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This article was co-written by Wits End Parenting. Wits End Parenting is a parenting company based in Berkeley, California that works with children with temperamental or emotional moods, listening difficulties, and aggression. Wits End Parenting experts use a positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s personality, providing lasting results, eliminating the need for parents to devise new strategies to educate their children. their.
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Masturbation is very common behavior among children. While many see masturbation as a natural and harmless way for children to discover their sexuality, excessive and/or inappropriate masturbation can cause major problems, especially when This happens in public. Children of all ages masturbate, and children under the age of 5 may not know the need to find a private place to do so. Stay calm and avoid jumping to conclusions that your child has a mental health problem. Instead of punishing or treating your child, when you see your child behaving this way, gently set limits, talk openly, and encourage more appropriate behavior.
Steps
Set limits and control behavior
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Give your child some privacy at home. Everyone needs some alone time, teenagers and children alike, this alone time is often the right time to engage in masturbation. However, if your baby decides to masturbate right in front of you or others, you need to correct this behavior. As children have more alone time, inappropriate behavior is likely to decrease. [1] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
- Masturbation is allowed at bedtime. If you catch your baby masturbating at bedtime or alone in the bathroom, don’t punish him, just leave him alone.
- Remember that masturbation does not mean that your child will start having sex with someone else. It’s just an act of self-discovery of each person.
- After addressing your child’s inappropriate behavior in front of others, give your child some privacy at home, but continue to supervise when she is with other children.
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Distracting. When in public you won’t want to deal with this behavior directly because it draws more attention. However, you can distract your child to stop the behavior and help him focus on something more appropriate. If your child is young, you can use video games as a distraction. If your child is older, you should ask him something or ask him to do something for you. [2] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
- You might say, “Can you go get a napkin for me?” or “Get me some chewing gum from my wallet!”
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Have your child carry a reassurance when in public. Letting young children carry a blanket or stuffed animal can be a great way to keep their hands busy and not have time to think about masturbation. This is also a way to reassure children who are often afraid of being in public, or have physical disabilities. [3] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
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Bring them home. If you’re staying close to home, take your baby to her room so she can be alone in her own space. For example, you are at a neighbor’s house with your child and he is old enough to be able to go home by himself. If this is the case, you should ask them to go home and talk later. [4] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
- If your child is too young, you have to take them home and explain it to them.
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Update information from teachers. Children may masturbate in public when you are or are not there, for example when they are at school. If your child masturbates at school, you should find some solutions so that they can forget the urge and wait until they get home. Contact teachers to find out about their learning, and know what problems they are having. [5] X Research Sources
- Don’t ask directly about masturbation because you shouldn’t embarrass your child or put the teacher on alert.
- You can say something like, “I want to know how Cuong is studying these days. Is there any information about your grades or behavior that I need to know about?”
- If the teacher says your child masturbates often in class, thank them and let them know you are working with them on the issue, and ask them to call if it continues.
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Talk to your child’s caregiver. If your child has a caregiver, including a before or after school tutor, babysitter, nanny, or any other form of support, talk to them about it. Ask them to provide information about your child’s actions, and indicate how you would like them to respond to those dilemmas. [6] X Research Sources
- It takes consistency so that all of your child’s caregivers have the same treatment for your child’s masturbation.
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Increase confidence. Masturbation may be more likely to occur in children seeking pleasure. To control this behavior, you must create a variety of healthy activities for children so that they have a job when they need to have fun, and help build confidence so that they can find relaxation from other activities. [7] X Research Sources
- Allow your child to enjoy a variety of hobbies and activities. Find activities that are really fun to get them involved and boost their confidence.
- Let your child know they are competent and respected by everyone in the family. Create a warm environment to encourage and boost your child’s confidence.
How to communicate with children
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Notice the voice. Don’t confront them harshly or in a way that makes them cower or embarrassed. If your baby is too young, they may not realize what they’re doing or the sexual implications of it, so being understanding and gentle is key to influencing their perception of gender. Future. This also increases the likelihood that they will be willing to talk to you about sex in the future, rather than looking for someone else or keeping it a secret. [8] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
- Remember: don’t make them feel ashamed or guilty about masturbation; Simply explain that masturbation in public is unacceptable.
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Choose the right time. You’ll want to deal with this behavior immediately when you see it, but you shouldn’t discipline your child harshly in public. Simply ask your child to “stop” or distract her from the behavior. When you get home, talk to them privately about what you did and explain why the behavior was inappropriate.
