15 signs that reveal your ex will come back to you

X

This article was co-written by Connell Barrett. Connell Barrett is a love consultant, founder and executive coach of Dating Transformation, a relationship consulting firm he founded in 2017 and based out of New York City. Connell advises clients based on the XRB Dating System: Authenticity, Clarity, and Expression. He is also a dating coach with the dating app The League. His work has been featured in Cosmoppitan, The Oprah Magazine and Today.

There are 8 references cited in this article that you can see at the bottom of the page.

This article has been viewed 28,224 times.

Breaking up is never easy, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the relationship is over! If you’re wondering if your ex will ever rekindle the flame of love with you, look for the telltale signs that your ex still has a crush on you. Read on for all the signs that your ex is coming back to you, from social media posts to promising words they’ll tell you.

Table of Contents

Things you need to know

Your ex is likely to get back together if they’re in a filling relationship, if the breakup was an impulsive decision, or if the breakup was mutually consensual.
Your ex can come back if they don’t block your number and still follow you on social media. They may also try to contact you again.
If the two of you have a chance to talk, your ex may bring up the past, compliment you, ask to meet you, or apologize for their mistake.

They don’t block your phone number

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/e/e6/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-1.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-1.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/e/e6/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-1.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-1.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

If they don’t block your number, it means they haven’t explicitly cut it off. Often the best way to get over your ex is to cut off all contact, even block or delete their number. ^{[1] X Source of Research} So if your ex doesn’t, it’s probably because they don’t want to let go yet. Although they are not ready to return at this time, they are still leaving the door open to resume communication in the future.

You can check if you’re blocked by calling or texting your ex. If you are blocked, both of the above communication methods will not work.
Try sending a simple text message first. If you’re not blocked, there will be a “Sent” or “Read” message under your messages. If there is no notification, it means you have been blocked.

They are sad for weeks after breaking up

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/9/98/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-2.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-2.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/9/98/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-2.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-2.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Your ex hasn’t forgotten about you if they’ve been depressed for a long time after you broke up. Look for signs that they’re still upset, especially about the breakup. Check out their social media posts or observe if they seem sad when the two of you run into each other. If you’re in touch with your ex’s friends, you can ask how he’s been doing. ^{[2] X Research Source}

If your ex isn’t happy after the breakup, their friends may just say they’re “just fine,” or “just fine” instead of saying they’re happy.
Any dark post describing your ex’s feelings of loneliness on social media can be a sign that they haven’t forgotten you.

They are active on your social network

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/5/51/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-3.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-3.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/5/51/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-3.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-3.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

When your ex follows you on social media and posts about you, it means they still remember you. Social media is a place where one can easily stay connected discreetly. Review your recent posts to see if they liked or commented on them, and check your Instagram, Facebook or Snapchat stories to see if your ex has seen them. The more active on your social network, the more they think about you.

Your ex may even send you direct messages. A private message is a surefire sign that they still have an ex, even if it’s just a funny video they think you like.

They don’t return your items

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/e/ed/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-4.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-4.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/e/ed/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-4.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-4.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Your ex may not return your things if they are still struggling to break up. People can easily forget their ex if there are no reminders of the other person around. Do you find that your ex avoids return appointments or makes last-minute excuses to cancel a swap? If they don’t want to return the items you left behind, they may still be holding onto things that remind them of you. ^{[3] X Research Sources}

The person may still be leaving your old photos or videos on their social media. Deleting an ex’s social media account is like getting rid of an old item, so if that person still has the photos, it means they still have you in their hearts.

They keep in touch with your friends and relatives

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/7/78/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-5.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-5.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/7/78/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-5.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-5.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Keeping in touch with your social connections is a discreet way for your ex to continue stalking you. Ask your friends if your ex has asked you anything recently, and your family members as well. If your ex wants to get back (consciously or unconsciously), they will often ask people how you’ve been doing or say hello to your family members often. ^{[4] X Research Sources}

If you two have mutual friends, it can be difficult to tell if your ex hangs out with them for fun or for you. If possible, ask friends who only know your ex through you.
If your ex’s friends and family (especially parents) still contact you from time to time to check in, that’s also a positive sign that the ex hasn’t forgotten about you.

They actively communicate regularly

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/b/b1/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-6.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-6.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b1/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-6.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-6.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Contacting you is a sign that your ex wants you back. It’s normal for people to call their ex once or twice to close things off, but if your ex is calling or texting you regularly, they’re probably looking for something more. Notice if your crush asks you or texts you every time they see something that reminds you of you. If your ex still communicates with you regularly, it means they still care and think a lot about you.

If he wants you back, he’ll also open up to you more. Do they confide in you or ask you for advice? This means that you are more than just a friend in their eyes – you are someone they truly love!
If they miss you, your ex will reply to you immediately (and with great enthusiasm) when you contact them.
Try polling when they contact you; send a short message “How are you?” to see how they respond.

They nostalgic for the past

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/2/2d/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-7.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-7.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/2/2d/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-7.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-7.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Nostalgia for the past means that they still have a heavy heart and nostalgia for the relationship with you. Does he mention happy moments with you or send you old photos of the two of you together? Do they remember important dates like your birthday or old anniversaries? If they look back on the old days with affection, it means they still miss you and keep in their hearts the memories you two had together.

