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How to Forgive Yourself

January 19, 2024 by admin Category: How To

You are viewing the article How to Forgive Yourself  at Tnhelearning.edu.vn you can quickly access the necessary information in the table of contents of the article below.

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This article was co-written by Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC. Moshe Ratson is the CEO of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a training and therapy clinic in New York City. He received his Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona University and has been in therapy for over 10 years.

There are 18 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 20,906 times.

Forgiveness is a difficult thing. Admitting your mistakes and correcting them takes time, patience, and courage. This is even more difficult when we have to forgive our own mistakes. The path to forgiveness is not an easy one. By being self-aware and aware that life is a journey, not a sprint, you can also learn to forgive yourself.

Table of Contents

  • Steps
    • Practice self-forgiveness
    • Forget the past
    • Talk about forgiving yourself and others
    • Take responsibility for your actions
    • Challenge yourself to do things well
  • Advice
  • Warning

Steps

Practice self-forgiveness

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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 1

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Find out why you need to forgive yourself. If we realize we made a mistake, we will feel guilty and need forgiveness. When you think about past events, they can create feelings of discomfort. To determine why you feel this way, ask yourself:

  • Do I feel this way because the results of what I do make me feel bad?
  • Do I feel this because I’m blaming myself for the bad results?
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 2

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Admit that mistakes don’t make you a bad person. Everyone makes mistakes at some point in their life. Don’t think that making a mistake – be it at work or in a relationship – will make you a bad person. As Bill Gates said, “It’s good to celebrate success, but it’s more important to be mindful of failure.” [1] X Research Source Learning from the mistakes of others is also a way of forgiveness.
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 3

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Don’t be afraid to start over. To truly forgive yourself, don’t be afraid to start over. Learning to forgive yourself isn’t just about learning to live with the past. It’s also about learning from experience. Take what you’ve learned and apply it to build a better self. [2] X Research Source
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 4

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Adapt to a new mindset by learning from past mistakes. One way to move forward is to adapt from what you’ve learned. [3] X Research Sources

  • Setting future goals for yourself will make you think more positively and stronger. Looking into the future will help you forgive yourself in the present by focusing on the positive changes you can make. [4] X Research Sources
  • Whenever you feel guilty, follow the words of Les Brown: “Forgive your flaws and mistakes and move on.” That will help you whenever you make a mistake.

Forget the past

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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 5

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Realize that no one is perfect. Maybe you want to forgive yourself for your actions against others. You must first realize that you are not to blame for the actions of others. We all make mistakes and many times in our lives we have not done our best. Realizing this will be the step you need to take in your self-healing process.
Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 6

Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 6

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Don’t live forever in the mistakes of the past. It’s good to learn from past mistakes, but living in those mistakes can prevent you from forgiving yourself. It can prevent you from being aware of the present reality. Your life can become stagnant if you keep obsessing over the things you did and didn’t do. Instead, focus on the present and what you can do in the future to make your life better.
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 7

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Plan for a bright future free from the past today. Consider “fixing and moving forward” your life. If you’ve been in a similar situation that has upset you in the past, focus on the things you can control.

  • Try to fix the problems that you know you can control and try not to mind the rest. You don’t want to repeat the same mistake. [5] X Research Sources
READ More:   How to Get Rid of Mosquitoes in the Yard
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 8

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Learn to pay attention. Self-awareness of current actions can heal future wounds. [6] X Research Source If you cultivate a strong sense of self and accept actions in the present, it will help you build a better future and help you forgive past actions .
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 9

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Review past decisions. You don’t want to live in your mistakes forever, but you need to learn from them in order to move forward in a positive way.

  • One way to forgive yourself is to identify the cause of your emotions in the first offense. If you identify what you did wrong the first time, you can change your outlook in the future.
  • Ask yourself: “What mistake did I make and what can I do to avoid making the same?” [7] X Research Sources
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 10

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Identify things that make you emotionally strong. This will help you immediately identify situations that make you uncomfortable. Once you have identified the situation you should be able to easily find a solution. Ask yourself:

  • Do I feel nervous or guilty when I meet my boss?
  • Do I feel strong negative emotions when talking to important people?
  • Does spending time with my parents make me feel angry or upset?