- You could say something like, “You know, your body is yours and you can touch it if you want, but there are places where you shouldn’t be unless you’re alone in the room. Don’t do that when you’re out of the house. Do you understand?”
- Don’t talk about it in front of other people. You shouldn’t let your child feel offended in public.
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Explain to them that there is nothing wrong with exploring private parts of the body. What they’re doing isn’t really the problem, it’s just that the location isn’t right. Let them know it’s not appropriate to show or touch private parts in public or in the presence of others. [9] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
- Compare masturbation to other things that should be done in private, like showering or going to the bathroom.
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Indicate options. Instead of focusing on what your child shouldn’t do, turn the discussion to what he can do. Explain that if she wants to masturbate, she can do it in a private place like the bedroom or bathroom. [10] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
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Be understanding and try to be friends with your child. With older children, this talk can lead to a lot of questions about gender, so be open to hearing questions and answer honestly about family actions and values in your life. they. With young children, you should talk more about the private parts of the body and their functions.
- For young children, you should not talk too deeply about issues that they are not ready to accept; Truthfully but simply. For example, you could just say, “It’s okay to touch it, but you can’t do that in class or in the presence of other people. Would you like to go into the break room for a moment and do it?”
- Think about who your child likes to listen to the most. Some children prefer to listen to their parents of the same sex, or take the trouble to listen to someone who is usually closer to them.
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Watch for signs of abuse. If you see your child masturbating repeatedly to the point of self-harm, trying to convince other children to masturbate, or if you suspect someone is teaching your child to masturbate, call your pediatrician. pediatric or therapist. Sexual abuse may have happened and that is the root of the problem.
- Note that recurring UTIs can also be a sign of excessive masturbation, or ongoing abuse.
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Take away privileges if they don’t comply with the regulations. After knowing when it’s appropriate and inappropriate to masturbate, your child can still act beyond these boundaries, when you have to strip them of some of their privileges. That action will reassure them that masturbation in public is unacceptable and will control this bad behavior. [11] X Research Source
- Consider confiscating your phone or TV rights.
- Say, “Cuong, I talked about your masturbation. You can do it in your room but not at school. Since you did it today, I will confiscate the phone for a few days as punishment.”
Create positive motivation
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Show more love for your child. Some children masturbate for the pleasure of physical touch, a desire not necessarily related to sex. Hug your baby more, sit next to him on the couch while watching TV, and generally be more cuddly. If they start groping while sitting next to you, ask them to go to their room or to the toilet. [12] X Trusted Source Michigan Medicine Go to Source
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Do not enter your child’s room without knocking. While setting limits with your child, you also need to set limits with yourself, and allow them to have their own space. After explaining to them the right places to masturbate, you must not enter their private space without knocking.
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Be optimistic and always supportive. This process can be new to both you and the child. Be firm with them but still be gentle and supportive. Remind them that it’s okay to masturbate in private, and tell them you’re always available to listen if they have questions. [13] X Research Source
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Teach your child coping skills. Some children look to this comforting feeling as a way to cope with or release stress. Teach your child how to verbally express feelings like “sad” or “angry,” and let them know that there’s nothing wrong with feeling bored, but that feeling should be expressed in words. [14] X Research Source
- Implement appropriate behavior in everyday life, especially in the presence of your child, to help them better understand how to properly respond to stress.
Advice
- Don’t be too tough, angry or strict about this. You will only scare your child and make things worse.
- It was discovered that even unborn babies masturbate. At that point the baby had no way of making the conscious decision to masturbate, but it happened anyway.
- Remind your child that you are always there to help them.
- Show love but be firm when dealing with this.
X
This article was co-written by Wits End Parenting. Wits End Parenting is a parenting company based in Berkeley, California that works with children with temperamental or emotional moods, listening difficulties, and aggression. Wits End Parenting experts use a positive discipline that is tailored to each child’s personality, providing lasting results, eliminating the need for parents to devise new strategies to educate their children. their.
This article has been viewed 77,414 times.
Masturbation is very common behavior among children. While many see masturbation as a natural and harmless way for children to discover their sexuality, excessive and/or inappropriate masturbation can cause major problems, especially when This happens in public. Children of all ages masturbate, and children under the age of 5 may not know the need to find a private place to do so. Stay calm and avoid jumping to conclusions that your child has a mental health problem. Instead of punishing or treating your child, when you see your child behaving this way, gently set limits, talk openly, and encourage more appropriate behavior.
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