make you you. Make a list of your strengths, like your strengths, your values, and the people you have. [1] X Research Source
- If you’re having trouble summarizing your strengths, ask a friend or loved one what your positives are.
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Be honest with yourself. This is the hardest thing for us but a necessary step to turn our lives around [2] X Research Source . Today’s society focuses on individuals, we are encouraged to strive for success, and we often see praise as a way of recognizing success. We see criticism as negative, so we often avoid it so we don’t have to face it.
- To be true to yourself, try seeing yourself through the eyes of a stranger. Ask yourself what strangers would think of you and be objective, rather than just making your own judgments about yourself.
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Admit mistakes. Remember that you can’t fix it without admitting it. You can see mistakes as learning opportunities, as ways to get you where you want to be in life. [3] X Research Source Believe in yourself, believe that only you can change your life and control your destiny. Determine what is important to you and put your mind to it. Smash your doubts and trust that you can make what you want come true.
- When you recognize mistakes as learning opportunities and changing realities, you’ll be more determined to face challenges, persevere, and grow in meaningful ways. [4] X Research Sources
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Talk to someone you trust. Share how you feel about life with friends or relatives who always care and take care of you when needed. By sharing your thoughts with others, you will realize that your worries are exaggerated or that your life is not as bad as you think it is. [5] X Research Sources
- If you don’t just want to vent, try asking a friend or loved one for advice on how to change or improve your life in a way you don’t want to accept.
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Seek expert advice. Sometimes it’s easier and more effective to get professional help. A therapist can help you accept yourself and reality. That person can be a psychologist, psychiatrist, counselor, or mental health professional.
- You can find a psychologist at the nearest hospital.
Practicing Concentration of Will
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Learn the benefits of concentration. Focusing our will on reality and feelings is said to be very effective in helping us to accept ourselves more. [6] X Research Resources Some exercises to help you focus include self-love with the help of a professional, but you can also do them yourself at home. Some of the benefits of focusing on self-love include [7] X Research Source :
- Learn to criticize yourself less.
- Learn to deal with ambiguous emotions.
- Learn to motivate yourself with encouragement instead of blaming yourself.
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Schedule time and timer. Take 10-20 minutes of quiet time to meditate in the morning or evening. When you set a timer, you can focus and forget about time because you don’t have to worry about being late for work or anything else.
- You should choose a quiet and gentle timer alarm to stop the focusing process.
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Sit up straight in the chair. Find a chair that is comfortable and secure. Hold your posture and close your eyes to reduce distractions.
- Also, choose to sit in the quietest part of the house to avoid distractions.
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Pay attention to the breath. Focus on how you breathe naturally, don’t change unless you want to feel comfortable. Feel the entire breath being inhaled through the nose or mouth, descending to the lungs and invigorating the whole body.
- Feel the breath being inhaled, exhaled and release all physical and mental stress.
- Try to maintain this but you can let your body relax for a few minutes.
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Count your breaths. Count the number of inhalations and exhalations to 4 and then start again. You will think only of your breath and your body.
- If you find yourself thinking about something, accept it, but don’t judge yourself. Just gently bring the mind to focus on the breath.
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Be determined. Practice mindfulness meditation every day and gradually you will find yourself becoming more alert and accepting of yourself and the world around you when you no longer care to judge everything.
- It will take a lot of practice to get there, so don’t give up! Remember that this takes time.
Advice
- There are many factors beyond your control. However, don’t try to control everything. Just turn your thoughts into action and do your best for it.
- Don’t blame others for your choices.
- Find pictures of you as a child. Think about how far you’ve come since then. See how you have grown and think about the goals you have achieved. You are a great person so don’t think you are nothing because everyone has a purpose in life.
- When your mood is down, engage in activities that help you release your sadness. It could be drawing, exercise/yoga, music or anything else you want to relax.
Warning
- If you feel that life has become too oppressive, seek the help of a psychologist.
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This article was co-written by Ira Israel. Ira Israel is a private licensed counselor and psychotherapist with over 14 years of experience. He specializes in sharing with students about happiness and honesty. Ira organizes workshops on Happiness and Truth at the Esalen Institute and the Kripalu Center. In addition, he has written more than 400 articles on psychology, philosophy, Buddhism, yoga, film, art, music and literature for The Huffington Post, Good Men Project, Mind Body Green, Thrive Global and Medium. Ira is also the author of How to Survive Your Childhood Now That You’re an Adult: A Path to Authenticity and Awakening. get up). He holds a master’s degree in Psychology, Philosophy, and Religious Studies from the University of Pennsylvania.
This article has been viewed 6,398 times.
Accepting yourself, your life, and the reality of where you live can be difficult. Maybe you don’t like the future outlook or don’t like a part of your personality or sometimes you just don’t like the way you look. Self-criticism is common among us, but you can learn many ways to accept yourself and your life.
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