For example, suddenly your ex sends you a picture of the two of you together and says, “Facebook just reminded me of this! It was a fun day, wasn’t it? 😊”
Your ex may not even hesitate to confess their feelings and say that they miss you (and your relationship). If they do, it’s a clear sign that they want to mend the relationship.

They constantly “accidentally” bump into you

They offer to spend time with you

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/e/e2/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-9.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-9.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/e/e2/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-9.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-9.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

If your ex is looking for an opportunity to be with you, it means they want to get back together. Does your ex still ask you out or join you in fun activities? Do they try to stay near you and find excuses to visit you? If your partner makes an effort to spend quality time with you, then they’re letting you know they still care about you. Perhaps they think about you often and miss you.

Making arrangements to stay together after a breakup can take a while, so that’s a good sign!
If your ex didn’t talk to you right after the breakup and is now slowly moving closer to you, it could mean that they’ve spent some time processing their feelings and really want to mend the relationship.

They say good things about you

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/b/ba/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-10.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-10.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/ba/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-10.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-10.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Compliments from your ex show that they see you in a positive light. Breakups can lead to resentment, so friendliness and compliments from your ex is a good sign! Let’s say they applaud or congratulate you on some of your accomplishments (especially about something that’s improved or changed). It means they like what they’re seeing – even regret breaking up with you. ^{[6] X Research Sources}

For example, your ex might say, “I see you’ve changed a lot since we were dating.”
They may mention something new to compliment you, such as “Your new hairstyle is so pretty! I’ve never seen you with hair like that, but I like it!” or “Oh, you’ve been promoted since I last saw you? You are a talent!”

They apologize for their mistakes

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/3/36/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-11.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-11.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/3/36/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-11.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-11.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Apologies show that they have rethinked the breakup and want to fix it. Does your ex apologize to you for something they did that caused you to break up? Relationships thrive if two people take the time to recognize problems and talk to each other honestly and constructively. If your ex wants to do this and take responsibility for their shortcomings, then they are seriously intending to mend the relationship. ^{[7] X Research Sources}

A sincere apology is more than simply “I’m sorry”. The person must understand what happened, why their actions hurt, how it made you feel, and how they intend to fix the problem.

The two of you have broken up many times before

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/a/a2/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-12.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-12.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/a/a2/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-12.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-12.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

If your relationship is on the fly, they’re more likely to get back together. Look for signs that your ex likes to play mind games or behave hot and cold with you. How many times have you two broken up and got back together? Do they have a string of exes or constantly question their relationship with you? In this case, the person will probably get back to you soon. ^{[8] X Research Sources}

If your ex has repeatedly fretted over the breakup and expressed remorse, that’s a big sign that they want to get back together.
However, perhaps you should also consider whether such an erratic relationship is what you want. If your ex is willing to work through past issues and act mature, the two of you can get back together! If not, maybe it’s time to find a healthier relationship.

They look for a compensatory relationship

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/c/c3/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-13.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-13.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/c/c3/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-13.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-13.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Their “fill-in” relationships are actually a sign that they still haven’t forgotten about you. This is a relationship where a person who has just returned as a single person just wants to find something to forget the pain of a breakup. If your ex seems to start dating again too soon – like 1-2 weeks after breaking up – don’t despair! Letting go of an old love takes time, so if your ex jumps right into a new one, it’s probably just a temporary replacement. ^{[9] X Research Source}

These types of compensatory relationships often end quickly, as relationship seekers often focus on the ex and comfort after the breakup rather than on the person they’re dating.

Breaking up was an impulsive decision for them

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/a/a0/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-14.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-14.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/a/a0/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-14.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-14.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

Decisions made in the heat of the moment are often regretted later. There are many couples who make sudden decisions and break up in moments of frustration, narcissism or anger. Both can get angry with each other and blurt out thoughtless things. However, if the two of you broke up just because of a few words in the heat, then redemption and repair of the relationship is possible.

If you were so heartbroken at the time of the breakup, you can say something to your ex, such as, “I was very angry at the time, but after thinking about it, I want to talk to you about it now.”

The two parted in peace

{“smallUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images_en/thumb/b/b0/Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-15.jpg/v4-728px-Signs- Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-15.jpg”,”bigUrl”:”https://www.wikihow.com/images/thumb/b/b0/Signs-Your-Ex-Will- eventually-Come-Back-Step-15.jpg/v4-728px-Signs-Your-Ex-Will-Eventually-Come-Back-Step-15.jpg”,”smallWidth”:460,”smallHeight”:345,” bigWidth”:728,”bigHeight”:546,”licensing”:”<div class=”mw-parser-output”></div>”}

A breakup for external reasons is less likely to leave resentment. Consider the situation when the two of you broke up. Was it an amicable, civilized breakup or for objective reasons that you cannot control? Do you and your ex still love and respect each other? It would be much easier to reconnect if there were no bitterness and resentment in the problems between the two of you.

For example, the two of you may be breaking up because of geographical distance or conflicting work schedules, or one of you may be stressed or depressed and need time to take care of yourself.
In this case, even if they break up, it doesn’t mean that the two people don’t love each other; Maybe it’s just circumstances that don’t allow it. If you have the opportunity to reconnect, you may find your ex desperately wants to get back together. But honestly, sometimes it’s best to just close things and move on with your life.