Talk about forgiving yourself and others

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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 11

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Let someone else come into your life. As the philosopher Derrida once said: “Forgiveness often confuses people, sometimes in a premeditated situation, it comes with: apology, regret, pardon, wrong. make, and so on.” [8] X Research source .

  • Forgiveness is a two-way street. You won’t be able to forgive yourself if you don’t learn to forgive others. You need to let other people into your life so they can give you advice and ways to forgive yourself.
  • Talk to loved ones to support you in your struggle with self-forgiveness.
Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 12

Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 12

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Outline a solution or plan. To forgive yourself you should be aware of what you need to forgive. Map out a detailed step-by-step guide that can help you focus on what’s important and give you guidance on forgiving yourself or others. [9] X Research Resources Take a close look at the following aspects of forgiveness creation:

  • Declare or request an apology using direct language. Don’t go around. Directly say “I’m sorry” or ask “Can you forgive me?”. You don’t want things to be ambiguous or let go insincerely.
  • Find a way you can actually fix the workaround. If you’re asking for forgiveness, think of specific actions that can make up for it. If you’re forgiving yourself, ask yourself what steps you need to take to move forward in a positive way.
  • Promise yourself and others that you will strive to be better in the future. It will only be an insincere apology if you don’t follow through on your promise. Make sure you don’t make the same mistake.
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 13

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Ask for forgiveness from others. If you ask forgiveness from others, you will feel better yourself.

  • Sometimes, a clear atmosphere can solve an existing problem. It also indicates that you are absorbing a bigger problem than the real one. [10] X Research Sources Asking for forgiveness has been shown to have many beneficial results and strengthen relationships for the better.

Take responsibility for your actions

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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 14

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Be honest with yourself about your actions. Before you can fully forgive yourself, you need to first acknowledge your own actions.

  • It helps to write down actions that make you feel strongly. This will point to specific examples of why you have negative feelings about yourself.
Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 15

Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 15

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Stop thinking rationally and start taking responsibility for what you say and do. One way to be honest with yourself is to accept the consequences of your actions. If you have done or said something wrong then you need to admit the action before you forgive yourself for it.

  • One way to achieve this is to let go of the stress. The more stress you keep inside, the more harm you do to yourself.
  • Stress can sometimes cause you to explode with anger and hurt yourself and those around you, but if you forgive yourself, the anger will go away and the consequences will be gone. As a result, you will be more focused and have more positive thoughts than negative ones.
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 16

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Accept the guilt you are having. Acknowledging responsibility is one thing, but understanding the emotions behind it is another. Having strong emotions such as guilt is not only common but also good. Guilt will encourage you to take action for yourself and others. [11] X Research source .

  • You may feel guilty about your own thoughts. You may have thoughts that cause hurt or unhappiness to others. You feel everything as a lust or greed.
  • If you are buried in such feelings of guilt, that is normal. Your guilt can be rooted in such strong emotions, it’s good to face them and admit why you feel the way you do. Only in this way can you forgive yourself.
  • You may criticize yourself (or others) for being too harsh on guilt. You may be venting your feelings on yourself and others, making you feel guilty about your actions. You blame others for insecurities and increased guilt.
  • If you find yourself blaming someone else, step back and admit why you say things the way you do. It will help you on your path to self-forgiveness.
  • You may feel guilty for the actions of others. It’s not uncommon for a couple to sometimes feel guilty for the other’s actions. You may feel guilty for your partner’s actions or insecurities.
  • You should determine why you feel this way if you want to forgive yourself and others. [12] X Research Source
Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 17

Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 17

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Identify your own values and beliefs. Before you can forgive yourself, you must determine what your values are and what you believe in. [13] X Trusted Source Greater Good Magazine Go to Source Take some time to think about how you can atone for things you feel guilty about. Think about how you can make a real difference. These actions may be based on spiritualism, or on the needs of society.
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 18

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Analyze your needs versus your wants. One way to forgive negative emotions is to define what you need in life versus what you want.

  • Identify both specific needs – such as shelter, food, social needs – and compare them to specific wants – a nicer car, a bigger house, and a nicer body. Identifying these needs versus wants can help you realize that perhaps you’ve been too hard on yourself or that these things are out of your control. [14] X Research Source

Challenge yourself to do things well

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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 19

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Become a better person through personal challenges. To stop falling back into doubt and guilt, offer small challenges that will help you become a better person. [15] X Research Source

  • You can do this by making it a habit for a month about the things you want to improve on. By doing something for a month – like tracking calories – you will begin to develop a beneficial habit to improve. This will help you to forgive yourself by acting in a positive way.
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Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 20

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Action based on identified fault. Try evaluating your own performance to determine how to measure your own improvement.

