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This article was co-written by Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC. Moshe Ratson is the CEO of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a training and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is a certified career coach by the International Federation of Coaches. He received a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy from the University of Iona. Moshe is a member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT) and a member of the International Federation of Coaches (ICF).
There are 11 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 26,838 times.
People often say “Words fly”, but it doesn’t seem to be true. When someone calls you by a name that mocks or demeans you, your emotions will be greatly affected. Therefore, learn to let go of harsh words by reducing their power, increasing your self-esteem and healing your emotions.
Steps
Facing difficult words
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Never mind. What other people say is their business, not yours. Sometimes, when someone is hurt, they will “get angry at the fish” and say harsh words to you. People will sometimes act like that. This is often done mindlessly and the person will regret his words. [1] X Research Source
- If someone says something harsh to you, try to think that perhaps they are being hurt. Please sympathize with them instead of taking it for granted.
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Acknowledge the person who hurt you. If the person says something that hurts you, respond gently by seeing who they are, not their words. Whether the person intentionally or unintentionally says harsh words, this response will calm them down, and they may stop and realize their words hurt you.
- For example, you might say, “Wow, I’m really shocked to hear someone as nice as you say such harsh words.”
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Set deadlines for gnawing on the pain. Instead of repeating the harsh words of others, set a limit to bear the pain for yourself. That is, you are only sad for a set period of time and then forget everything. [2] X Research Source
- For example, you often spend a few hours or days getting upset by someone else’s bad comment. Now, take 10 minutes to think about how you felt when you heard that comment and acknowledge how hurtful it was. When the time is up, let go of those thoughts and never bring them up again.
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Write difficult words on paper, then destroy. If you’re someone who wants things to be clear, you can lessen the impact of harsh words by breaking them down. Write those words on paper. You will then shred the paper, burn it, or use a pencil or pen to cross out what you have written. [3] X Research Sources
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Replace with a positive comment. Use positive words to erase the effects of negative words. This works because you push the negative thoughts in your head with positive and inspiring words. [4] X Research Sources
- For example, if someone criticizes your appearance, you can replace that by saying to yourself, “I’m unique so I’m always special and unique.”
Boost your confidence
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Stronger through harsh words. What lesson did this situation teach you? Evaluate that statement and see if you can draw something for yourself. Ask yourself why it hurt and how you should handle it. [5] X Research Sources
- For example, if you hear someone say, “You are so weak,” you will feel sad or angry. However, if you actively learn to protect yourself or boost your morale, you will no longer feel the pain of hearing those words.
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Use your experience and perspective to help others. Harsh words often stem from hurt or insecurity. Think about what the person is going through and see what you can do or say to help them. You can also boost your confidence by reaching out and helping those who have been hurt by the cruel or thoughtless words of others.
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Prioritize your thoughts. Your confidence often falters when you allow others to control your emotions. Don’t put too much weight on what other people think of you. Instead, put your thoughts first. [6] X Research Sources
- For example, if someone says “You’re not going to make it,” but you don’t believe it, remind yourself of your thoughts. You might say to yourself, “That’s not true. I believe that I will achieve good things.”
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Get some things done to feel more confident. How you feel about yourself and your abilities is often closely related to confidence. You can increase your confidence by taking on more challenges. Think of a goal or task that you want to achieve, then break those goals down into smaller tasks that you can work on one at a time. [7] X Research Sources
- For example, if you want to be financially independent, you first find a job. Then you need to find a place to stay with a cost that matches your income. Next, you will create a savings account or stock investment to generate long-term financial benefits.
- Consistently completing each step will help you feel more confident and more confident that you can take on new challenges.
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Take a deep breath and repeat the mantra that energizes you. Deep breathing is a great way to increase feelings of relaxation. When combined with a positive reassurance, this exercise can help you build confidence in yourself and your abilities. [8] X Research Sources
- For example, take a deep breath through your nose and say quietly, “I’m breathing in faith and confidence.” Hold your breath for a few seconds, then exhale and say to yourself, “I am breathing out negativity and doubt.”
Emotional healing
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Practice loving yourself every day. When you ignore your feelings, the painful feeling will reappear. Combat negative comments or behavior from others by treating yourself with loving kindness. This can be done in many ways, such as making a list of the positive activities you enjoy the most. Then, make up your mind to get a few things done each day. [9] X Research Source
- For example, you might like to cook healthy meals for yourself, go for a walk with your dog by the lake, or meditate before bed.
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Learn from experience. You always learn something from a painful argument or experience. After you get over the pain, take time to look back on what happened. Some issues you should think about include:
- What’s going on in that person’s life or in your relationship and that person is causing them to spit out harsh words?
- Are there any lessons that can help you from those words, even if they are said bitterly or unconstructively?
- If someone told you the same thing later, how would you react?
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Surround yourself with positive people. Positive people radiate positive energy, while consumers do the opposite. Consider reducing your time around negative or malicious people who criticize or belittle you. Spend time with the people who stand by your side and appreciate you. [10] X Research Source
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Do things that you like. A good way to heal emotionally after being hurt is to engage in fun activities. Pick up a hobby, join a new club or organization, or get back to doing something you’ve given up on for a long time. Make time every day or every week for something that makes you happy. [11] X Research Source
- It could be pursuing a passion for learning or teaching others a skill you’ve mastered, or simply improving your craft in sewing or gardening.
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Give away more. Quickly heal emotions by doing good deeds for others. Try to create positive connections with the people in your life or community.
- Interact positively with the people you love by showing your appreciation for them and letting them know the good things you see in them. For example, you would say “Minh, you have helped me a lot. I don’t know what it would be like without you.” [12] X Research Source
- You can also do this through some kind acts, such as helping a neighbor with something or inviting the person sitting behind you in the restaurant for lunch. You can also spread positive energy in the community by volunteering or donating to charity.
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Keep a journal to better understand your feelings. Writing down your thoughts can clarify what’s going on in your inner world. Moreover, when writing harsh comments, the feeling of torment will be reduced. Start the habit of journaling by taking a few minutes to write each day. [13] X Research Source
- You can write about the day’s events, follow the instructions on the journaling app, or write down something you appreciate.
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This article was co-written by Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC. Moshe Ratson is the CEO of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a training and therapy clinic in New York City. Moshe is a certified career coach by the International Federation of Coaches. He received a master’s degree in marriage and family therapy from the University of Iona. Moshe is a member of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapists (AAMFT) and a member of the International Federation of Coaches (ICF).
There are 11 references cited in this article that you can view at the bottom of the page.
This article has been viewed 26,838 times.
People often say “Words fly”, but it doesn’t seem to be true. When someone calls you by a name that mocks or demeans you, your emotions will be greatly affected. Therefore, learn to let go of harsh words by reducing their power, increasing your self-esteem and healing your emotions.
Thank you for reading this post How to Forget Hurt Words at Tnhelearning.edu.vn You can comment, see more related articles below and hope to help you with interesting information.
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