  • If you find yourself guilty of procrastination, for example, make a to-do list and try to do it. Determining what you can control is quite important. This will help with self-forgiveness by self-improvement.
  • Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 21

    Image titled Forgive Yourself Step 21

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    Practice self-awareness. Self-awareness is the ability to predict the consequences of our actions. [16] X Research Source Thinking about ourselves and our actions can help us become better people by creating moral values for ourselves. You can practice self-awareness by paying attention to your strengths, observing your reactions to situations, and expressing your emotions. [17] X Research Source
  • Advice

    • Instead of thinking about the past, you should focus on the present and prepare for the future. Remember, your past does NOT tell you who you are. You are amazing and beautiful! Learn from mistakes, forgive yourself and move forward!
    • Think about how you have forgiven others in the past. Draw lessons from these experiences and apply them to your own case; this gives you peace of mind knowing you are capable of forgiving, and you just need to point out that forgiveness is the way to go.
    • Most of the mistakes of the past have made you who you are today. So don’t just see them as mistakes, see them as lessons.
    • Mistakes don’t say who you are. Believe that you are a great person. Think about all those terrible mistakes a normal/nice person has made and learn from them. Your mistake is not that bad!
    • We are the result of the good and bad things that are happening in our lives, the same good and bad things that we have done. How we deal with negative things is just as important as how we deal with good things. A person who is inclined to reflect on what has been done and make a big deal out of it will be more likely to live in anger, resentment, and expect a negative future than someone who sees bad things as isolated events. without affecting them as a whole. [18] X David Niven Research Source , “100 Simple Secrets of Happy People: What Scientists Learned and How You Can Apply”, p. 16 (2000), ISBN 0-06-251650-7
    • Forgiving yourself and others does not mean forgetting the past. It’s the memories that are kept when you forgive. This is like the cycle of grief.
    • Life goes on so forgive and forget mistakes.
    • Forgive those who have hurt you, and hope they realize their wrongdoings and make peace either for you or for themselves… Move forward, for precious life is too short for sorrows. painful.
    • Get a stress toy. When you start to feel guilty, play with your toys.
    • Another great way to forgive yourself is to help others. You will have love for others and your love will conquer your sins. Remember not to dwell on your mistakes because life is too short to live in misery.
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    Warning

    • Don’t force yourself to think about people who bring up the negative past; Those who push you into a pit, reduce and belittle your worth, and those who don’t care about your vulnerability, it’s best to leave them behind.
    • Stay away from people who intend to sabotage your self-improvement efforts. These people spend most of their time focusing on saving their own insecurities and are intimidated by other people’s efforts to overcome negative pressures in their lives. Accept that forgiving yourself will sometimes take away certain relationships where your negativity causes others to exert power over you. Ask yourself if you want to move on with the bad relationships or move forward, and reinvent yourself so you can fit in with other good people.
    • Avoid talking about your wrongdoings and how bad you are around other people. You will also create this in their mind. Treatment to remove negative thoughts from the head and return to the beginning of the mysterious Pandora’s box.
    • Forgiveness is the hardest quality to shape, and it’s also the most essential. As you learn about your ability to forgive yourself and others, your growth will be sublime, and it will be a worthy reward for your forgiveness.
    X

    This article was co-written by Moshe Ratson, MFT, PCC. Moshe Ratson is the CEO of spiral2grow Marriage & Family Therapy, a training and therapy clinic in New York City. He received his Master’s degree in Marriage and Family Therapy from Iona University and has been in therapy for over 10 years.

    There are 18 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.

    This article has been viewed 20,906 times.

    Forgiveness is a difficult thing. Admitting your mistakes and correcting them takes time, patience, and courage. This is even more difficult when we have to forgive our own mistakes. The path to forgiveness is not an easy one. By being self-aware and aware that life is a journey, not a sprint, you can also learn to forgive yourself.

    Thank you for reading this post How to Forgive Yourself at Tnhelearning.edu.vn You can comment, see more related articles below and hope to help you with interesting information.

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